By My Side

by Shannon Kizzia

Pairing:  M/K

Rating:  NC-17

Keywords:  Pre/Post-Colonization

Artwork:  Elly (With deepest gratitude!)

Warning:  Character death.  I don’t want to give anything away.  Suffice to say…Mulder and Krycek will be together forever.

Spoilers:  All mythology through The Red and the Black.  I change canon then, but I still reference later myth/arc eps.

Summary:  It’s the end.  Mulder and Krycek partner up once again to fight it together.

Disclaimers:  The characters of Mulder and Krycek belonged to Chris Carter.  I have just used them wantonly, passionately, and with all the love in my heart.  All other characters, excepting Scully, Well-Manicured Man, and the Gunmen, are mine, the property of me, myself , and I, and if Chris uses ‘em, you bet your ass I'll sue!  Mwaahaahaaa!

Archive:  Yes, to any list it's posted to.  Everyone else just ask.

Date of First Posting:  March 11, 2004 to the M/K Lyric Wheel

Thanks:  To Verily for the lyrics!

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“Think I wouldn’t be ready for you this time, Krycek?” Mulder snarled quietly as he backed the other man against the wall by his coat tree, his gun in Krycek’s gut.   “I left the stove light off, you asshole.”

Krycek groaned a little as Mulder’s gun pressed deeply into his abdomen.  Mulder felt the hard resistance of flexing muscle.  Krycek’s stomach, Mulder’s weapon…evenly matched.

“What?  You fix yourself a little something?” he asked, tilting his head.  “Get peckish?” He enunciated with his gun again.

Krycek grunted out a breathless laugh.  “You’re late.”

It wasn’t a denial, and more over it sounded like a complaint or an excuse one or the other.  Mulder licked his lips in order not to smile.  It felt insane to be wanting to smile right now.

“I didn’t know we had a date,” he muttered.

“Take my gun, Mulder.  I’m not here to hurt you.”

Mulder raised his eyebrows, trying to see more of Krycek’s glittering eyes in the dark.

“I didn’t come here to do the gun thing,” Krycek elaborated, dropping his eyes to the one bruising his middle.  “Yours or mine.”

Mulder stared at him for a minute and then backed off.  “Hand it over.”  He reached out and waited as Krycek withdrew a gun from his back and presented it, butt first.  Mulder emptied the clip and then handed it back.  Krycek raised his eyebrows.  “But I want the knife, too,”  Mulder informed him.

Krycek’s face transformed as a smile spread across it.  He stashed the gun again and then pulled a blade from his pocket and extended it, non-threateningly.

“Piano wire?”  Mulder inquired.

“That was so 1997,” Krycek’s gravelly voice answered.

Mulder licked his lips again.  Then he cleared his throat.  “What are you doing here, Krycek?”

Krycek immediately turned serious as well, seeming almost nervous suddenly.  “Let’s sit down,” he suggested.

“You’re not my friend,”  Mulder told him, frowning.

Krycek’s reply was a harsh whisper, a challenge.  “I’m not?”  At Mulder’s continued stone face, Krycek went on.  “There’s a lot we need to talk about, Mulder.”

Mulder sighed, the frown remaining.  But he nodded a little and held his arm out, waiting for Krycek to lead them into the living room.  He watched as the man passed him, his leather whispering conspiratorially.

Krycek left the room dark and, despite his own request, remained standing.  When he turned to face Mulder, Mulder noticed how his left arm hung strangely at his side.  Several things flashed at him at once:  the Tunguskan forest, ‘Isn’t that how you like to beat yourself?’, and Krycek using chopsticks with his left hand at a Chinese restaurant once upon a time.

They’d cut it off.

Those animals had cut it off.

And he’d been caught looking.

“Think I should’ve gone with a hook?”

“What?”  Mulder’s voice was a shocked breath as he found Krycek’s face amidst the shadows.

Krycek raised the fake limb.  “I said a hook.”  He raised his eyebrows and then let the prosthetic fall to his side.  “Would’ve been more menacing.”  He shrugged and looked away.

And I made a joke last time, Mulder thought, defeatedly.  “I’m sorry,” he muttered, feeling sick.

Krycek’s narrowed gaze shot to his.  “Pity’s not a good look on you, Mulder.”

Mulder swallowed around a thick throat.

“Besides,”  Krycek began again, his voice a little higher, less dangerous.  “It’s not one of the things we need to talk about.”

Mulder shook thoughts away of how they might have discarded of a severed human arm in the frozen forest night and focused on the man squared off against him in his living room.  He was here again.  He seemed to be here a lot.  Mulder frowned.

“Another non-existent rebel alien?” Mulder asked, his sarcasm a quiet and subtle thing.  A far cry from the fist and gun game he usually engaged in with Krycek.  It struck him as very surreal.  And he didn’t even have his own weapon trained on him this time.  He was going soft.

Krycek’s jaw firmed.  “Not non-existent, Mulder, I…”  His gaze dropped to Mulder’s floor.  He gritted his teeth and spoke through them.  “You saved him and you don’t even remember it.”

Mulder took an involuntary step forward, his ideas shifting, his very beliefs right now existing on a faultline.  If Krycek knew that and was just…  But he had to…he just had to know.  “Was I mindwiped?”

Krycek swallowed, his Adam’s apple lifting.

“I just assumed…”  Mulder added.

Krycek had come here and given over his gun.  He’d turned on the stove light.  He wanted to be found.  He’d made sure every ball was in Mulder’s court so far.  The implications were heady, just like last time when Mulder had sat with that gun dangling from his fingers for an hour after Krycek had gone.

Krycek reached into his jacket and Mulder flinched, going for his gun.  But Krycek held out his prosthetic in supplication.  Mulder’s attention dropped to it with a soft frown, and he relaxed his trigger arm.  He watched Krycek withdraw a thin manila envelope.

“What is it?” Mulder asked.

“The classified record of your visit to Wiekamp.  A detailed description of what happened…of the rescue and then of what they did to you.”

Mulder gasped.  He took the envelope and fairly ripped it open.  He pulled out several papers, scowering them between incredulous glances up at Krycek.  He found phrases like ‘hijacked transportation vehicle’, ‘interrupted transfer of the alien rebel’, ‘abduction scenario’, and his own name followed by a list of medications he’d received with long, horrible names.  ‘…administered by injection prior to a thorough sweep.’  A thorough sweep is what they called it.

It was true…

Son of a bitch, it was true.

“Krycek…”  Mulder started, brain rocketing through the conclusions.

“I’m sorry.”

Mulder caught his breath, the statement so soft as to barely carry over the loud hum of his fishtank.  “What?”

“I should have gone with you,”  Krycek rumbled.  “It wasn’t part of my orders, but…”  He clenched his fist.  “Fuck, I should’ve gone anyway.”  He speared Mulder with a look.  “I’m sorry, Mulder.”

Mulder found himself nodding.  And taking another step forward.

“Sit down,” he said without inflection, though his emotions were tumbling.  What was surreal before just passed the torch to Krycek’s apology for the honors.  Mulder hoped…yes, hoped…that he wasn’t, once again, being played.

They sat on opposite ends of the couch, Mulder unable to let go of the hard evidence in his hands.

“It won’t be enough,”  Krycek said, cutting off his thoughts of senate review, emergency Presidential press conferences, and the like.  “The real evidence is the rebel and he’s gone.  Thanks to you,” he added sincerely.

Mulder laid the papers down on his coffee table.  His gaze was drawn to how Krycek’s false left arm was held at a slant at his side, unnatural and unmoving.  Mulder had never thought before that the body, itself, could breathe.  Until he saw it so still.

“Did somebody order you to bring these to me?” Mulder asked, gesturing toward the documents.

“No.”

“Are you here against orders?”

Krycek shook his head.  “I’m just not here,” he replied with a crooked, almost sad-looking grin.

“Why?”  Mulder asked, hating how it felt to seek any kind of truth from Krycek, not knowing if he was going to get it or know if he didn’t.  He pushed on.  “Why are you here?  To bring me this?”  To apologize?, he added silently.

Krycek took a shaky breath.  “I knew you wouldn’t trust me without it.”

Mulder’s eyebrows rose.  So it wasn’t even really the reason?  It was just a ploy?  Was even the confession designed to engender trust?  Mulder hated the nausea that plagued his stomach as the questions rounded his mind, caught.

Mulder glanced at the arm again.  That was certainly real.  Way too fucking real.

“Why do I need to trust you, Krycek?” he asked.

The man sitting with him breathed deeply, his lashes fluttering like some pre-pubescent girl.  “Because it’s here.”  He swallowed.  “Colonization.”

Mulder sat up a little straighter, a deep unease running the length of his body, settling painfully in his gut.  And he was shocked and a little horrified that it was accompanied by a strange little thrill of excitement.

“What do you mean…it’s here.”

Krycek swallowed.  “I mean…the timetable has shifted.”  Mulder moved closer as Krycek spoke, riveted.  “Everybody’s racing around to catch up.”  He blinked.  “They’re coming Mulder.  Now.”

Mulder dropped his gaze to the couch between them.  “Jesus.”  Then he looked back to Krycek.  “What about the resistance?”

“They’re gathering…mobilizing.  But even they are unprepared.  Their primary mission has been to take out the abductees.  Now, that’s not enough.”

Mulder frowned over at him, thinking fast and feeling a little queasy.  Rollercoaster queasy.

“The vaccine?” he asked.

“The group has one,”  Krycek husked.  “And it works.  But mass inoculation was never in their plans.  They’re all just falling all over one another to vaccinate themselves at this point.  No one has a plan.”

Mulder’s eyes narrowed.  Then he stifled a gasp.  “Except you,” he whispered, the dawning comprehension nearly making him tremble.

Krycek‘s half-smile was answer enough.  His eyes looked almost blue underneath the sheen of moisture hanging there.  Never falling, never committing…like liquid conscience.

Mulder nodded, trying to keep his breath even.  Still, he felt light and dizzy.

“I…”  Krycek began, dropping his blinking gaze.  “I came here to…”  He looked like a kid again.  The one Mulder used to like.  He looked nervous and real.  Not some archetypal anti-hero cloaked in leather and lies and with a serpent tongue so smooth under its script that you find yourself aching to believe what you know to be, at best, tainted truth.  “I came to you…because…”

“What do you need?”  Mulder asked, surprised by the steady calm in his own voice.  He supposed when you make a choice that big, it’s just a relief.

He watched Krycek gasp as the other man’s eyes sought his.  The crinkle over his nose bunched up in defense.  Mulder held the eye contact, unflinching.  Krycek appeared speechless.  Mulder’s eyes swept over his face…the crow’s feet framing his eyes now, the tight jawline, smooth as a boy’s.  Krycek’s lips…parted now.  Then the eyes again, and beneath them…into them…into the other man.

“Isn’t that why you came here?”  Mulder asked him.

Krycek hesitated on another small inhale.  Then he nodded.

Mulder felt the dissolution of who they’d been.  He’d felt it even before, when Krycek had come to him with information on the rebel.  It was like a brush with the future.  He’d sat on his couch and thought about it after he’d gone.  What had he told Scully?  ‘Destiny, fate…how to throw a curve ball…’  All of it had been Alex Krycek.  He’d felt nearly elated when he’d shown her the note and not let on about its deliverer.  He’d felt like he was keeping an illicit secret.  He’d felt reinvested.  And Krycek had given him that.  No one else.

So it was something that had been sitting inside him since.  Something getting ready.  Ready for this.  Ready for now.

“So,” he said to the other man now.  “What’s the plan?”

………

Two months.

He’d had no idea.

They had precious little time.  And Mulder had quickly come to understand that he could no longer jerk himself off with his other cases.

No more werewolves.  No more Big Blue.

It could only be this now.  It was his life.  This was what he’d been getting ready for since he could remember.

The day he resigned felt like a funeral and a graduation.  He handed over the paper…just one measly sheet with his name at the bottom.  Like offering his corpse, the shell of his body, to the old gods in sacrifice.  Agent Mulder had to die so that another could live.

The same day that he’d walked out of the Hoover building in a nicely pressed suit, he went home, changed into jeans and a leather jacket, and promptly left there, too.  He walked out of his life.  Left it in boxes, what he hadn’t had moved to headquarters.  Scully would sell it for him, or burn it, or keep it.  He didn’t know and couldn’t care.  This was it.  The beginning of Who He Was.

Scully had been in tears, but she hadn’t let them fall.  She’d been angry.  Because of Krycek.  She’d let it be known that she didn’t trust him and didn’t think Mulder should. She couldn’t work with him, she said.  He didn’t know what to say.  He didn’t know why he was trusting Krycek.  He only knew that he was.  And that he did.

Scully didn’t understand why he had to leave the Bureau.  Mulder didn’t tell her that a lot of it was that division:  her mistrust of Krycek and the fact that he’d be living a double life between the two of them.  He told her all the other reasons such as the fact that he just wasn’t going to be doing anything but this.  He explained that he had no time nor interest for anything else any more and that if Skinner sent down a case for them to work…he’d have to quit anyway or be fired because he wouldn’t not do this for anything.  There would be no time out and no nine to five schedule.

The other reason he didn’t feel like he could share with her was just this overwhelming feeling of…need.  Like he had to do this for whatever reason.  Like it wasn’t even entirely his choice.  Not his in the small picture sense, but in the big picture one, like something he decided upon before he was even born.  He was scared to tell her that he had faith in this decision.  He was scared of it himself.

He left without her blessing and it ate at his heart.

He met with the Brit.  Shook his hand.  It had been strangely ceremonial, with Krycek looking on as if he was entering into a fraternity.  He supposed he was.

He’d been handed a vial…the vaccine.  Just given to him, like a ring.  He wondered who was Frodo and who was Sam. The old guy was clearly Gandalf.  He would have smiled if it didn’t all feel so real.  So deadly, apocalyptically real.

The Brit left with the air of someone who’s been doing this sort of thing for centuries.  Someone who knows their place.  Mulder had looked at Krycek, then, a still, silent presence, so different than the sweating, kinetic force he had been in Mulder’s past.  Their roads had converged.  He was looking in a mirror at the reflection of himself in shadow.

They got to work then.  First on security.  It was a pretty vast, empty office space with a warehouse next door that the Brit had converted to barracks.  The outside of the office was non-descript in the extreme, the least of its functions to draw attention to itself.  It was situated off the beaten path, out of the way and away from prying eyes.

Mulder and Krycek did most of the security themselves, with some consultation from the Gunmen.  But the footwork and the hardware…it was all them.  Mulder got to work amassing the essentials, buying it all with Krycek’s endless stream of cash.  It seemed to come out of nowhere.  He guessed it must be from the Brit’s pocket.  Mulder made it a point to discuss their funds and soon.  Not just how much but where it all was and who had access and when.  Not where it had come from.  That he knew and it couldn’t matter anymore.

Mulder would bring back computers, wiring, panels, odds and ends that he really didn’t see a need for.  But Krycek knew.  He put it all together, a quiet, industrious presence to Mulder’s bustling one.  Mulder drove, Mulder bought, Mulder hunted and gathered.  Krycek assembled.  Krycek made of their office a fortress.

Mulder had no idea how he knew all that he knew, but he watched, fascinated as Krycek took all the pieces Mulder brought him on recommendation of the Gunmen and Krycek’s own freaky list of electronics and created, from scratch and with his bare hand and prosthetic, a beautiful, efficient system.  Their watchdog.  Something to protect them while they worked to destroy the destroyer.

Mulder had wondered why Krycek insisted on putting it all together himself, but steadily Mulder figured it out that he just didn’t trust anybody else, not really even the Brit.  That and Krycek couldn’t delegate worth a shit.

“Where’d you learn to do that?” Mulder had asked once as Krycek bent over a small, chrome panel and tweaked at some wires.  Mulder was eating a sub sandwich after having spent half the day driving around town picking up parts from weird guys named Malachi or people in hoods standing furtively around in alleys.  In short, the Gunmen’s friends.  Krycek had left his sandwich untouched in favor of finishing his project.

“Almost have it,”  he’d muttered, frowning down at his exposed circuits.

Now he looked at Mulder.  “Here and there,” he answered.

The walls were not yet even close to down.  Mulder knew that.  His own were unstable now, the distrust melting away to puddle at his feet.  But there were still times when he reacted from his old programming and not from what his heart was telling him.  Incremental.  It had to be.  They’d been too much to each other.  Each other’s bad memories.

Mulder just nodded and finished his lunch.  He decided to try his hand at putting together the cabinet their kitchen items were going to be stored in.

Nobody had mentioned sleeping arrangements, and Mulder found his mind drifting to that as he hammered.  Right now, Mulder was staying in an obscure motel and Krycek was sleeping on the floor in a smaller room off the main one in the back, the space probably having been a manager’s lair at one time.

It wasn’t just their office.  It was going to be their home.  His and Krycek’s.  Mulder had been told in no uncertain terms that it would be wise to looks for new digs.  It wouldn’t matter if nobody knew he was working with Krycek.  There were so many sides now, all jockeying for position and trying to oust each other while vying for authority and power that his heretofore sacred position as Fox Mulder, Future-Martyr-So-Don’t-Touch-Him no longer held the weight it once did.  He needed to disappear into the woodwork for a while.

When Krycek had suggested a headquarters of sorts, more than suggested;  insisted,  Mulder had found the idea titillating.  And that was before he knew Krycek was going to be shacking up there as well.

“Can’t be too careful,” was Krycek’s reason.  And from how he talked about it, it was just another move to him.  One of many he was used to making.  Mulder was having to adjust his life much, much more.  And though Krycek never gave him shit about it, he wasn’t exactly sympathetic either.  Mulder had found himself wanting to call Scully.  But he didn’t know that it wouldn’t be a horrible idea this soon after his exodus.  As Mulder bought himself a bed and some sheets at the closest furniture store he could find, he felt alone and scared.  He bought himself a lamp, also, and a little stereo, portable with a CD player.

He drove back to headquarters in Krycek’s Expedition, the bed fitting snugly in the back. He found himself checking the ashtray solemnly, even though he knew the Smoker to be somewhat out of the picture, tucked away in Canada, Krycek had informed him.  Not to mention…that had all been a long time ago.  Still…

When he arrived, it was to Krycek finishing up the system.  He stopped to help Mulder haul the bed into the building.  Mulder looked at him for a minute before they wrestled the contraption out of the truck.

“On three?”  Krycek asked from inside the SUV, one side of the bed braced on his left arm, and Mulder just stared at him.  “Mulder?”

“Uh, yeah,”  Mulder finally answered and they carried his bed through the office space and back into one of two smaller rooms.  They didn’t talk about it;  they just went there.  It was unspoken that that was going to be Mulder’s room and the other door just six feet over was Krycek’s.

“It’s up,”  Krycek informed him, dusting his hand off on his jeans.  Mulder didn’t have to ask what.  It was all Krycek had been working on for days.

“Show me,”  Mulder said.  Krycek looked at him for a moment before nodding, running a hand through his hair as he ducked his head and led the way out of Mulder’s new bedroom.

“And this is the code for shutting it up if you ever happen to accidentally set it off,” Krycek told him after about a ten minute dissertation on how their security system worked.  “And I’ve got…”  He dug in his pocket, licking his bottom lip.  Mulder cleared his throat and looked away, studying the instrument panel.  “A remote,” Krycek finished, holding it out to him.

Mulder looked back and took it, an impressed smile transforming his face as he admired the cute little device in his hand.  “Nifty,” he declared, turning it over.

Krycek smiled when Mulder looked back up at him.  “Totally,” he said, and Mulder’s smile began to fade as he really looked at the man in front of him.  A man.  Not a monster.  A man who liked electronic gadgets and said words like totally.  Krycek lost his smile, too, and proceeded to tell Mulder how the remote worked, moving in closer to point at all the buttons as Mulder’s thumb brushed over them.

They both avoided discussing the fact that Mulder was moving in and tonight would be the first time they both slept there.  Mulder continued bringing stuff in, his new purchases, plus some boxes he’d had with him in the motel.  Just some of his stuff he knew he couldn’t live without.  Krycek had given him a judgmental look at seeing the five big boxes, and Mulder had firmed his jaw in response.   The aliens could full-well colonize for all he cared if he didn’t have this shit.  That’s how he felt.  So they stayed.  And now they went into his room, set down in the dust and dirt Mulder had yet to sweep up.

By contrast, he’d wandered past Krycek’s room when the other man wasn’t looking and the place was spotless.  A yoga mat lay unassuming in one corner with an Aztec throw over it, and that was basically it.  Still, Mulder wondered how Krycek would react to having those two items removed from his existence.  His guess was that it probably wouldn’t be good.  Mulder decided to bring them up if ever Krycek actually gave him any shit about his own boxes of belongings.

Mulder was unpacking some things and lining them up in a curious manner along the floor and on the one, small bookshelf he’s found that he liked and that would fit in the truck with the bed when he realized the sun was going down and his stomach was growling.

He came out of his room to find Krycek hooking up their computers, both their old ones and two that were new, lining them up on the long desk/table Krycek had brought in. Then he realized he had no idea how this was going to work.  Dinner.  Seemed as monumental and difficult as defeating the alien colonists.

Krycek looked up at him briefly but then turned his attention back to the CPU in front of him without a word to Mulder.

Mulder shrugged to himself and walked over to the little area that was going to serve as a kitchen for them.  Just because they were going to live here together and work here together didn’t mean they had to act like roommates.

He opened the door to the freezer and extracted one of this TV dinners, ripping the plastic away from the potatoes as it instructed and popping it in the microwave.

He stood in front of it, staring at the rotating tray through the glass as his dinner cooked.

“Not concerned with microwaves, Mulder?” Krycek’s voice came from across the room.

Mulder turned with a small gasp.  “What?” he asked.

“Microwave radiation,” Krycek answered, standing and coming over to the kitchen area himself.

Mulder looked back in the direction of the microwave, not wanting to watch Krycek nearing.  It was too weird.  He itched to draw a gun, even though he was reasonably sure Krycek didn’t set this all up just to ensnare Mulder and kill him.  The man was warning him about microwave radiation for God’s sake.

He watched out of the corner of his eye as Krycek opened the freezer door himself and extracted something.  Mulder very badly wanted to see what it was, but he didn’t dare look.

The other man walked around behind him and Mulder heard the soft ripping of cardboard.  Then Krycek was standing next to him, about two feet away, at the toaster.

Waffles.  He had waffles.

Krycek was going to eat waffles.  Mulder was going to see Krycek eat waffles.  Mulder concentrated on the diminishing numbers and forced himself not to smile with child-like anticipation.  He covered his mouth and pulled at his lower lip.

“I’ve always assumed I’d die in a much more interesting fashion,” Mulder stated, watching the plastic plate turn slow circles.

Krycek snorted beside him.  “Like choking on overly-processed roasted turkey parts?”

Mulder snorted back, crossing his arms and turning an incredulous gaze on Krycek.  “Eggo’s aren’t exactly fine dining, Krycek,” he retorted.   Krycek shrugged noncommittally.  Mulder’s dinner dinged and he popped open the door, reaching for the steaming plate.

“Careful!” Krycek boomed beside him.

Mulder jumped.  “Jesus, what?!”

“It’s hot,” Krycek explained, his voice much softer and a disgruntled frown creasing his face as he studied his own toasting food in front of him.

Mulder felt a smirk coming.  What was with him?  He really seemed concerned with Mulder’s physical safety.  What a joke.  Like either one of them had ever gone out of their way for the other one.  Well, since they were partners.  But that was different.  And since Krycek’s stunningly perfect betrayal, Mulder had spent a significant amount of time actually trying to do the other man a good deal of bodily harm.  What was Krycek’s problem?  Did he think Mulder was actually going to believe that he cared that much?  About a steam burn?

Mulder would have laughed, but he frowned instead, reaching for a towel and taking his too-hot food out of the microwave and walking away from the scowling man waiting for his waffles.

He sat in one of the two desk chairs.  They didn’t have a living area set up for themselves.  Mulder realized, he didn’t really feel like he needed one.  TV, yes.  Homey space…not really.  He settled the ‘turkey parts’ on the desk in front of one of their huge new monitors and soon heard Krycek’s waffles pop up.

He heard Krycek rustling and couldn’t help his own immense curiosity, turning to watch how a one-armed assassin-turned electrician-turned dubious partner fixed his waffles.  He watched, rapt, as Krycek smeared the two with butter and a light dollop of syrup, then forwent silverware to sandwich the two together.

“Huh…”  Mulder wondered out loud.

Krycek’s suspicious gaze shot to his, his waffle sandwich halfway to his mouth.  “What?”

Mulder looked at him for a minute before declaring, “It’s just cool.”

Krycek frowned at him a moment more and Mulder nodded to the waffles.  “Dripping.”

Krycek looked down just in time, seeing the melting syrup and butter and turning the sandwich in his hand, catching the drip in his mouth and taking a bite.

Mulder swallowed a little hard and turned his attention back to his own dinner.

Soon, Krycek came over, licking at his messy concoction, and Mulder tried not to look up as Krycek sat in the other chair to finish eating.  Mulder decided they needed some conversation or this situation was going to become even weirder than it already was.

Plus, every hour of their lives now was on the clock.  There would be little rest from now on.  In a way, it was a dream come true for Mulder.  No more leaving work to go home and sulk.  Work was home.

“Which city is first?” Mulder asked, barely swallowing his bite as he got the question out.

“I thought this one,” Krycek answered, having taken the time to chew and swallow himself.  “D.C.”

Mulder nodded.

“You and I can handle that,” Krycek continued.  “And Danny can do New York.  He’s there finishing the mass production anyway.”

“Danny?”  Mulder asked.  Had Krycek not heard of Trust No One?

“He’s another one with the Brit.”  Krycek studied his face for a moment, taking his last bite and licking his fingers and thumb.  Mulder looked away.  “I’m not the only one, you know.”  He cleared his throat.  “After he took me off the ship in New York…before I came to you,” Krycek went on.  “He told me of his plan.  To amass an army.  Using rescued test subjects from Tunguska.”

Mulder’s eyebrows rose.  “Has he?”  Mulder couldn’t help but think of the man in the cell next to his...the geologist.  He’d never known the man’s name.  Didn’t know if he’d survived.

Krycek nodded.  “He’s got men there now.  There was an overthrow the night you rescued the rebel.”

“How many?”  Mulder asked in a near whisper.

“Two…three hundred men,” Krycek answered, leaning back in his chair.  “They should be returning as we speak.”

Mulder sat in silence, taking it in, his food forgotten.  Three hundred rescued men, all having their own grievance, their own horrible history with the alien virus.  To have the chance to fight it…to be a force in taking it down…  What better army could one recruit?

“So was it the Brit’s idea to use the vaccine in the water supply?” Mulder asked.

Krycek looked at him steadily.  “No.  It was mine.  But he liked it,” Krycek finished with a small smile.

Mulder nodded.  Perfect.  All of them already vaccinated.   Angry, vengeful, disempowered Russians, coming to fight with them.

Mulder felt suddenly uneasy.  “They’re not…slaves…are they?”  Mulder asked, afraid of the answer.

Krycek leaned forward.  “No.  They’re volunteers.  There were some…many who chose to go back to their families.  But many don’t have families anymore.  And only about fifty declined to join the movement.”

“Wow…” Mulder breathed.

“But it will take time to get them ready,” Krycek continued.  “For a while, maybe a month, it’ll be tight.”

“How many?  Just us?”

“Us, Danny, a handful of others.  But yeah.  Mainly just us.”

Mulder swallowed.  When he’d agreed to come on board with Krycek’s plan to vaccinate the major cities through infiltrating water supply plants, he’d assumed it would just be them, and he’d had no idea how it was ever going to work.  They were working against the clock.  All they really had on their side was money, the Brit’s ability to fully fund such a large and fast-moving project, and access, also procured by their ally.

And they had Mulder’s passion.  And Krycek’s determination.

Whether or not it was possible, Mulder knew they had to try.

He nodded again now, turning back to his dinner and taking a bite of rather unsavory cooling mashed potatoes.

“Can we trust those friends of yours?” Krycek asked, swiveling slowly in his chair, thoughtful.

“The Gunmen?  Definitely.  Wanna bring them in?”

“Think they’d enjoy a mid-winter trip down to Miami?” Krycek replied by way of answer.

Mulder smiled mischievously.  “Hell yeah.  All those bikinis?”

Krycek swiveled a little bigger and returned the crooked smile.  “Why don’t you call them and I’ll get these guys up and running,” he suggested, gesturing to the computers.

“They gonna be networked?” Mulder inquired.

“What else?”

They split up to accomplish their different tasks, but Mulder paced with the phone only about twenty feet away, so he snuck looks over at his companion from time to time, noticing that he’d changed to a T-shirt at some point and was under the desk and fiddling with cords.  His legs were long, Mulder noticed.  And he’d taken his boots off.  He was barefoot.  Barefoot.  It seemed somehow…extraordinary.

“Hey.  Mulder,” Frohike demanded.

“Yeah?”

“I asked you about South Beach, dude.”

They’d finished discussing the technical details.  The ones they could discuss at this point.  Anything else would necessitate a meeting.  Now, apparently, they were on to the perks.

“I dunno.  It may be pretty last minute.”

“Well, do what you can.  We have faith in you.”

Mulder heard Langly yell in the background something about a hacker convention in Jacksonville on the 23rd.  “Shut up, dipwad, this is the alien invasion,” Frohike chided.  “Sorry, Mulder.  We’ll do ya proud.  We promise.”

But Mulder was watching Krycek crawling out from under the desk, leaning on his prosthetic and grunting a little.

“Yeah, I know,” he told his friend.  “We’ll be in touch,” he added before he hung up.

“They wanna know how much they’ll be paid?” Krycek asked, reaching around behind a monitor and fingering yet another cord.

“They wanna know if they’ll stay in a place with free HBO,” Mulder clarified.

Krycek screwed something into place and then booted up.  “All set,” he told Mulder.  He ran a hand through his hair again, sending it into short, up-standing spikes.  Mulder noticed that his fake arm was jointed, bent a little at the elbow now.

“Good,” he murmured absently.  He dropped his attention to the floor and tried to find something interesting to look at.  Unfortunately, his partner was the most interesting thing in the room.  “Is there anything else we need to go over tonight?” he asked.  He felt both hope and apprehension bloom through his body.

“It’s been a long day,” Krycek sighed.  “It’s late.  If you wanna…”

Mulder nodded.  “I thought I’d get my TV set up,” he said.

“You brought your TV?” Krycek asked.  Mulder wasn’t sure if there was a hint of superiority there or not.  “There’s no cable,” Krycek finished.

“I brought rabbit ears,” Mulder replied.  “It…” he began, blushing unaccountably.  “It helps me sleep.”

After a short silence, he peered up at Krycek.  The other man’s expression was unreadable.  Mulder sighed, averting his eyes again, and stalked out of the room.  He didn’t know if he should say good-night or not.  The whole thing just seemed too bizarre.

He retired to his room to watch his TV and try to forget that Krycek was in the next room.  He got the antennae perched on top and made his new bed, propping the pillows up against the wall so he could sit up a little.  He didn’t get undressed.  He looked at his watch.  After one in the morning.

He found a sitcom, needing the background laughter to help his mind to a better place.  He found himself thinking about all those men on a boat from Vladivostok.  Some would be sick.  Some would be nearly dying, wouldn’t they? He sighed and flipped channels, finding a better fit.  Looked like a rerun of Roseanne.

He was also deadset on meeting this Danny.  He didn’t know why he felt so strongly about it.  He just wanted to know who it was that was going to be helping them.  His intuition wasn’t balking exactly.  Just letting him know that this was something to pay attention to.

His thoughts raced back and forth for more than a couple hours, careening from the Brit, to thoughts of  Skinner’s shocked face as he’d handed over his resignation, to trying to remember what the code for the alarm was again, to Krycek’s bare feet.

After thinking about them for some time, he was sleeping.  It hadn’t once occurred to him to feel unsafe.

………

He woke early on a bad dream.  He shook it off.  It wasn’t one of the really horrible ones.  It was one he had a lot.  Lots of monkeys.

To his surprise, Krycek was already in the bathroom and showering when he got up.  He cursed beneath his breath, having to take a piss really bad.  He busied himself, scratching his ass through his wrinkled jeans and underwear that had ridden up into some places, and he started some coffee.  He rifled through the little cabinet beneath the coffee maker Krycek had set up.  He found a bag of grounds.

Arabian Mocha Java.  Decaf.

Shit.

He heard the bathroom door open.  “Krycek, we gotta get…”  He turned, holding up the bag, to see Krycek coming out of the bathroom, holding a towel around his waist.  He was nearly naked and dripping wet.  And one-armed.  No prosthesis.  Mulder found himself tilting his head and looking.  He wanted to turn away.  He wanted to give the man some privacy, but…  He just couldn’t.

“Get what?” Krycek grumbled.

“Just…”  Mulder held up the bag.  “Better coffee,” he said.

Krycek scoffed, seeming unconcerned with his state of dress.  “Better?”

“Well…”  Mulder went on, finally dropping his gaze.  “Caffeinated.”  His breathing was beginning to get a little ragged.  It had been a long time since he’d found another man physically attractive like he was finding Alex Krycek right now.  And probably longer since he’d had actual sex with another person.  He turned back to the coffee maker as Krycek grumbled again, inarticulately, and closed the door to his room.

Okay.

Unexpected.

He could certainly recall finding him good-looking when they were partners before.  Pleasing to the eye.  And that sweet act had gone over well.  But he hadn’t ever…  He just didn’t…  Well, naked had never been something Krycek had been in front of Mulder.  It was natural to react to the nude male body.  Wasn’t it?  Okay, not completely nude, but Mulder’s mind was doing a damn good job of supplying the missing parts.  Yeah.  Natural.  Even if the semi-nude male alluded to had hurt you countless times?  A beautiful body was a beautiful body.

Mulder took a deep breath and started the coffee, grabbing up some clothes from his room and retreating to the bathroom himself while it brewed.

It had just been too long.  That was all.  Frohike could probably get him in the sack right now.  Yeesh.  Okay, not him.  Mulder rinsed the shampoo out of his hair and tried to banish it all from his mind.  There was no doubt that they had much more important things to deal with right now.  He sobered drastically remembering the short period of time they had to essentially save the world.

He came out serious and dressed.  Krycek looked to be in a similar condition.  Mulder poured some of the coffee and had to grudgingly admit that it was quite tasty.

“Mmm,” he grunted, holding up his mug.

Krycek sipped around a told-you-so grin.

“Better wake me up, though.  I can’t stop aliens when I’m groggy,” Mulder added.

The day was spent planning, making phone calls to both the Brit, who Mulder learned was actually Phillip Townsend --  (Not really, but it was his preferred alias.)  --  and to Danny in New York.  Mulder listened intently to their conversation as he pretended to go through files.

“Yeah…”  Krycek sounded all business, nothing unusual in his tone and nothing to give away what they were talking about.  “Are you sure?  …  Yeah, he’s here.”  A little glance at Mulder and then Krycek turned away.  “Sounds good.  …  Yeah, we will.  All right.  You, too.  Bye.”  Krycek hung up and turned to Mulder, who turned to his files and got them in some kind of order.  He still had a funny feeling but didn’t know why.

“He’s nearly done with the first batch.  It’ll be shipped down here tomorrow and we can start,” Krycek told him.

They went over schematics for the water plant with Krycek describing the system and how they were going to get the vaccine into the tanks.  Townsend was going to help out with gaining entry.  Krycek assured him it wouldn’t be a problem, but Mulder was thinking that his FBI badge could have come in handy.

“You had to,” Krycek reminded him, seeming to read his thoughts, reminding him of that fated feeling he’d made the decision on.  They were sitting in their desk chairs, pushed together so that they could both see the blueprints.  Krycek’s eyes glittered at him under their thick, black lashes.  Mulder nodded.  Then he leaned back.

Around six, Krycek said he was going out to get some groceries.  Mulder dug around in his wallet and pulled out two twenties, but Krycek just frowned at him and shook his head.  Mulder frowned, too, but put his money away.

“How much money do you have, Krycek?”  Now was as good a time as any, Mulder thought.

Krycek looked in his wallet.  “About three hundred.”

“I meant…all together.”

“Oh,” Krycek replied.  He looked down, looked at the computer screen saver…anywhere but at Mulder.  “It’s uh…pretty much unlimited,” Krycek replied.  “I have my own money, but we’ll be using Townsend’s for pretty much everything.”

Mulder just nodded slowly.  “That’s what I figured,” he said.

“I’ll get you a card,” Krycek told him.

“Nordstrom’s?” Mulder asked.

Krycek snorted and smirked at him.  “Yeah.”

Mulder returned it with a crooked smile and headed toward his bedroom.  “Get some sunflower seeds, huh?”

After that evening, they didn’t talk about it again except for Krycek to give Mulder his own card and PIN number as promised so that he could make withdrawals on the bottomless account as well.

Krycek fixed spaghetti that night for their dinner.  They ate at the desk again with Krycek perusing his email at the same time until Mulder demanded his attention.

“Krycek.  This is good.”

Mulder didn’t know what made him say it.  Except that it was true.  Lotta garlic, crammed with mushrooms and onions and black olives.  He didn’t even have to salt it.

“Thanks,” replied Krycek, his voice pitched even lower and more smoky than usual.  He seemed uncomfortable with the compliment.

Mulder shrugged and chewed a big bite.  “You always sleep on a yoga mat?”

Krycek looked at him skeptically and it was enough to make Mulder smile around his bite of food as he waited for the answer.

“No,” was the short answer.

Mulder nodded as if this was enough.  “You do yoga, Krycek?”

The other man had turned his attention to his plate.  “Sometimes.”

Mulder nodded thoughtfully again.  “I took you for a Pilates man,” he threw out, just being a brat now for goading him.  It was good-natured, though.  He found he didn’t want things to feel stressed between the two of them.  It was ironic.  When at first he’d agreed to this arrangement, he’d feared he wouldn’t be able to handle it, wanting to beat the shit out of Krycek at every turn and going around feeling angry and bitter.  But he didn’t.  He was too excited about what they were doing.  And Krycek hadn’t done anything yet to piss him off.  It was kind of amazing.

Krycek had said something under his breath that Mulder didn’t catch.  “Excuse me?”

“Tai Chi,” Krycek rumbled.  “I do Tai Chi a lot.”  Then he spared Mulder a sideways look, blushing a little.  It spread out to his temples, which Mulder noticed were ever-so-slightly greying.  Huh.  The kid wasn’t a kid anymore.  He was struck by the absurd way that time had proceeded almost in spite of them.  It seemed like the days of hair gel and suck ups weren’t all that far back.

Mulder remembered vividly that long, muscled body he’d glimpsed that very morning.  Time, in a very odd way, had been rather kind to Krycek.  The arm was the glaring exception to that and its loss had little to do with time.  It wasn’t as if one just lost limbs with age after all.  And Mulder found it more…intriguing…than anything.  It marked him as supremely different, wonderfully other.

They ate without conversation then, Krycek deleting several emails from his inbox and then standing up to take his plate to the little sink.  Mulder stood, too, and offered to do the dishes.  Krycek frowned at him again for no particular reason that Mulder could discern, but then nodded, saying that he was going to work on getting the few people he knew and could trust to the other large cities within the next several days.  He was on the computer and the phone until a late hour.  When Mulder had finished with the dishes, he’d gone into his bedroom with the blueprints, turning on some soft music and studying them some more, jotting some things down in a notebook from time to time.

He lost track of time, and when he returned to the main area it was to find Krycek gone and his bedroom door shut.  So no good-night again.  Mulder frowned, feeling a little foolish for even being bothered by it.  He got a drink of water, took a long, luxurious piss, and then went to bed, unable to fall asleep even with the TV on for some time.

……….

The next day was a complete blur.  He got up before Krycek and promptly took a jog.  When he returned, Krycek was in the living room on the phone and pacing.  When he hung up, he told Mulder, “It’s here.  Let’s go.”

Mulder quickly exchanged his sweats for jeans and slung his jacket on.  They went to the pick-up site and gave the deliverer an insane amount of money.  Then he and Krycek drove the delivery truck to a place specified by the Brit who met them there.  They went over the plan and the schematics one more time and set off to infect D.C.’s water with the vaccine.

Mulder was jazzed.  He was fairly bouncing in the truck as Krycek drove.  He didn’t even care that he wasn’t driving, that’s how great he felt.  He got the sudden urge to call Scully, and that was the one damper on the entire operation.  There was no Scully anymore.  Not in his crazy life.  He’d gotten an email from her the day before with a short, almost impersonal update.  She’d gotten a new partner, an ex-cop from New York.  Kind of a jerk, but smart, she’d written.  She was spending more time in the lab and that seemed to make her happy.

‘Be careful, Mulder,’ it had ended.  ‘Scully.’

At least it sounded like she wasn’t so angry anymore.

He looked out the window at the passing buildings.  It was how it should be.  She wasn’t supposed to do this with him.  It was her off-ramp.

He glanced over at Krycek, the smooth clench of his jaw, his narrowed eyes.  And he felt like smiling.

………

The infiltration went off without a hitch.  He and Krycek seemed to be able to speak with their eyes alone and navigated the facility beautifully, nodding at the doors and conveying oncoming traffic with a short inhalation or a tensing of their bodies.  Whatever it was, the other read it and responded.  They got in, distributed their payload, and then snuck out with no one the wiser.

Mulder insisted on driving the van back to the ditch point where the Brit would be waiting with a car.  The energy was high and even the stalwartly silent and brooding Krycek had to smile a little.

Mulder…he cackled.  “Fuck!” he exclaimed, banging the wheel joyfully.  He caught Krycek’s widening grin before he turned his face to the passenger window.

The Brit picked them up and nodded to his driver to take them home.  His attitude was a little Now-Now-Boys.  Like a dour uncle.  He let them off with a, “Watch.  And wait.”

Mulder and Krycek entered the office and Mulder immediately flung himself into a chair.  “We need a sofa,” he announced to the ceiling.  Then he smiled at Krycek.  “We did it, huh?”

Krycek looked at Mulder from under his lashes.  He nodded.  Then he let that little smile creep over his lips again.  “Yeah,” he husked.  “Yeah, we did.”

Mulder spun the chair.

……..

They had a man in Houston, a woman in Chicago and one in San Francisco, a guy in Los Angeles, one in San Diego, one in Denver, St. Louis, Langly and Frohike in Miami, and Byers covering New Orleans.  Plus the Brit’s Russian army was learning fast and salivating to get some pay back.  They were going to start being deployed into the mid-west and a few more coastal cities like Boston and Portland, Oregon as well as Atlanta, Birmingham, and Phoenix.

They couldn’t cover every base.  But their hope was to vaccinate as many people as they could in as short a period of time as possible and then let the word slip that they’d done it.  If they could inoculate enough of the population, it might make the whole invasion a big waste of the aliens’ time.

Luckily, Townsend had friends in high places over in Europe, India, and China as well.  They were mobilizing and effecting similar projects with the vaccine.  That still left Africa, Australia, and, unfortunately, Russia.  But it was their hope that a severely compromised invasion would be one not worth pursuing.

Mulder and Krycek had been working nearly non-stop for weeks.  They’d flown out to Dallas themselves to administer the vaccine, then caught another plane straight to Detroit.

“So we get all the ‘D’ cities?” Mulder had joked as they rushed to make their connection.

Krycek had smirked.  “You got a problem with my system, Mulder?”

Mulder did not, in fact, have a problem with Krycek’s system.  It was the most excitement he’d had in a very long time.  And Mulder felt good.  Good about what they were doing.  Good about making a difference.  Far from feeling cut off from his FBI access, he felt a freedom from its constraint.  He wore what he wanted, went where he liked, and answered to no one.  Except Krycek.  And Krycek answered to him, too, always keeping him in the loop.

In all honesty, they were great together.

It was a vindication of Mulder’s time with Alex Krycek as his junior partner.  It hadn’t all been a lie…hadn’t all been for shit.  It was real.  They were partners again.  And it was right this time.  Before had just been rehearsal.  This was the performance.

They worked together, quietly planning or shouting at each other in their passion to get something done, or out in the field doing what it was they were put on this earth to do.  They ate together, both preferring Chinese to just about anything, so they got it a lot.  But often Krycek cooked and Mulder cleaned up.  Mulder really liked Krycek’s burrito casserole.  And his omelets.  The man made amazing omelets.

They spent every waking hour together, essentially.  Every once in a while, one or the other would take a trip to the store or out for a new gadget or ‘home improvement’ item of some kind.  But they were out of touch for no more than an hour usually.

One time Krycek was headed out the door just to head over to the Quick-E-Mart for sunflower seeds and Rocky Road ice cream.  Mulder noticed the other man’s cell phone lying on their somewhat new coffee table.  Without getting up from the sofa, Mulder called out, “Hey, Alex!” and tossed the phone at him.

Krycek had been so surprised by the name that he’d nearly not caught the damned thing.  Mulder was taken a little bit aback himself.  It was the first time in a long time that he’d called him Alex.  It had felt good, but he hadn’t done it again.

They were on their way to New York now.  Mulder was finally going to meet this Danny.  The man Krycek had cryptic phone calls to at least once every other day.

They met up at a lab where Danny was apparently working on condensing the vaccine so that a little went a long way.  Mulder entered the room right behind Krycek and a man turned immediately and, seeing Krycek, smiled hugely.

“Alex,” he called, briskly striding over.

Alex.

The man was tall, just an inch or so shorter than he and Krycek.  Mulder lagged behind a little, trying to look around the room, but feeling compelled to watch their greeting.  To his surprise, Danny clasped Krycek’s hand in both of his and just held it, smiling, his eyes twinkling.  He stood too close.  Mulder hated people that did that.  “God, Alex…”  Danny shook his head ruefully.  “It’s good to see you.”

Krycek shot a small shy look Mulder’s direction, then smiled with thinly compressed lips at the third man and answered softly, “Yeah, Danny.  Good to see you.”

Danny’s gaze lifted over Krycek’s shoulder and found Mulder.  “And is this Mulder?”  He let Krycek go, albeit reluctantly it looked like, and Krycek stepped back to let the two men shake hands.

Mulder tried to smile at the man but his face struggled under the weight of it.

“Fox Mulder,” Krycek intoned huskily.  “This is Danny Peterson.”

They shook, with a ‘Nice to meet you,’ from the effusive Danny before the handsome blonde turned back to Krycek.

“Alex, you look…”

Krycek actually ducked his head and a bright blush stole over his face.

“Come on,” Danny said, motioning with his head for them to follow.  “You gotta see my baby.”

His baby turned out to be a giant vat of vaccine.

“Beautiful, isn’t it?” he enthused.

“Jesus,” Krycek breathed, reaching out to run his hand along the stainless steel.  Mulder just nodded, clenching his jaw.

The vat…tank…whatever…really was quite impressive.  It ran the length of one side of the room and they were told it could hold up to thirty thousand gallons of liquid.

“Impressive,” Mulder allowed with a lack-luster smile.

Danny stood close to Krycek as he explained the capacity to them, the pressure on the sides and their problems with its construction.  He was really standing close.  Mulder frowned and stopped listening.

They were taken to a separate room where Danny showed them the computers along with introducing them to some of his ‘team.’  He actually said ‘team.’  Mulder looked around with his arms crossed.

“Coming?” called Danny, and Mulder realized Danny and Krycek were several yards away, standing in a doorway to yet another room and waiting for him.

“Uh, yeah,” Mulder answered.

When he reached the doorway, Krycek was waiting for him with a confused frown wrinkling that spot above his nose.  It made him look cute, Mulder thought.  He was beginning to think Danny would think so, too.  He was beginning to think a lot of things.

About half an hour later when Danny excused himself to take care of a problem one of his ‘team’ was having and he touched his hand to Krycek’s lower back upon parting, Mulder had already decided that they’d been lovers.  He scuffed the toe of his tennis shoe with his other shoe and sulked at the floor.

Lovers.

Danny and Krycek had been lovers.

He should have clued in a long time ago.  Krycek just…sounded different when he talked to this guy.  He actually said good-bye when he hung up from a conversation with him.  And now that Mulder saw Danny…

He was hot, goddamnit!

Mulder shoved his hands into his pockets and looked around the room, avoiding his partner.

“Mulder?” Krycek asked quietly.

“Hmm?”

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothing.”  He felt Krycek staring at him.  “Stop staring at me, dammit, I’m fine.”

Krycek sighed, and soon Danny returned.

They were dragged to lunch where Danny smiled at Krycek a lot and touched his arm.  Mulder fidgeted through it, eating a side salad and water.  He was treated to another questioning frown from Krycek to which he just shrugged, looking out the window as Danny and Krycek ‘caught up.’

It lasted forever, but finally they left, going their separate ways.  Danny took Krycek’s hand again and leaned in to speak softly, though Mulder heard every word, the asshole.

“Maybe if you’re free…we could meet for dinner?”

Krycek swallowed thickly and answered just as quietly.  “Maybe.”

They took a cab back to the hotel where Mulder stormed into the room, going straight to the bathroom and shutting the door hard, running the water for a shower.

His hands went into his hair and his elbows on the lip of the sink.  “Fuck,” he hissed.  Then he stripped his clothes off angrily and got under the spray.  He scrubbed himself ruthlessly, realizing that for some reason he was half-hard.  Probably just because he hadn’t jerked himself off in a week and the last time had been a quickie he’d given himself while Krycek was at the grocery store.

He rinsed himself quickly, his skin an unnatural hue of pink when he emerged from the steaming tub.  He redressed, not feeling any better, and stalked out of the bathroom.  Krycek was standing in the middle of the room, between their two beds.  He turned when Mulder came out of the steam.

“What the hell is wrong with you?”

Mulder was ready for it. “I don’t like him.”  At least he thought he was.

“You…”  Krycek squinted, frowning deeply.  “You don’t like him?  That’s it?”  His voice was an incredulous hiss.

Mulder planted his hands on his hips and faced Krycek across the bed.  “Yeah. I don’t like him.  Okay?  I’m allowed to not like him, aren’t I?”

Krycek threw his hand up in the air and turned away on a snort.  “Sure,” he shouted.  “Don’t like him.  He’s just the only person in New York we can trust.”

“Well, that’s the other thing,” Mulder elaborated, taking a few steps forward.  “I don’t trust him either!”

Krycek turned back to him, looking rather deadly.  “Muh…Mulder!  Why?!”

Mulder huffed, looking at the floor, then he turned his glaring anger back on Krycek.  “He was rude.”

Krycek smiled mirthlessly.  “Rude.”

“Yeah.”

“How was he rude…Mulder.”

“He…”

“Yeah?” Krycek pushed.

Mulder huffed again.  “He…  He stood too close to you!”

Krycek’s eyes widened.  “He…what?”

“And he was always…touching you!”  Mulder’s anger was ringing in his ears.  Tears filled his eyes.  He looked away and then looked back again.

Krycek blinked at him.  Just blinked at him.  Then his voice came out in a whisper.  “Mulder…”  He took a step forward.

“You were lovers, weren’t you?”  Mulder blurted.  “That’s what he was to you?”

Krycek swallowed, lashes working overtime.  He breathed out his answer.  “Yes, but…”

“But what?  That doesn’t prejudice you in his favor?  Alex, I don’t trust him.  And you shouldn’t either!”

“Mulder…”  Krycek fairly panted.  “You’re…”  He took another step, his own eyes gleaming now.  “You’re not…jealous…are you?”

Mulder laughed wetly even as he blinked back his angry tears.  He looked at the floor.  He laughed again.  But he absolutely could not make himself say no.

“I gotta get out of here,” he said, brushing past the other man and grabbing up his jacket.  “Have dinner with him if you want.”  Then he was out the door, shutting it loudly and striding down the hall, shaking.

He got as far as the candy machine and stopped, pacing inside the tiny room.  “Fuck,” he breathed, running a hand through his hair.  “Shit.”

Just then his cell phone rang.  It nearly scared him shitless.  He dug it out of his jacket and looked at the caller ID.

Alex.

He gasped.  And then as if by some biological imperative, he answered it.  “What.”

A breath on the other end, the reception fantastic since he was only just down the hall.  If Alex yelled, he’d probably hear it without the aide of his phone.

Not Alex.  Not to him.  Krycek.  Always and forever, last names.

“I’m not going to go to dinner with him.”  The statement was soft and careful.

Mulder swallowed.  “Why not?  You should.  One night in New York, that’s all you get.  And then the world could end.”

Somebody fucking shut him up.  He leaned his forehead against the vending machine and breathed tightly.

“Mulder…”

“What, Krycek?”

Another sigh.  A long silence.  “Come back.”

Mulder bit his lip.  “Why?”

“I wanna talk to you.”

“You’re talking to me now.”

“I’m not going to dinner with Danny.”

“All right.  Fine.”

“Mulder…”

“What?!”

Silence.  Just their breath.  Mulder thought of Krycek doing yoga.  His long, strong body stretching…a moving statue.  He banged his head on the machine.

“What was that?”

Mulder rolled his eyes.  “Nothing.”

“Mulder…  I don’t want him.”

“Why should I care?”

Softer, “I don’t want him.”

Then Mulder’s silence as he turned his face up to the bright lights flickering in the ceiling.  He closed his eyes.

“Please come back.  We don’t…  We don’t have to talk.  I just…  I’d like you to come back,” Krycek implored him.

Mulder dashed at his irrational tears.  He nodded at no one.  A woman walked past the vending room, slowing but continuing on when she took in the serious, tearful man on the phone. She must think I’m having a tiff with my wife, Mulder thought with a short laugh.

“Mulder?”

He sighed…swallowed past his throat, and his voice came out rough.  “All right.”

Krycek sighed again.

“All right.”  Mulder pushed off the vending machine.  “But I don’t wanna talk.”

“Okay,” Krycek agreed.  “We’ll just order dinner and watch TV.”

Mulder nodded then.  He sniffed.  “All right.”  Then he hung up the phone.  He wiped a hand over his face, taking a deep, careful breath.  He stayed in the little room until he got himself under control.  Then he made the short trek back to their room.

He stopped outside of it.  He raised his hand and knocked.  “It’s me,” he called.  Krycek opened it for him since he’d forgotten his keycard.  He’d’ve been screwed if Krycek had gone out to dinner with his ex.

Mulder breathed deeply and looked up at the man in the doorway.  Krycek stepped back out of his way and let him walk past.  Mulder went directly to his suitcase and pulled out a T-shirt.  He stripped his sweater up over his head and changed, then he sat to take off his tennis shoes.  He sighed.

“Want pizza?” Krycek asked.

Mulder looked at the floor.  “Sure.”

Krycek called for it, getting a large pepperoni with extra cheese.  Mulder’s favorite.  He smiled a little sickly.  Was he being coddled?  He didn’t care.  He’d take it.  He’d had a shitty day.  He just couldn’t wait to get home where things were normal.  Where it was him and Krycek.  Their office, their sofa, their fridge and bathroom and razors on the sink.  Their shared space.  He closed his eyes on how much his life had changed in such a short period of time.

The pizza came during an episode of the Simpsons.  They ate with the pizza box opened on the nightstand between the beds.  Mulder scarfed five pieces since he’d had next to no lunch.  After he was done, he put down the crust and groaned, rubbing his stomach.

“Good?” Krycek asked.

“So good I’m gonna need my stomach pumped,” Mulder answered.  He turned his head and looked at the other man and they shared a small smile.

“I think I’m gonna try to go to sleep early,” Krycek said.

Mulder nodded, relieved to have some of that normal feeling back already.  He listened to the familiar sounds of Krycek brushing his teeth, and Mulder undressed while his partner was in the bathroom, getting down to his shorts and then crawling under the covers.  He turned his light off after Krycek returned, now in just his T-shirt and shorts.  No prosthetic.  Mulder was used to the empty space in and out of the short sleeve now.

They both settled in and Krycek, Mulder noticed, turned away and appeared to fall asleep rather quickly.  Mulder took his time, but when he did sleep, he dreamed of his hand on Alex’s back and Alex smiling up at him beside a gigantic tankful of blue water.

……….

They were quiet on the way home.  Mulder pretended to read SkyLine and Krycek looked out the window, seemingly deep in thought.  Mulder worried at his lip and tried to put his cursed trip to New York out of his mind.  He hoped Krycek could just forget.  Though it seemed unlikely.  Mulder knew he’d been a complete ass.

When they arrived back at headquarters, Krycek offered to make a lite dinner and things felt relatively normal as he proceeded to cook while Mulder checked his email.

Three days went by with no mention of Mulder’s jealous little outburst.  Though he was reminded of it when Krycek had to call Danny for updates.  He was relieved, and embarrassed to be relieved, when the phone calls turned out to be brief, under five minutes each time, and Krycek sounded nothing if not professional.

They concentrated on the work.  The Brit had sent out his preliminary team and six more cities had received the vaccine.  Memphis was next on the list and Mulder and Krycek decided to do that one themselves.  They called the Brit about using his jet on Thursday.

They were going over the game plan over an early dinner with plans to really study the place inside and out once they’d finished stuffing their faces.

“So we’re going in when?  Three am?” Mulder asked around a bite of burrito casserole.  “Jesus, Krycek, this is good,” he moaned.

“Thanks,” Krycek said with a tiny grin.  He was getting better at hearing how scrumptious his cooking was.  Especially on burrito casserole night.  Mulder always became very vocal about how much he liked it, so Krycek had had no choice but to get okay with the compliments.  “Yeah, three.  The plane gets in at ten.  That should give us plenty of time to rendezvous with the tanker.”

“And take a trip to Graceland,” Mulder chimed in, smiling hugely.

“Tourism after the gig, you know that, Mulder,” Krycek reminded him with a bite on its way to his quirking lips.

“You’d deny me the King?”

“Not deny,” Krycek corrected.  “Delay.”

“Buzzkill,” Mulder muttered.

Krycek almost choked.  “Where’d you pick that up, old man?”

“Old?!  Who’s old?  I’m not fucking old!” Mulder insisted.  “*You’re* old,” he added ridiculously.

Krycek laughed, a big, hearty, roar of a laugh really.  “I’m five years younger than you!” he exclaimed.

“Whatever,” Mulder shrugged, shoveling in another cheesy mouthful.  “I’m younger than my years.  And you’re greying at the temples.”  He gestured at Krycek’s head vaguely.

Krycek narrowed his eyes, looking at Mulder sideways for a moment.  “What’s with you and my hair, Mulder?”

Mulder dropped his gaze and shrugged, pushing food around on his plate.

“If we do Graceland before…”  Krycek began, and Mulder fairly beamed.  “It’s Beal Street after.  I’m not leaving without sampling the barbeque.”

“Oh, that’s so a deal,” Mulder grinned, scooping up an enormous bite.

Krycek was smiling and shaking his head when Mulder’s cell phone rang.  Mulder frowned and picked it up, finishing his mouthful.  Nobody ever called him.  Krycek turned serious as well, putting down his fork and looking at Mulder expectantly.

“Scully,” Mulder told him, looking at the ID, still frowning.

Krycek looked away and wiped his mouth, picking up his dish and taking it to the sink.  Mulder waited four rings and then answered.

“M-Mulder.”

“Mulder.  It’s me.”  Scully sounded a little breathless.

Mulder stood up from the couch quickly.  “Scully, are you okay?”

“I’m fine,” she answered.  There was a strange pause and then she asked, “How are you, Mulder?”

Mulder cut a quick glance at Krycek who was running water over his plate.  “I’m good, Scully.”

He heard her take a deep breath.  “Are you?”

Mulder frowned, planting a hand on his hip and staring at the floor.  “Yeah, Scully.  I am.”

Krycek came over and scooped up Mulder’s plate from the coffee table.  Mulder mouthed around a soft whisper, “Thank you.”

“What?” Scully asked.

“Nothing,” Mulder said.  “I was talking to Krycek.”

She laughed sickly.  He didn’t blame her.  It was insensitive.  He could have thanked Krycek later, or not at all.  Krycek didn’t seem to care one way or the other.  Maybe he’d wanted to shove it in her face since he resented the high horse she had perched herself on concerning his alliance with Krycek.  “At least you’re not calling him Alex yet,” she murmured.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” he asked.

She sighed.  He was surprised to hear the pain in her voice.  “Nothing, Mulder.”

He sighed, too, the wind taken out of his self-righteous sails.  “Listen…”  He shot a glance at Krycek who appeared not to be listening.  “I understand why this is hard for you.”

“Do you?” she asked.

“Yeah,” he answered, plopping back down onto the couch again.  “I know you don’t trust him, Scully.  And I know you think I’m being misled.”

A glass banged against the sink and Mulder turned to glance over his shoulder in Krycek’s direction, but Scully was speaking.  He kept his attention on the phone.

“Why didn’t you email me back, Mulder?”

“I’ve been busy.  And I wasn’t sure if you’d want to hear about any of what I’ve been doing anyway.”

“I just wanted to hear that you were okay.  I miss you, Mulder,” she said.

Mulder knew Scully was telling the truth.  To a certain extent.  He also knew she’d given up a great deal of what she wanted in her life in order to work with him, and that she could have all that now.  He knew, and was pretty sure she did, too, that she was better off without him.  At the same time, he knew she genuinely cared about him.

He sighed.  “I miss you too, Scully.”

There was more noise from the kitchen and Mulder focused in on Scully’s voice to hear her reply.

She took a deep breath.  “I’m sorry I called like this.  I’ve just been feeling kind of…unsure…about where we stand.  Can you understand that?”

Mulder took a surreptitious glance in Krycek’s direction.  He let his eyes admire the way his neck curved as he bent his head over his dishes, the sensuous flow of his body.  “Yeah.  I can.”

“I know we should probably have minimal contact,” Scully went on.  “I won’t call like this again.”

He nodded to himself.  A little distance would be good whether or not it was dangerous for them to talk.  “That’s probably for the best,” he said.

There was a long pause.  Then Scully said, “I guess I’ll let you go.”

“Okay, Scully.”

“Please take care of yourself,” Scully pleaded with him.

“Don’t worry about me, Scully,” Mulder said.  “Just take care of yourself.  I don’t want anything to happen to you.”  He sighed, swallowing, uncomfortable with sentimentality but needing to say it.  “You’re important to me.”

Suddenly, Mulder heard a door slam and looked up to see that Krycek was no longer in the kitchen and his bedroom door was closed.  Mulder frowned.

“Bye, Mulder,” Scully sighed.  He could hear the smile in her voice now, and it made him smile as well.

“Bye, Scully,” he said softly, glancing at Krycek’s bedroom door.  He hit end and set the phone down.  He looked at it for a moment and then turned his attention to Krycek’s closed door.

He watched it for some time, frowning a little in thought and biting his lip.  Was he mistaken or was Krycek miffed about something?  No, he hadn’t imagined all that banging in the kitchen nor the fact that he’d slammed his door shut.  Much the same way that Mulder had done several nights ago…over Danny.

My, my.  Krycek was jealous.

Mulder felt a little smile tug at his lips.  He sauntered over toward the door, stopping a few feet short, listening.  There was no sound from inside.  He looked into the sink to see that there was actually a broken glass there.  For some reason, it made him smile bigger.

Alex Krycek.  Jealous.

Of what…their partnership?  Was he threatened by the trust and comaraderie he and Scully shared, in contrast with the fragile bond they were forming?  He probably saw Scully as the biggest threat to what they were building here.  And Mulder had gotten rather…touchy-feely with her on the phone.

Huh.  Well.  His reaction’s perfectly understandable, Mulder thought.

And after New York…a complete relief!  He wasn’t the only one capable of assing out.  He found he was grateful for the fact that Krycek was affected by something.  That he wasn’t alone in wanting…in wanting to protect what they had.

He took the last steps in toward the door.  He knocked.  “Hey, Krycek,” he called.  No answer.  “Krycek…”  Nothing.  “Come on, let’s go over those schematics, huh?”

“Not right now.”

Mulder bit his lip and smiled.  “We really need to do it tonight,” he told the pouting man.

“Not right now, Mulder,” came the impatient reply.  Mulder’s grin was nearly irrepressible but with some effort, he wiped it away and turned the knob on Krycek’s door, opening it and stepping partway inside, intending to push a confrontation by disrespecting his partner’s privacy.

“Krycek, you know we need to…”

His voice died as he caught sight of the other man.  Krycek was in the middle of his room, posed gracefully, in a pair of sweatpants and…nothing else.  His chest was bare and he’d removed the prosthetic.

Krycek dropped the pose with a huff.  “Jesus, Mulder, you can’t just…”

He was turned at an angle to Mulder, what was left of Krycek’s left arm facing him.  Mulder had seen him in T-shirts before and there was that one time he’d seen him holding that towel, but he’d been facing Mulder.  He’d never seen the…stump…from this angle.  And it wasn’t the arm itself that had Mulder’s full attention.

It was the tattoo emblazoned on it.

Mulder gulped down the sudden jolt of arousal.

He couldn’t stop staring at it.  It was a curved strip of black, barbed wire.  Entangled in that, caught and damaged, was a red rose.  And the rose was bleeding, a vivid red drop…another…three dripping from its torn petals.  Dripping down what was left of Krycek’s mutilated arm.

“You barged into my room!” Krycek bellowed.

“You have a tattoo,” Mulder breathed.  Only then did he tear his eyes from it to actually look into Krycek’s angry face.  But the frown there was going from outrage to confusion with every harsh breath.  Mulder saw Krycek’s chest rising and falling, a sheen of sweat glistening on his exposed skin.

He’d interrupted some Tai Chi it appeared.

Mulder thought Krycek was so beautiful it was actually painful to look at him.

His eyes dropped to the tattoo once more.  It shone with sweat as well.  Mulder blinked sluggishly and licked his lips.

“Where’d you get that?” he asked softly, not raising his eyes.  He began moving into the room slowly.

“New York,” Krycek nearly whispered.  He started to turn to face Mulder, but Mulder glanced up at him with a little shake to his head, before resting his eyes on the snared and bleeding rose again, circling the man slightly, coming a little closer.

He squinted at it a little.  “Didn’t it…?”

“Hurt?”  Krycek finished, the edge of irony in his voice.  “No.  It felt good.”

Mulder looked up into Krycek stormy eyes.  He wasn’t being sarcastic.  He meant it.  Mulder swallowed.  He was rock hard.  He stopped, tilting his head and studying the artwork.

“Why a rose in barbed wire?”  He licked his lips.

“I liked it.”  The answer quiet and sort of dangerous.

Mulder had to ask the big question.  “Did you get this…before or…?”  He gulped.

Krycek’s chest seemed to puff up.  “After,” he rumbled.

Mulder’s breath caught and he realized he’d been slowly reaching out, lifting his hand toward it.  Krycek got very still, now not even really breathing, as Mulder’s fingers neared.  But he didn’t back away.  He didn’t say no.  He didn’t strike out.  He just…waited.

Mulder was close.  Too close.  A foot from Krycek’s overly warm body…from the sexy tattoo.  He got it after.  He inflicted this pain on himself after they’d sawed his arm off.

God…

His fingers brushed it.

Krycek inhaled sharply and Mulder stroked across the burning colors once.  His cock throbbed inside his jeans.  He withdrew his fingers, lifting his gaze to Krycek’s.  The green eyes were narrowed at him. Krycek’s breath came in small, quiet pants.

Mulder smiled at him.  “It’s fucking beautiful.”  He blinked and stepped back.  “I’ll let you finish,” he told Krycek.  Then he turned, walking past the other man toward the door.

“Mulder.”  Krycek’s rough voice stopped him.

He looked back, eyebrows raised.

“I’ll be out in a minute.”

Mulder nodded and turned to leave him alone, shutting the door behind him.

He made it to the bathroom, maintaining his cool, but once inside, he let his breath out between pursed lips, squeezing his eyes shut and falling back against the closed door.

“Fuck,” he breathed.  He banged the back of his head against the wood.  “God, why are you doing this to me?” he murmured aloud under his breath.  He pushed off the door and went to throw water on his face.  He braced his hands on the sink and waited for his erection to subside.  It kind of didn’t, and he didn’t want to take the time to jerk off, so he just let it pound insistently inside his jeans.

Thankfully, by the time Krycek came out, Mulder’s dick had deflated significantly all on its own.  He was sipping from a Becks Dark on the couch and surfing their new TV (with cable hook-up, thanks to the guys.  “A little gracias for the sun-tanned senoritas,” Frohike had said upon their return from Florida.).

Mulder had gone back to thinking about Krycek’s reaction to his phone conversation with Scully.  He thought about before that…when he and Krycek had actually been somewhat relaxed together, smiling and joking and even laughing.  Mulder wanted that back again.

He watched Krycek head to the bathroom with a new change of clothes.  He listened to the sound of the shower…the splash of water.  He closed his eyes and thought that if Krycek knew how tense it had sometimes been with Scully, he might not feel so threatened.  Their life as partners hadn’t been idyllic by any stretch.  She challenged him, yes, and they cared for one another.  He loved her.  He really did.

But there were times…God, when he just wanted to wring her little neck.  Maybe he should tell Alex about them.  He smirked trying to imagine that conversation.  Or maybe he should tell Alex about the times she’d flayed his belief…even told him he was going to get his loved ones killed.  No party, that one.

He opened his eyes as the water shut off.  It wasn’t that he wanted to turn Alex against Scully, though.  It was that…

That he wanted to see Alex smile again sometime tonight.

When the other man emerged, dry and dressed in black T-shirt (prosthetic back in place) and blue jeans, scowl firming etched into the corners of his eyes, around his turned down lips…Mulder realized he had his work cut out for him.

He was looking forward to it.

“Hey, Krycek,” he called.

“Huh,” Krycek answered suspiciously, going to the fridge and getting himself a bottle of water.  Mulder watched him stick it between his legs to wrench the cap off.

“There is no God,” Mulder muttered under his breath.  He cleared his throat.  “Grab yourself a beer and get over here,” he yelled over the back of the couch.

“Why?”  Krycek questioned sucking off his water bottle.

“Because Rambo’s on,” Mulder said.

Krycek’s eyes narrowed.  “I thought you wanted to go over the schematics.”

“I do, but I thought this would make for good background.”

Krycek stood there looking at him and blinking.  Then he said, “Which Rambo?”

Mulder smiled.  “The good one.”  Then,  “Get a beer.”

He turned back around and waited, listening to the sound of Krycek thinking and then finally opening the fridge again and closing it before coming over to where Mulder sat and taking a seat beside him.

Mulder had the blueprints scattered all over the table.  He searched underneath for the bottle opener, and when he found it, handed it to Krycek without a word.

They talked easily about the infiltration for about half an hour with Stallone on the tube turned down low.

Mulder finally leaned back against the couch cushions and crossed his ankle over his knee, sighing and stretching his neck.  Krycek had still not smiled.

“Hey, what if instead of breaking in the back, we parachute in with the Flying Elvises?”  He held his beer aloft and then brought it down slowly at a slant in demonstration.  He looked at Krycek.  “You know?  Flying Elvises?”

Nothing at first.  And then…wait…wait…  Nope.  Just a roll of the eyes.

“Just tryin’ to keep things interesting for ya, Krycek,” he told the other man.  “You just not into the sequined suit?”  Krycek pinned him with a glare.  Oooh, so close, thought Mulder.  He got up to get a second beer.  “Want one?”

Krycek shook his head.

“Why, you drivin’?”  He sighed.  “Come on, Krycek.”  He really looked at the other man.  Then he came back over and stood behind the couch looking down at his partner.  He went with honesty.  “We could die, right?  Doing this?”

Krycek looked up sideways at him with blinking eyes.  Mulder really liked when he did that.  It was so…Alex.

Alex nodded.  “Yeah.”

“And there’s really nothing we can do until Thursday when we go to Memphis?  Nothing imminently invasion-oriented?”

Krycek sighed, frowning a little and dropping his gaze.

“Alex?”

The other man sipped in a breath and looked up at Mulder again.

“Let’s party like it’s 1999,”  Mulder suggested.

Krycek tried to hide it…to kill it with the scowl…but it couldn’t be stopped.  A small smile lifted the corners of Krycek’s mouth.  His voice came out low and sardonic.  “We have beer and Rambo, Mulder.”

Mulder smiled.  “Let’s party like it’s 1998, then,” he said.  Grinning with satisfaction, Mulder turned to go get more beer.

……….

Memphis was not just successful but fun.  They worked in Graceland, Krycek appearing to tolerate Mulder’s obsession with bemusement as they ventured through the rooms and Mulder told him everything he probably didn’t want to know about the King and then some.

Mulder regaled him with trivia as they went from room to room, and Krycek turned out to be quite an attentive listener, even though Mulder knew he had no investment in his idol.

They ate at B.B. King’s Blues Club, dining on fried pickles, shrimp po’ boys, pork ribs, and draft beer.  There was a band that night.  They played loud and raunchy and he and Krycek watched the couples dance as they finished their beers.

Mulder caught Krycek smiling a few times and it warmed him to see it.

They took the jet home that same night and fell through their front door exhausted on Elvis, water plants, and fried food.

“God, I smell like smoke,” Alex complained, stripping off his turtleneck on the way to the bathroom.  “Gonna shower,” he tossed over his shoulder.  His left…bare…shoulder, Mulder couldn’t help but notice.  Mulder got a glimpse of the tattoo as he sauntered away, the muscles in his back bunching as he moved, and too soon he was behind the closed door.

Mulder got ready for bed, his whole body aching for sleep.  It was past two in the morning and they’d been going since eight am the previous day.  He yawned and pulled off his shoes on the way to his bedroom, letting them flop onto the floor like dying fish.   He stripped down to his boxer-briefs and lay out on the bed just intending to rest his eyes while he awaited his turn with the bathroom.

He stirred a little as he heard the bathroom door open, but he couldn’t seem to rouse himself from his delicious stupor.  He’d had more fun with Krycek over the last eighteen hours than…  Well, he couldn’t remember another time that could give it a run for its money.  He just wanted to laze around with the memories.  Especially Krycek getting barbeque sauce all over his chin.  And dragging the guy through the jungle room.  And feeling like he had a partner.  Not just wanting to have one.  But believing he had one.  In Krycek.

“I just wanted to…”  Krycek began in his doorway.

Mulder slit his eyes open and tilted his head back to see the other man standing there.  Krycek’s mouth was open and he had the oddest look on his face.  Mulder stretched.  And then realized that not only was he naked except for the green boxer-briefs, but he had a nice, fat hard-on.

“Yeah?”  Mulder asked.  He felt too good to care.  So he had an erection.  He got ‘em a lot and for various reasons.  Krycek was a guy.  He’d understand.  But Mulder was blushing a little.  Because it wasn’t just any reason.  He was happy.  Happy about being partners with Krycek.  And he’d gotten aroused with even just the tiniest glimpse of the man’s tattoo.  He couldn’t help it.  He was quickly becoming obsessed with it.

“I, uh…”  Krycek stammered a little.

“What is it, Alex?” Mulder inquired sleepily.

“I just want to say that…”  He let out his breath.  “The bathroom’s yours.”

“Thanks,” Mulder replied.

“And I had fun.”

“What?” Mulder asked, starting to sit up.

But Krycek just answered, “Good-night,” and turned and went to his own room, shutting the door behind him.

Huh.

Well.

Mulder had finally gotten his good-night.  “Night, Alex,” he murmured to himself, getting up to go brush his teeth.

……….

“Our man in Raleigh.  He’s down.  You have to go in.”

The call came in at about three thirty.  Mulder woke to Krycek shaking him, the phone to his ear.  “Get up,” Krycek hissed.

“Alex?  Wha…?”

“Just get up,” Krycek said again, stalking out of his dark bedroom.

Three fucking thirty.  It had better be fucking important, Mulder had thought, scratching his head.  He’d only gotten an hour and a half of sleep.

But then Krycek had motioned to him to listen in on the call and Mulder had heard those words.  It was an emergency.  Their Raleigh operative had been apprehended, arrested, and worst of all, the vaccine had been impounded for testing.

By the FBI.

He and Krycek shared a loaded look.

“Scully,” Mulder said, running to retrieve his own cell phone and hitting speed dial two.

She answered on the fifth ring.  “’Lo?”

“Scully, it’s Mulder.  I need your help.”

There was a pause that frightened him.

“What is it, Mulder?”

Krycek had hung up with the Brit and was now listening intently.

“The Raleigh field office got hold of our vaccine.  If they figure out what it is, Scully…  It’s gonna get back to the Consortium and we’re dead in the water.”

She made a slightly exasperated sound.  Exasperated!  Mulder put his hand on his hip and paced.  Back and forth in front of Krycek.

“Whose vaccine is it, Mulder?”

“What?  You know whose!  Ours!  Scully, I need you to get it.  Just give them a call and request that it be sent to you over at Hoover.  Tell them it’s already part of an existing case you’re working or tell them…”

“I’m not telling them anything, Mulder.”

He stopped pacing.  “*What*?”

She sounded strained as she answered, “I think you heard me.”

“You…you’re not going to…help me?”

Silence.

“This isn’t about me, is it?  It’s about Krycek.”  He couldn’t look at the man standing just three feet away.  His jaw hurt from how hard he clenched it.  “Isn’t it?” he shouted.

Krycek held out a hand to get his attention.  He mouthed, “Come on,” holding that hand out to Mulder like he wanted Mulder to take it.

“Scully…”  Mulder started, disbelieving.

She whispered, “I can’t, Mulder.”

He hung up on her with a hissed curse, flinging the phone down on the couch and going to get dressed.

“Mulder…”

“No,” Mulder stopped him.  He dressed hurriedly and then got his bag with the blueprints.  “Where are we meeting him?”

“Air strip.  He’s going, too.”

“Car keys?” Mulder asked.

“Yeah, don’t forget your phone.”

Mulder nodded and picked it up on their way out.

“Let’s go, G-man,” Krycek rumbled, holding the door.

Mulder laughed once, the comment taking him by surprise.  It was a nervous laugh.

Krycek drove and they met with Townsend at a private air strip, filing up the stairs and into the small cabin of the jet.

“Mr. Mulder, I trust you’re well.”  The Brit raised his eyebrows at him as the engine geared up and they began to taxi.

He supposed he’d say something like that if they were lined up together to be shot execution style.  He just nodded, feeling a bit green and the worse for wear.

When they took off, the Brit spoke up again.  “The vaccine is in the third floor lab and we’re in luck because they haven’t identified it yet.  However, the clock is ticking.  Mr. Mulder.”

Mulder inhaled sharply.

“It’s not so long ago you wore one of these.  I’m sure you’ll fit right in.”  The old man held out a badge.  His badge.

“Where did you…?”

“I took the liberty of procuring it for you.  Let’s call it a souvenir.  Needless to say you’ll be walking in the front door.”

“But…”

“You’re a 32, 34…correct?” Townsend went on.  “You’ll find something suitable in that bag I expect.”

Mulder glanced behind himself where the Brit’s eyes had wandered.  On a hook hung a garment bag.  He took a deep breath and turned back around.  His ears were popping.

“You’re to get to the lab and engage the tech in an interview.  I have no doubt as to your ability in this area.”

“You want me to bullshit?”

“In a manner of speaking,” the old man agreed.  “Alex will take care of the vaccine…”

“Wait, how’s he going to get in?” Mulder asked.

“Our Alex has a backstage pass,” Townsend informed him.

Mulder looked to Krycek who looked serious and was staying very quiet through all of this.

“He will not be wearing a suit,” the old man added.

“So I walk in, you break in, and we meet up in the lab?”  Mulder inquired, still looking to his partner.

“Quite,” the old man answered.  “Alex, here are your documents.”  Their benefactor handed Krycek a folder that Krycek opened.  Mulder leaned over to see that it consisted mostly of blueprints for air ducts and stairways.  It also held a page of codes.  The Brit set about giving Krycek instructions on where the security cameras were and where to stand against which wall to remain concealed.

Mulder swallowed hard.  It was hitting him really for the first time who he’d thrown in with.  He was on the outside now, smuggling himself into institutions that would have invited him in happily before.  But it was more than that.

“Gentlemen,” the Brit began.  “You are to retrieve the vaccine.  There is no alternative course of action.  Take whatever measures are necessary to get the vaccine out of the building and back onto our side of the fence.  Any means is acceptable.  Do you understand?”

Mulder did.  Kill to get it if you have to.  He was outside the law now.   It was a whole new set of rules.  It wasn’t about the means, but the end.

Finally, Krycek spoke, his voice soft, meant to exclude the Brit.  “It’ll be okay,” he said.  Mulder swallowed and Krycek leaned forward.  “It’ll be okay.”

Mulder blinked and nodded at him, feeling a kinship he’d never before experienced with the other man.

Forty minutes later, they were descending into Raleigh.  Mulder fingered his badge, the lamination so familiar under the pads of his fingers.

………

Yelling.

“Go, go, go!”  Then, “Fuck!”

Mulder tried to open his eyes.

“It’s okay,” the voice above him said.  Krycek’s voice.  Softer now, gentle as he’d never heard it.  “Hang on, Mulder.”

Mulder felt the roar of an engine.  Were they still on the plane?  He seemed to remember getting off the plane.  Hadn’t they already even been in the FBI field office?  He could have sworn he’d walked in the door of the place.  Yeah, he had.  He’d been really excited…a little nervous.  He remembered looking at Krycek one last time, at those blinking eyes of his…

And then he realized it wasn’t a plane but a car that he was in.  But he couldn’t see out.  Could only part his lids enough to see Krycek’s face above him.  Above him?

“Mulder…”  To somebody else, “Shit, drive faster!”

“Kuh…”  Mulder began, his throat very dry.  It hurt somewhere deep in his side to try to talk.  Like maybe he’d pulled a muscle.  Had he?

“Shut up, Mulder,” Krycek hissed, but the expression on his face when he looked down at Mulder was one of worry and pain, not anger.  Mulder wanted to tell him he didn’t have to have that worried look on his face.  It was just a runner’s side stitch.

Then he thought he remembered something.  Did remember something.  The tech.  He’d been talking to the tech and Krycek had been behind the guy, in the little lab getting the vaccine.  Mulder had noticed the tech’s eyes dart to the glass behind Mulder…Alex’s reflection.

They went over a bump now.

“Unngghh!” Mulder moaned, the pain in his side announcing itself as something a little more than a stitch.  A little more like a gunshot wound.

“Shit…”  Krycek cursed under his breath.

Mulder raising his gun.  The Tech grabbing his wrist.  Mulder’s eyes darting to Alex behind the glass.  The gun turning in the other man’s meaty fists enclosing his own…the damned thing going off.

Mulder lifted his head and peered down his body to where Krycek’s hand disappeared into the blood-soaked folds of his own clothes.   The nicest suit he’d ever worn.  Son of a bitch.

He looked up again at his partner.  His head was in the other man’s lap, and Krycek’s prosthetic hovered over him, not quite ever touching, moving in the air above him like a frantic humming bird.

“Alex?”

“Shhh.”

“Alex?”

“Mulder, be quiet, dammit.”

“Did you…get it?” Mulder got out finally.

He watched Alex swallow then nod.  “Yeah.  We got it, Mulder.”

Mulder falling, clutching his side in agony.  Krycek advancing quickly…pulling his gun…aiming…the killshot…firing.

“Turn here!” Alex yelled to the front of the car.  They were in the back.   He and Alex…just the two of them like a date to the drive-in.  And Alex was already at second base.  Mulder tried to smile.

“What’s wrong?” Alex asked, leaning down into Mulder’s face.  He’s so beautiful close up like this, Mulder thought.

He swallowed.  “Nothing. Where…?”

“To the air strip.  I think we lost them.  I’m gonna get you to Townsend’s hospital.”

“No.”  Mulder shook his head weakly.  “Scully.”

“Mulder, you need medical attention now, you can’t wait for Scully.”

“Juss…”  he started.

“Just nothing.  There!  Pull over there!”

“Juss, don’ letum work on me til she gets there.”

“Dammit…”

“Call her, Alex.”

He watched Alex sigh hard through his nose.  Mulder blinked up at him.  “Fine.  I’ll call her.”  Then, “Somebody open the goddamned door!”

Mulder was able to stumble, with Alex half-carrying him, to the plane.  Alex, the Brit, and a medic of some kind got him settled on the floor with Alex’s hand never letting off pressure on his wound.

The medic elbowed in with a stethoscope and Mulder closed his eyes, focusing on Alex’s hand on him, always feeling it and always knowing the other man’s presence by it.

“Get his cell phone,” Alex said.

Someone fumbled in his pocket and pulled it out.

“You.  Hold this up to my ear.”

The hand.  Still there.  So strong.  Unmoving.  Unmovable.  Like a slab of warm granite.

The medic and the Brit talking.  Alex’s voice below.  “This is Alex Krycek.  He’s hurt.”

Mulder staggering in Krycek’s choke hold.  The other man’s voice rough in his ear…lips whispering over flesh.  ‘Go with it.’  And then the gun to his head and Krycek was shepherding him out of the building…his hostage. ‘Nobody fucking move!’

“We’ll be there in thirty minutes.”  A pause, then tightly, “Yes.  I know.”  He hung up and then his voice was louder again, right there, like the hand, even though Mulder didn’t know if he could open his eyes again.  He was pooped.  “How is he?”

The medic:  “He’s lost a lot of blood.  But you seemed to have slowed the bleeding quite a bit.  It’s hard to say.”

Mulder wanted to open his eyes.  He wanted to tell his partner that he was grateful.  He wanted to just look at him.  But he was exhausted.  He’d have to tell him later.  He resolved to tell him later.

Alex’s growl over him:  “Keep him alive.  If he dies, the whole world can go fuck itself for all I care.”

What did he say?  Mulder rolled his head to the side and realized it was in Alex’s lap again.  He felt the other man’s thigh against his cheek.  Say it again, Alex, Mulder wanted to reply.   I can’t believe it and so I want to hear it again.

“Sir.  You’re going to have to move your hand.  This needs taken care of.”

“Nnnn…”  Mulder groaned, tossing his head again.

There was a pause and a breath, then, “All right.  Just…don’t hurt him.”

“I’m just trying to save his life.  Like you said.”

So somebody else heard it, too.  Suddenly, Mulder wanted to smile.

“Ah…” he breathed.  Two syllables was one too many.

“Mulder?”  So fucking gentle, the big poser.

Mulder couldn’t make himself say anything more, so he lifted his hand a little, only letting it flop back down as he felt the plane lift and soar.

“Do you want…?” Alex began.

“Nnn,” Mulder grunted, flopping his hand again.

Finally, the doofus got it and slowly, carefully, slipped his blood-slippery hand into Mulder’s, grasping tightly.  And even as Mulder was jostled, the medic doing his best to patch Mulder up in the small space and around Alex, their hands never separated all the way there.

………

Mulder woke to brightness and the smell of disinfectant.

And Scully.

“Scully…” he breathed.  He watched her smile a little.  It was exhausted and tight around the corners.

“Where’s Alex?” he asked quickly.

Her jaw worked as she gritted her teeth.  “He’s not here,” was her answer.

Mulder frowned.  “Where am I?”

She sighed.  “Somewhere you won’t be for long if I have any say about it.”  At his frustrated look, she gave him a real answer.  “You’re in a Consortium hospital, Mulder.”  She pronounced Consortium like it hurt her mouth to say it.  “You’re being treated for a thoracic gunshot wound that perforated your spleen.”

He grimaced, not liking the sound of that, but really not having much idea what it really meant. What did the spleen do?  Just sit there, probably.

And where was Alex?

“I’m not gonna die before the Braves take the World Series again, am I?” he asked weakly.

“No,” Scully answered.  “But you had to have emergency surgery to remove your spleen.  You’ve been in recovery for about seven hours now.”

“So where’s Alex?”

She sighed.  “You have septicemia, Mulder.  A leaking of toxins into your entire thoracic area.  You have a high fever.”

He just stared at her for several moments until she told him somewhat shortly, “This is very serious.  You’re on heavy antibiotics and you’re going to be in the hospital a while.  And I’d like you to think about being transferred somewhere else when you can be moved.”

Mulder tried to smirk.  “Smells just like any ol’ hospital to me, Scully.”

“Mulder…”

“I can’t,” he told her, though it was becoming more of an effort to speak.  He was so damned sleepy.  But he wanted to see Alex before he passed right back out again.  “You know I can’t.  It’ll be okay,” he told her.  “You’ll see.”

She stared down at him for a few long moments in which his eyelids became very heavy and he could hardly stare back.

She sighed, nodding and dropping her gaze.  “All right.  But I’m staying here with you.  I don’t trust these people.”

He was able to just barely nod before he lost consciousness once more.

………..

The next time was not so bright.  A dull, buttery light suffused the room as Mulder cracked his heavy eyes open.  A dark figure stood over him, and its familiarity made him want to weep.   He supposed Scully was cranking him full of some weird-ass drug that made him susceptible to falling into an emotional state.  Or something.

Didn’t matter.  It was Alex.  Mulder smiled.  “Where ya been?”

He felt his hand released quickly and only then realized Alex had been holding it.  He missed its comforting warmth instantly.  He blinked and tried to clear his eyes.  Still, he couldn’t see Alex’s face, only his outline.

“Had to clean up my mess.”

“*Your* mess?” Mulder asked, frowning.

“You’re not the one who thinks he’s a vampire and doesn’t have a reflection,” Alex replied.

Mulder’s frown softened into a relieved smile.  “I’m just glad you’re…”  Then he stopped on what he’d been about to say.  Blame the drugs.  Tell him you’re tanked on the good stuff, he thought.  He covered with, “So are we on America’s Most Wanted yet?”

Alex lowered himself into a chair by Mulder’s bedside and scooted in closer.  Now Mulder could see his face.  Lined…tired…so pretty…so handsome.  Mulder blinked slowly.

“No,” Alex whispered hoarsely.  “That’s where I’ve been.  Townsend and myself.  We had to get the surveillance tapes.”

“And you did?” Mulder asked, turning his head a little on the pillow, lips parted as he waited for the answer.

“Yes.  We don’t think they got a lock on you.  And if they got me…”  Alex shrugged.  “They’re looking for me anyway, right?”

Mulder smiled tiredly at him.  Then he took a breath, the relief at having Alex here with him unharmed threatening to overwhelm him.  “You did good,” he said.  Alex chuffed a laugh looking down.  Mulder reached out and touched his partner’s sleeve with the backs of his fingers.  “You saved my life, Alex.”

Alex looked back up, into Mulder’s eyes, his own moist and gold-lit aqua.  Mulder stroked across the material once more with a quiet, “Thank you,”  before reluctantly dropping his hand back down to the bed.  God, how he wanted to just show him!  It hurt now.  Whatever it was between them.  It hurt not to have more.  He couldn’t even thank him like he wanted to.  Mulder closed his eyes on a pained sigh.

“You need rest,” Alex said lowly.

Mulder took a long inhale.  He didn’t lift his eyes.  It would be easier to say if he didn’t.  “I don’t want you to leave.”

There was silence between them, then.  Mulder didn’t know what to do to make him stay.  He couldn’t say anything more and decided he’d probably already said too much.

But then Alex’s voice stroked over him.  “You rest.  I’ll stay.”

Mulder closed his eyes on a smile.  Before he dropped off, he murmured, “Good boy.”

……….

He slept a lot the next few days, only surfacing to see either Alex or Scully and have brief conversations with them, mostly about his own recovery or the big Raleigh sweep-up.

Or not.

One time he woke in the middle of the night to Alex’s warm darkness by his side.  Once again the other man had hold of his hand.  And this time, he didn’t let Alex let go when he tried to pull away.

It was dark…safe…the feeling almost an anonymous one since he couldn’t make out Alex’s face nor could the other man really see him  He’d grasped Alex’s hand as it struggled weakly to pull free.  It was a very brief, sweet, little battle of wills before Alex gave in.  His surrender making Mulder take a shaky, controlled breath as he held Alex’s hand firmly in his.

They’d not said word one to each other.  And Mulder fell back asleep within a few minutes of waking.

It had been better than sex.

Scully affirmed for Mulder that he was doing quite well and would get to go home in just a couple more days.  He whined, kavetching at her stoic refusal to release him sooner.  He argued that he was up and peeing and was even able to shower by himself for a full two minutes before trembling back into the bed.  He left out the part about the trembling, of course.  Still, she was unmovable.

Mulder had started to wonder at the fact that he never saw the two of them together.  Superman syndrome, he thought, smirking at the thought of Scully transforming into Krycek inside a phone booth, complete with K-emblazoned leather jacket.

But the day before Scully had set his release, he was unfortunate enough to witness their meeting.

“Scully…”  Alex had intoned softly on his way out of Mulder’s room.

She had said nothing, her whole body screaming, ‘Say one more thing and I’ll have you arrested so fast your body will smoke.’  He passed her with a backward glance at Mulder, and she stalked over to his bed.

“He saved my life, Scully, can’t you just say hello?” Mulder asked.

She shot him a look of pure death.  “*Saved* you?  Mulder?  You think Alex Krycek saved you?”

He pressed the button on his bed remote, hating how…geriatric it made him feel as he got to a sitting position.  “I know he did, Scully.  Why can’t you accept that?”

Under her breath and looking ceilingward:  “Why can’t I accept it.”

“Yes, Scully.”  His voice was rising.  “Why?”

“Maybe because he’s a no-good, lying coward who’d save his own skin before he’d blink at taking yours,” she answered heatedly.

“You don’t know him!” Mulder shouted.  “He’s different than that!  He’s a good partner!”

She gasped and looked away.  And that was it, wasn’t it?

“How can you…?” she whispered.

“How can I say that?  Because it’s the truth, Scully.  Just because you don’t like it, doesn’t make it untrue.  I trust him.  I trust him with my life!”

“You trust that psychotic piece of scum?  What’s happened to you, Mulder?”

“What’s happened to you, Scully, that you refuse to see the truth?  I won’t fucking lie here while you call him names when you don’t know the first thing about him!”

“Look where you are, Mulder.  You were involved in the death of an FBI agent!  These people are killers.”

Mulder narrowed his eyes.  “We wouldn’t have had to go in there at all if you’d helped us,” he said quietly.  “We’re not the only ones responsible for the death of that agent.”

Scully’s mouth dropped open.  “Mulder…”  she trailed off.  “You asked me to lie for him!”

“For us, Scully.  And you’re right.  I did ask you to lie.  And because you wouldn’t, Alex ended up having to kill.  To save me.”

Scully stared down at him, tears shimmering in her eyes.

“Do you know why I’m doing this?” Mulder asked helplessly.  “These people…they’re more concerned with making a difference than with playing by the rules.  They’re my people, Scully.”

“These are Krycek’s people!” she shouted down at him.

He took a breath, no longer wanting to yell, only wanting her to understand.

“Krycek’s my people…Scully,” he answered softly.

“Dammit,  Mulder…!”

“Do you think it’s good to get him so upset?” came a low voice from the doorway, soft but ready to become something dangerous.

Mulder looked around Scully’s fuming form as she turned to look, too.  She took a breath to rail at him, Mulder could tell, but then her eyes came back to Mulder and she sighed, blinking madly.

“I’ve gotta go.  I’ll be back later.”

Then she turned and left, stalking past Krycek and sticking to the wall to avoid any contact like he was some vile specimen she’d abhor having to touch.

Krycek looked at the floor, biting his lip.

“Didn’t know you were going to have to ref, did you?” Mulder asked wryly.  Alex looked up with a sad smile and Mulder asked,  “How long were you there?”

Alex walked slowly over to Mulder’s bedside, looking down again until he got there, then he peered at Mulder from under his long lashes.  “I, uh…I kind of never left,” he answered sheepishly.

Mulder smiled.  “Probably a good thing.”  Then he swallowed, smile fading.  “So you heard…everything?”

Alex nodded.  Then he pinned Mulder with a hopeful, inquisitive gaze, a frown creasing above his pert nose.

“It’s all true, you know,” Mulder told him in a rough, soft voice.  “Everything I said…about you.”

“You don’t think I’m a psychotic piece of scum?” Alex nearly whispered.  Mulder was sure it was meant to come out light.  Any humor fell flat as Alex’s sincerity shone through, hurting Mulder’s heart.

Mulder shook his head slowly.  “No, Alex.  No, I don’t.”

Alex laughed once, unable to lift his gaze from the edge of Mulder’s bed.  Mulder watched his lashes flutter…his throat work to swallow over and over.  It gave Mulder the courage to reach out to him.  His hand rose from his own side and bravely sought out Alex’s, turning the sweating palm against his own and clasping it surely.

His voice was nearly choked as he spoke.  “You’re a good partner.  And I trust you.  I trust you, Alex.”  He worked his own tears back down his throat.  Alex’s breath was coming in small, scared pants.  Mulder went on.  “I never thought I’d be able to say that.”

Alex lifted his glistening eyes to Mulder’s face just for a trembling moment and nodded.  Ten breaths later, he gently extracted his hand from Mulder’s.

“I should let you rest some more,” he said.

Mulder whined around a groan in frustration.  “Jesus, I’m sick of fucking rest!” he exclaimed.  “C’mon, break me outta here.  Please?”  He was giddy on what was happening.

Alex huffed and rolled his eyes.  Mulder watched him bite back a smile.  “Tomorrow,” he rumbled.  “You can make it.”  He glanced up at Mulder warmly.  Then he smirked.  “Not to be a total buzzkill or anything.”

Mulder smiled.  “You’re just taking care of me.”

Alex inhaled sharply, but then smiled again tremulously.  “Want pizza for dinner tomorrow night?”

“Burrito casserole,” Mulder enthused.

Alex started to back away, still smiling.  “Burrito casserole, then.”

“Thanks, Alex.”

His partner nodded.  Then he turned and walked out of the room, leaving Mulder nearly breathless.

……….

Alex came back that night as he had since Mulder had been hospitalized.  He brought water and sat with Mulder, watching inane TV for a while.

Mulder was much more drained then than he had been earlier, the confrontation with Scully and subsequent revelations with Alex having taken a lot out of him.

Mulder sat up, feeling like if he didn’t go take a piss before he conked out, he’d wet the bed rather than get his lazy ass up in the middle of the night.  He started to swing his legs over the side.

“You need help?” Alex asked, standing and stepping back for him, moving the chair he’d been sitting in.

“Nah.  I got it,” Mulder assured him.

But once he was up and on his feet, a wave of dizziness swept over him and nearly took him down.  Alex stepped in quickly and grabbed for him.  He wrapped Mulder up in a strong arm and held him up against his body.

Mulder’s eyes swam for a moment, but then the room seemed to solidify.  And then he was just standing, in his stupid hospital gown, pressed tightly up against Alex’s chest and hip.

His lips parted and he looked at Alex’s slightly open mouth.  He felt his hands coming up…hovering…and then he settled them, holding Alex’s waist and catching his breath.  Trying to.  It kept running away.

“Th-thanks,” he whispered.  His gaze rose to Alex’s to find the other man looking at his mouth as well.  The other man just nodded.  “Thanks, Alex,” Mulder murmured.  And it was another few long moments before Alex’s hold loosened a little.

“You…” he started.  “Can you stand okay?”

Mulder nodded.  Even though he wanted to say no.  Just to stay there with him.  “Yeah.  I’ll be all right,” he said quietly.

Alex nodded again, and then finally stepped away, slowly letting Mulder loose.

Mulder released Alex, too.  One hand at a time, his palms missing the feel of how perfectly the other man’s hips had molded into them. He dropped his gaze as he made his way to the bathroom and shut the door.  When he came out, Alex was still there, hovering in that exact same spot, looking a bit dazed.

“It’s okay,” Mulder said, walking back over to the bed and lying back down.  “I’m fine, Alex.”  He smiled at his partner, who nodded once more and then wordlessly turned around and left.

………..

Home had never felt more like…home.  The minute he walked in the door.  It had that unique smell.  Basil and coffee and warm, running computers.  He’d know it with his eyes shut.

Alex ushered him over to the couch and made him lie down.  Even though he felt like sitting in one of the computer chairs, rolling over to the kitchen, and idly rotating as he watched Alex cook.  Just like he did most nights.  He frowned as Alex came back from his room and covered him with his Aztec throw.  It was kind of scratchy and Mulder was hot already without it, but he kept it anyway and the frown didn’t last.  It was like a cat bringing you a rat or a dog offering his chew toy.  It didn’t matter that you didn’t really need it or even want it;  it was valued by the giver and you were valued by the giving of it.

Alex brought him water, juice, vitamins, and the TV remote.  He smiled shyly at Mulder as he took himself back to the kitchen to get dinner started.  Mulder put the TV on mute, preferring the sound of pots and pans and water running.

Soon, the smell of burrito casserole wafted in and Mulder moaned.

“You okay?” came from the kitchen.

“Yeah, great, it just smells so fucking good.”

“That’s because it is fucking good,” Alex replied.  Was that a…sultry tone?  It thrilled through Mulder’s body and he closed his eyes on it.

They ate on the couch, Mulder’s legs dutifully concealed under Alex’s blanket.  They watched the last half hour of ‘Long Kiss Good-Night.’  Mulder sat up a little straighter. “Look,” he said.  “Girl Alex.”

He got a strange sideways look from the other man, but it seemed more curious than affronted.

Without asking, Alex refilled Mulder’s water once they were done eating.  “You need to take your antibiotics,” he said.

“Can’t I take ‘em later?  I hate those things.”

Alex looked at the bottle’s label. “It says take with a meal.  You need to take it now.”

Mulder grumped, but he held out his hand.  “They’re big as my head,” he muttered.

This got him an eyebrow raise, though Alex said nothing.

Alex sat with him, got him things, and kept him company until Mulder’s eyes started to close against his will.

“You ready for bed?” Alex asked.  Mulder wondered if Alex knew how positively sexy he sounded.

“No,” he answered, yawning.

“C’mon.”  Alex stood.

“You’re…putting me to bed?” Mulder replied, astounded.

“Are you going to go if I don’t?” Alex countered.

Mulder felt his heart pound like a caged beast in his chest.  “No,” he replied, dangerously.

Alex’s eyes dilated, his own chest rising and falling a little more rapidly.  He held out his hand.

Mulder waited a moment, dropping his gaze to the outstretched hand, then he brought his gaze back to Alex’s, reached out, and let his hand be enclosed in his partner’s.  He stood, Alex pulling very gently.  Alex began to lead Mulder back to his room, walking slowly.  Mulder held his hand and clutched at his arm lightly, leaning a little.

Alex guided Mulder inside, helping him over to the bed.  It hurt to let go.  Felt so good to touch him.  Mulder took a deep, shuddering breath, sitting on the bed and then pushing himself back onto it, holding Alex’s gaze.  He got halfway under the covers and inhaled deeply, smiling a little crookedly at the other man.

Alex was not smiling.  He stared down at Mulder in the bed, and his look was pure heat.  God…

Mulder held the gaze a moment too long, his smile fading and his breath audible.

Alex closed his eyes once.  “Good-night, Mulder,” he nearly growled.  Then he stepped away from the bed and walked to the doorway.

Mulder sighed, his body thrumming, wishing to hell he hadn’t just gotten out of the damned hospital.  “Night, Alex,” he lamented.   The other man didn’t look back, just turning off the light and leaving.

………..

Three days later they got the call from the Brit.  He was coming.  And bringing part of his army with him.

They’d been found out.

Alex hung up and shot his wide-eyed gaze to Mulder.

An hour later their little private headquarters, their home, was swarming with people.  Men and women, mostly Russian, some American.  Theirs was to be the D.C. resistance lighthouse.  Home-base.

The Brit took Mulder and Alex aside.  It was happening now, they were told.  “Raleigh was the tip off,” Townsend intoned.

“Fuck!”  This from Alex.

Mulder reached out and touched his arm, holding it for a moment, squeezing, an unspoken assurance that he hadn’t caused this.  They all knew it had been a matter of time.  He removed his hand quickly once he felt Alex’s tense muscles relax marginally under his fingers.

Townsend looked down at where Mulder’s hand had been then looked back up, continuing.  “Time is of the essence,” he said.  “The strikes will begin in one week.  We’ll organize in all the major cities.  Troops have been dispersed already.”

Mulder stepped forward.  “Wait, remember what we’re fighting.  Massive swarms of bees.”  He looked between Alex and the Brit.  “There’s no guarantee the aliens are going to advance on an uninfected populace.  They’d be wiser to wait.”

Alex’s voice was low and considering.  “But, Mulder, we have to be ready for just such an eventuality.”

“I’m not saying don’t be ready to fight.  I’m saying we’re missing the bigger picture.  The best weapon we have is to get this information out…to the public.”  His eyes implored Alex, the Brit largely ignored.

“You mean…hijack the satellites?” Alex asked.

“No.”  Mulder shook his head, a triumphant smile dawning across his face.  “The EAS.  Emergency Alert System.  We hack it.”

Alex’s eyes narrowed, but Mulder could tell it meant he was reaching him.   It was his Considering It face.

“FEMA,” Townsend added in.  Mulder and Krycek both looked to him.  “The Federal Emergency Management Agency.  The EAS is coordinated through them.  The Consortium has people there, high up.”

“Do you have access?”  Mulder asked, excited.

The Brit looked less than pleased.

“Look, this is the way, I’m telling you.  I know this.  If I have a purpose in all of this mess, this is it.”

Alex interjected, “He’s right.”  Mulder’s eyes shot to the other man’s face, but his partner was looking at the old man.  “Mulder and the Gunmen can coordinate the signal.  If we can get the public’s attention…get those that haven’t been inoculated yet into hiding…we could reduce the risk of infection astronomically.”

“But we’d be declaring war.  Before we’re ready,” the Brit objected.

Alex practically snarled his answer.  “Who says we’re not ready.”

It was decided.  They’d go on the offensive with a message to the public.  What that message would be was a source of disagreement, however.

The Brit had gone, called to a meeting with the others of his stature within the resistance.  Krycek addressed their new army in the now-full barracks.

“We knew this day would come,” he said to them.   Mulder watched how they listened intently, all voices going silent.  They feared him, that was obvious.  That gruff voice and those narrowed eyes probably didn’t help.  Mulder made a mental note to talk to him about his demeanor around the troops.  “They don’t know which cities are inoculated or how the vaccine was administered.  They’ll want to get their hands on any one of you to get at this information before the release of the virus.  Be alert.  Nobody goes out alone. Always be on your guard.”

Mulder watched the wide eyes take in Alex’s prosthesis.  It labeled him in their eyes.  One of the ones who escaped the test.  But who paid a permanent price.

Group leaders were chosen and once everyone had dispersed, Mulder sat at the computer and prepared to email the Gunmen.

Alex paced behind him.

“Quit it, you’re freaking me out,” Mulder said, clicking on their addy.

“Mulder, we need to talk about the message,”  Alex stated, still pacing, ignoring his partner’s request.

“What do you mean?  Bees, genetically engineered, are going to be released carrying an extraterrestrial virus meant to infect the populace world-wide and…”

“Whoa.  Mulder.”  Alex stopped. “You can’t tell them all that.”

Mulder swiveled in his chair, turning to face Alex, legs splayed.  “Why not?  I thought that was the plan.”

“They need to be warned, Mulder, but they’re just not ready to hear the whole truth.  They’re going to be panicked as it is.  The ones that believe it will be hysterical.  And we have to face the fact that this much information is going to overwhelm some people.  Many won’t believe it, Mulder.”

Mulder huffed and rolled his eyes.  “Well, what the hell are we supposed to tell them then?  I don’t wanna lie, Alex!”

Alex took a step toward Mulder and Mulder tilted his face up to keep looking into his eyes.  “We won’t lie,” Alex told him.  “Killer bees.  That’s the truth isn’t it?  Swarms of killer bees.  We’ll advise people to take cover…get to cellars or basements…wherever they can.”

Mulder nodded.  “And stock up on Die, Bug, Die.”  He chewed his lip.  He looked up at Alex and the other man’s lips curved up in a smile.  It absolutely melted Mulder’s insides.

“Your idea is genius,” Alex told him.

Mulder exhaled sharply.  “Really?”

“You know it is.”

Mulder sighed, then, “I hope it works.”

Alex smirked.  “Don’t you worry your pretty little head.”  Then he winked -- winked! --and turned and walked away.

Mulder sat stunned for a long moment before he turned back to his computer.  He typed with a small smile on his face.

    Hey guys.  Can your kung fu do this?

………

They were there in half an hour after receiving Mulder’s email.

“FEMA?  Way cool,” said Langly.  “You know they killed Kennedy.”

Byers continued, “And you have a man with the encryption codes?”

“Yeah, we’ll have it by tomorrow morning,” Mulder answered.

“You insult my immense power,” Langly chided.  “I can be in by tomorrow without any damned code crutch, dudes.  Their firewalls don’t scare me.”

Frohike rolled his eyes and Krycek leaned in to murmur in Mulder’s ear, “Have fun. I’m going on conference call.”

Mulder nodded, thrilling to his nearness before he moved away, taking his cell into his bedroom with him and closing the door.

“Who’s the party pooper?” Langly asked, already stalking the FEMA website for fun.

“Are you living in a cave, that’s Alex Krycek, you dork!” Frohike hissed.

Mulder patted Langly on the shoulder and then smiled to himself as the boys went into a whisper frenzy about his reclusive partner.

“You didn’t know that was him?” Byers croaked.

“Shut up, I was distracted.”

“You’re such a dorkface.”

“Who’s a dorkface, dorkface?”

Mulder’s cell rang. “Don’t get to hacking just yet, Langly, the signal needs formatted first,” he said, wandering away a little before he answered it.  “Mulder.”

He listened to the frantic voice on the other end of the line.  “He ees dead!  He ees dead!”

“Calm down.  Who is this?  Who’s dead?”

“This is…Vladi!  Ehm, Vladimir Haliche!  He ees dead.”

“Okay, Vladi.  Breathe, all right?”  Already it was forming in his head.  Horribly, fatally forming.  Haliche must have been that kid the old man took with him.  The fresh Russian boy with the tough-set jaw and the face of a cherub Mulder remembered.  The one with the dark, almost black hair…

The guy fell into Russian, then.  It came fast from his lips and Mulder cursed that he’d only learned a few select phrases from Alex.  But one of them, the kid used.  Over and over.  Bozhe moi.  My God.

“Vladi,” Mulder said calmly, though his body had begun to release a thin, sick sheen of cold sweat.  “Tell me what happened.”

“He went into meeting.  He told me to wait outside.  He told me to wait!  I didn’t know they weren’t supposed to be there!  I did not know!”

“Breathe, Vladi,” Mulder said authoritatively.  “I want to help you, but I need to know exactly what’s happened.”

The Gunmen were staring at him now, three mute mouths and six wide, waiting eyes.

“I wait outside meeting.  Like he told me…like he told me…” the kid shivered out.

“Go on,” Mulder encouraged.

“I was smoking cigarette when they came up to door.  Five men.  In suits.  Just like rest of them.  They walked right past me.”  He swallowed and continued.  “I was out of cigarettes.  I knew Phillip’s driver smoke…and that he keep his cigarettes in ze ehm…ze eh…compartment!  I was going to steal one.  Bum one, you say.  I walk away and…and…it blow up!  Ze whole building!  He ees dead!  Zey are all dead!”

Mulder’s mouth opened on an erratic breath.  He felt ill.  “Okay, where are you?” he asked, though it was only instinct.  His brain was trying to deny the truth of it.  “You’re not still there, are you?”

“N-no, sir.  I…I am…”  He must have been looking around himself.  “I am at station for petrol.  It is…abandoned.  I am alone.”

“Do you see any street signs?”

“Ehm…Parker and…Saint James,” he practically sobbed.  This guy was no soldier.  Mulder was beginning to guess why the older man had kept this kid so close at hand.  Mulder closed his eyes.  Dead.  Townsend dead.  And the others at their meeting…all higher-ups in the resistance echelon…taken out.

“Okay, I’m sending somebody for you.  It’ll be a blue Taurus, all right, Vladi?  I’m sending a man named Byers.  He’s got a beard and he’s wearing a yellow T-shirt.”  Byers looked down at himself with a frown, but Mulder snapped his fingers and pointed back to his room nodding.  Byers got the hint and hurried off to change.  “Stay low.  Don’t move until you see the car, and then wait for Byers to get out.  Okay, Vladi?”

“Okay, sir…okay…” the kid whispered.

“Sit tight,” Mulder finished, then added, “It’ll be okay,” before hanging up.

“Frohike, I need you to go with Byers.  They may be onto us here, so I need you to watch and see if you’re tailed.”

Frohike nodded.  “Fear not, rogue agent,” he drawled, already moving away to get the car.

 “Wait, stay here, I have to get Alex,” Mulder told him.

He turned and started off toward the bedroom door when it flew open.  Their eyes met.  Something was wrong.  Even more wrong.  Alex opened his mouth.

“We’ve lost contact with Los Angeles.”

………

Alex was packing a small bag angrily.  Mulder stood in the bedroom and watched him.

“Fucking Christ,” Alex muttered.

“Do you have to go out?” Mulder asked.  It seemed to all be going to hell.  He didn’t like the idea of them splitting up.

“There’s no one else,” Alex answered, punching a shirt down into the black duffel.  What he didn’t say was that Townsend’s death essentially put Alex in charge.  Mulder knew there were only a very few larger players left.  And Alex was the Brit’s protégé.  And Mulder, Alex’s second in command.  He knew that was how it worked.  Mulder would be expected to keep the East coast together in Alex’s absence.  And Alex was right.  He had to go to L.A.  He had to assess the damage, assuming there’d been a similar mass assassination in the West, and he had to regroup the resistance.

“You’re going to try to bring the Rebels in…aren’t you,” Mulder said softly.  It was something they’d been discussing.  The Brit had advised against it, even though Mulder and Krycek knew he’d once believed that was the only way.  He’d since declared the alien rebels too unpredictable…in service to themselves much as the Consortium was.  He said that they could be a valuable ally…if they didn’t decide to turn on them, too.  But Alex had always wanted to.  And Mulder had been inclined to agree.  They needed as much help as they could get.

“It’s time,” Alex said.  “The old man was right.  Once we send that signal, it’s open season on us…it’s war.”  He stopped and looked Mulder square in the eye.  “Hell, it already is, Fox, we’ve just been turning a blind eye to it.”

Mulder swallowed, blinking at his partner.  He licked his lips, nodding.  That was certainly a first.  Mulder wanted to think about what it meant, but there was no room for anything else right now other than finding out how drastic the damage was and fixing it so they could band together and fight.  Alex was right.  There’d be no more trips to Graceland.  And burrito casserole night would just have to wait.

Mulder reached behind himself and picked up Alex’s Glock from the nightstand he’d finally bought himself.  He handed it to Alex.  “Tell me you’ll be careful.”  Mulder felt his chest tighten.  This is what Alex did…what he’d always done.  As Mulder was in on this to coordinate the releasing of the truth to the public, Alex was in this to fight.  It was his dharma, his purpose, Mulder realized with a small, sad laugh.  Mulder suddenly wished his partner was a computer nerd.  Or someone less important.  It was just his bad luck to have feelings for a renegade triple agent whose job it was to fight aliens in the war of the worlds.

Mulder nearly gasped.  But he swallowed it down, looking at the other man with new eyes, wide with fear of what he now knew was happening.  God.  Bad fucking timing Mulder, he thought.

Alex took his gun from Mulder’s hand, frowning and fluttering his lashes before stowing it away under his jacket.  “Thanks.”  His voice was all smoke and ash.

Mulder just nodded, looking down.  He hadn’t said he’d be careful.  He was a risk-taker.  Asking him to be careful would be like asking him to breathe through his ears from now on.

Alex cleared his throat, turning to zip up his bag.  “You’ll need to call New York.  Let Danny know what’s going on.  He knows about L.A. but not Townsend.  He’ll probably want to come down to help on this end.”  Alex looked up to Mulder briefly.  “That gonna work for you?”

Mulder swallowed.  “Yeah.  Of course.”  He felt like a spoiled brat now for putting his mind on such an inconsequential thing as jealousy before.  He flushed, remembering how he’d acted.

Alex slung the bag over his shoulder.  “You can kick his ass once if you need to get it out of your system,” he rumbled, glancing up at Mulder with a tiny, warm smile.

Mulder turned beet-red, he was sure of it.  But it was Alex who dropped his gaze.  “Mulder…” he began, eyes downcast.  Mulder watched him lick his lips repeatedly.  “I don’t want you leaving here,” he said, and it was nearly a growl.  “If you need something, send someone else.  All right?”  He flitted his eyes up then and the sharp gaze was intent, almost threatening.  Mulder remembered what he’d said when he thought Mulder was passed out from his gunshot wound.

Keep him alive.  If he dies, the whole world can go fuck itself for all I care.

Mulder took an unsteady breath and nodded, and Alex sighed a relieved breath.  “Good,” he said.  Then again, “Good.”  He looked uncomfortable, then, the frown etched deeply over his little nose.

He turned and walked out of the bedroom, and Mulder followed.

Vladi had been brought back and Byers kind of took the frightened kid under his wing, sitting him down and making him some soup.  Mulder was grateful for his friends’ presence.  With Alex getting ready to leave, he couldn’t spare much attention for anything else.

They said their good-byes amidst the small group of people in their living area and it was short and business-like, but with the underlying knowing of what had been said while they’d been alone together.  Alex nodded to him with a prolonged look at the door and Mulder gave him a tight smile in return.  Then his partner turned and left.

Mulder heard Vladi whimper, “I miss Phillip.”

……….

Danny arrived that evening with enough hypodermic needles to supply the Red Cross for a year.  When Mulder had called him and filled him in on their situation the man had fulfilled Alex’s prophecy and insisted on flying down to help Mulder and their troops.

“Guns and needles.  Doubly prepared, right?” he’d suggested.

Mulder held his breath when the sound went off signifying an approaching vehicle down the long drive. The second sound went off again as Danny used the code to drive through the gate.

Mulder had mobilized the group a little earlier, making sure they knew to be ready for a briefing before supper.  They’d looked wary and fidgety.  He’d felt compelled to talk to them some more.  He told them how important what they were doing was.  He told them he had the utmost confidence in them and that things were still moving forward as planned and that he and Mr. Krycek were extraordinarily lucky to have such a fine fighting force working with them to make the world safe…to keep it as their own.

He didn’t feel like he’d done a particularly fantastic job of boosting morale, but when he was finished there were smiles of renewed confidence blooming on their faces as they looked at one another...nodded…and a few shouts of agreement echoed through the space.  He’d nodded to them and left to go wait for Danny back at the main building.

Now Danny was here.  Walking through Mulder and Alex’s front door.  Mulder had sat in a computer chair to work with Langly on what was now simply called The Message, but he stood as Danny walked in and sought Mulder out with an anticipatory glance around.

“Mulder,” Danny greeted him with a smile, extending his hand warmly.

Mulder took it and shook, unable to make his smile anything but terse in return.  Alex had gone to bed with this guy.  The man had seen Alex naked.  Touched Alex.

“I brought two people from my team,” Danny said now.  “They’re bringing in the vaccine.  I’d better help them.”

Mulder nodded.  “I’ll come, too.”

Mulder grudgingly gave Danny points for not just letting his ‘team’ do all the grunt work.  He was a hands-on kind of guy.  It was good for the resistance to have leaders who didn’t just delegate.  Then Mulder’s mind wandered to how else Danny might want to be hands-on, and he finished carrying in the boxes and containers with a frown on his face.

“Thanks,” Danny said to the woman and man he’d brought as they set down their heavy loads against one wall.  “Oh, Sandy and Derrick, this is Mr. Mulder.”

Mulder shook both their hands.  “Just Mulder…actually.”

“That’s right,” Danny said.  “Alex said you were a last names kind of guy.”

Mulder frowned a little, but he nodded.

“So, how do you want to do this?” Danny asked amiably.  “I’m just here to help.  What can I do?”

Mulder sighed.  He wasn’t very despisable.  “Do you wanna…?”  He gestured toward the couch.

Danny nodded.  “Thanks.”

They settled a respectable distance away.  “Oh, do you want something to drink?” Mulder asked belatedly.

“No, I’m cool,” Danny said.  “And if I do get thirsty, you can just point me in the direction of the kitchen.  I don’t expect you to wait on me or anything.”  His smile was genuine.  He was, as Mulder had noticed before, very attractive.  He was thin but strong-looking with a body not unlike Mulder’s own.  His hair was blond, though, and longer than Mulder’s…kind of silky-looking…shiny.  It reminded him of Alex’s hairstyle a few years ago.  The first time Mulder had seen him after he’d split the Bureau.  That dark, horrible night…

Danny flicked the hair out of his eyes and smiled.  His teeth were white and even.  Mulder searched a little desperately for a flaw.  He seemed to have chapped lips.  That was all Mulder could come up with.

Mulder cleared his throat.  Danny was looking at him, waiting for him to say something.  God forbid this guy get the wrong idea and think Mulder was scoping him out.

“Uh…Well, I thought you might be hungry, so I’m…” He looked over at the kitchen.  “I’m kind of fixing dinner.”

“You cook?” Danny asked, sounding surprised.  Mulder found himself wondering what exactly Alex had told him…and why the subject of whether or not Mulder cooked had come up at all.

“Uh, no.  It’s a frozen pizza.  Alex mostly…  Well, he’s the one who…”

“Feeds you?” Danny finished with a crooked half-smile.

Mulder swallowed.  “Uh…yeah.”

Mulder cut the pizza in half and put each semi-circle on a plate, handing one to Danny.  Langly was hard at work on the computer across the room and Frohike and Byers had gone to help fix food next door, taking Vladi with them, so Mulder and Danny retired back to the sofa to eat alone.  True to his statement, Danny got his own glass of water and didn’t complain that the pizza wasn’t in traditional slice format.

They talked about how the debriefing would go after dinner.  They agreed that Danny would explain everything he could about the vaccine, he being Vaccine Guy.  The troops had been given a quick course on its basics, the Brit had told Mulder and Alex, but they needed more.  All they really knew was how it felt to be infected by the black oil and that this was the substance they were shot up with prior to each torture session.

Mulder talked to Danny about what these men and women had gone through and how it was most likely a sensitive subject for them all.  Danny listened and nodded compassionately, assuring Mulder that he’d use care in his language and delivery.

“Did you know Alex was infected once?” Mulder found himself asking.  They’d not yet spoken of Alex except that weird food thing, and Mulder held his breath as he waited for the answer.

Danny swallowed, putting down his empty plate, and nodded.  “He told me.  Although he didn’t say much about what it was like.”

It was Mulder’s turn to nod.  He looked at his watch.  Six thirty.  Alex would be calling any time now.

“Is it time for the meeting?” Danny asked.

“No.  I told them seven,” Mulder answered.

“Oh,” said Danny.  Then he ducked his chin.  “Alex gonna call?”

Mulder frowned.  “Yeah.”

Danny leaned back into the couch cushions.  “You worried?”

Mulder thought about it for a minute.  Then he made an unconcerned face.  “No.  The plane’s probably just running late.”

Danny nodded.  “How long’s he there?”

“Just a day or two,” Mulder answered.

Danny nodded again and his face softened into an understanding smile.  Understanding of what?  Mulder shifted uncomfortably.  “Do you want something else?  I’ve got canned peaches or…”

“He cares about you an awful lot, you know.”

Mulder froze in the act of getting up for more food.  “Huh?” He slowly lowered himself back down.

“Don’t you wanna know what he says about you?” Danny asked, flashing him a small smile.

Mulder narrowed his eyes, swallowing.

Danny shifted positions on the couch.  “I guess I just thought you’d wanna grill me.”  He made a little sound at Mulder’s continued silence.  “It’s just that…I know I would…in your place.”  He dropped his voice.  “Alex can be a little, uh…reticent…about his feelings.”

Mulder laughed shortly.  God, what a relief to be able to discuss this!  He hadn’t realized he’d wanted to.  And before him was a virtual goldmine of Alex information.  He scooted forward a little.  “What...makes you think…?”

“That he’s crazy about you?”

Mulder’s breath caught.

“Well, it’s not just any one thing he says.  It’s more…just how he talks about you.  I get the feeling if I said one slightly disparaging thing about you that he’d take my head off.  Not that I’d want to,” he corrected.  “You seem great.  Really good for him.”

Mulder’s eyes widened.  How could he know that?  He’d been a fucking turd when Danny had met him!  Any good information had to be coming from Alex!  It certainly wasn’t shining through his fabulous personality.

“How long…have you known him?” Mulder asked, his stomach churning, not wanting to know what he might be told but having to ask anyway.

“Townsend sent him to me once they had the Russian vaccine.  The old fart didn’t trust his own group with it anymore since they turned over that rebel guy, so he sent Alex to me with it right after Alex sent you to that airforce base to break the rebel out.”  Danny got a thoughtful look on his face.  “He just seemed…like a guy who’d been through a lot…and didn’t have anything much besides himself.”

Mulder swallowed, closing his eyes.  “Did you…?  Is that when you…slept with him?”

Danny sighed.  “Yeah, there was kind of an instant understanding that we would,” he said.  Mulder found himself grinding his teeth.  “But I was his rebound guy.  I got that pretty early on.”

“Rebound from who?” Mulder asked, his eyes popping open.

Danny smiled sadly, meeting Mulder’s gaze with weighted emotion.  “Not from who.  From his arm being cut off.”

Mulder concentrated on breathing, trying not to feel nauseous.

“I’m sure part of it was you,” Danny went on.

Mulder shut his eyes again, trying to comprehend what he was being told.

“He didn’t talk about you that first time, but soon enough he’d bring you up in work related conversation.  I know competition when I see it.”

Mulder looked up at Danny and Danny winked at him, letting Mulder know he wasn’t issuing a challenge of any kind.

“And I didn’t want to marry him or anything.  Alex set some pretty rigorous boundaries that I respected.”  Danny sighed.  “He didn’t tell me then, that first night, but it was the first time he’d had sex since it happened to him,” Danny continued.  “And it felt like he was proving something.  Not that I minded.”  His smile turned a little mischievous.  “The next time I saw him, he had the tattoo.”

Mulder gasped.  The tattoo.  His tattoo.

“Yeah, it’s kind of a big Fuck You to the world I think,” Danny said.

“Do you know what the design means?” Mulder asked, finally finding his tongue.

“Nope.  Never told me,” said Danny.  “It’s hot, though, huh?”

Mulder swallowed.  His breathing was erratic.  He nodded, looking down, but seeing the beautiful rose in his mind’s eye.  “Yeah,” he croaked.  “Yeah, he is.”

Danny laughed a little and Mulder realized what he’d said.  “It’s cool,” Danny told him.  “But hey, aren’t we going to be late for our debriefing?”

Mulder checked his watch again.  Sure enough.  He frowned deeply.  Alex still hadn’t called.  Something was wrong.  It had to be.  Alex may have been a lot of things.  But thoughtless wasn’t one of them.  In fact, Mulder realized, the other man was extremely thought*ful*.

“Flights can be delayed, Mulder,” Danny assured him, but it didn’t wipe the frown from his face even when he nodded.

They got up to go to the meeting, lifting Langly’s headphones off his ear to yell that it was time.

………..

The meeting had gone fine.  Mulder was told.

“It’s seven forty-five,” he said loudly, pacing the living room floor.  “He was supposed to call an hour and fifteen minutes ago.”

“Maybe he was hungry when he got off the plane…went to get some chow,” Langly put in.

“No,” Danny said softly.  “Mulder’s right.  It’s been too long.”

“Shit, what am I thinking?” Mulder breathed,  looking around frantically for his cell phone suddenly.  Frohike spotted it and handed it to Mulder who took it quickly, pressing speed dial one.  “Fuck,” he hissed after a minute.  “Fuck!”

“What is it?” asked Danny.

“Out of service,” he announced.

“Shit,” the other man cursed quietly.

“What can we do?” asked Frohike.

Mulder shook his head.  “I have to go find him.”

Danny piped up.  “We’re not even sure anything truly bad has happened yet.  It could be something we’re not thinking of.  If he calls at nine o’clock tonight and you’ve taken off…”  He swallowed.  “Not to mention you’re needed here.  And the glaring fact that Alex would probably kill me with his bare hands if he found out I let you leave.  He did tell you to stay put, right?”

Mulder dropped his gaze.  “Yes,” he sighed harshly.  He felt the Gunmen exchange glances.

“Comrade Krycek?” came a shy voice from behind them.  “He is missing?”

Byers approached the boy, calming him again but also making sure he knew not to divulge this information to the rest of the troop.  Mulder watched Danny peer around him to watch as the kid was reassured.

“I should have gone with him,” Mulder lamented angrily.

“You know he can take care of himself,” Danny reminded him.  “He needs you here.  He needs you to get the message ready.”

Mulder sighed.  Then he cursed quietly under his breath.  “I’m, uh…I’m gonna clean up,” he told the others.

Danny nodded.

Langly replied, “All right, man, I’m still full steam ahead.”

Mulder nodded a little dispassionately, grabbed up his cell phone, and headed into the bathroom to shower.

…………

They had the message ready to upload to the hijacked system early the next morning and still Alex had not called.

Mulder hadn’t slept.  He’d only gone to bed around five that morning, having worked through the night with Frohike and Langly sacked out in the sleeper sofa, Byers up with him holding a kind of serene energy around him and making coffee, and Danny asleep in Mulder’s room.

Mulder didn’t know why he’d done it…given Danny his own room.  He’d just known he had to have Alex’s.  And still he had not been able to make himself go in there to find it empty.  He’d caught himself staring at the open door countless times with Byers jarring him out of his mood with a nudge and a steaming mug.

He’d tried Alex’s cell upwards of fifty times.  Always the same thing.  Danny had gone to bed around two with a brief hand on his shoulder.  “He’ll come back to you,” he said.

He’ll come back to you.

Come back to what?

Mulder’s heart hurt with all that he hadn’t told the other man…all that he wanted to tell him now.  Jesus, he’d been such a pussy when he’d left!  A smile and a nod?  When what he’d really wanted to do was to hold onto him tight, to feel him pressed so hard against his own body that it reached the point of pain.  And he’d wanted, so badly, to kiss him.  Just throw caution to the wind and kiss him in front of everyone.

He felt he’d give anything to get to do that over.  Or just…fuck, have him right here right now…to show him everything.  If what Danny had said was all true…God, what were they waiting for?

When Mulder had dragged himself to bed, it was with tears hanging precariously in his eyes.  The silence in the place was eerie.  Not the one he was used to sharing with Alex.  He walked into Alex’s small room and looked at the yoga mat.

You do yoga, Krycek?

One tear fell and he shut the door behind him, laying down on the mat fully clothed.  Part of him wanted to get undressed, all the way, to be naked in Alex’s room, feel that scratchy blanket against his skin and pretend it was the kiss of Alex’s five o’clock shadow.

He had no idea what that would feel like, he realized.  He had no idea who Alex was as a lover.  He wanted, very badly, to find out.

He’d not slept, of course.  He’d just laid there in Alex’s room, smelling him.

It was seven o’clock and Langly wanted to know if he should go ahead with the signal.

“No,” said Mulder tiredly.  “Not til Alex gets back.”  He walked over to the coffee maker. “Besides, if Alex has regrouped with L.A., they’ll need to be brought up to speed.”

He knew there was no regrouping with L.A.  He fucking knew.  But he had to say it.  Though the others were beginning to share looks when they thought he wasn’t aware.  Looks that suggested he was making biased decisions. He knew he wasn’t.  He knew after a certain amount of time he’d send it regardless.  He’d assume Alex wasn’t coming back.  Wasn’t coming home.  It wasn’t time yet.

He took his coffee back into Alex’s room where he sat staring at the wall for half an hour more.

“Hey…Mulder?”

It was Danny poking his head in.  Mulder blinked his gaze to the other man.

“I think it would help if you spoke to the troops.”

Mulder let out a sick laugh.  “And tell them that Alex Krycek might be dead but we have to press on like good little soldiers?”

Danny crossed his arms.  “Yes.”

Mulder’s eyes shot to the other man.  “What?”

“Well, they need to know you haven’t abandoned them.”

Mulder sighed.  He had a vicious headache and closed his eyes against it.  He breathed deeply.  “I know.”  He looked back up at Danny with bleary eyes.  “I’m sorry.”

Danny came into the room and shut the door.  He sighed thoughtfully and then sat cross-legged across from Mulder.  “You’re a good motivator, aren’t you?”

Mulder shrugged.

“I can see it,” Danny went on unperturbed by Mulder’s ambivalence. “But who motivates you?”

Mulder was embarrassed to feel the tears start.  He wiped at them quickly, a nervous, sad laugh bubbling up out of him.

“You’re an asshole,” he told Danny, still wiping, his laugh dying slowly and painfully.

“Alex never told you how he felt about you at all?” Danny asked, leaning his forearms on his knees and tilting his head.

“I don’t think fluttering his insanely long lashes at me counts,” Mulder scoffed.

“Are you kidding?” snorted Danny.  “That’s his mating call.”

Mulder looked at Danny with wide eyes, and then he laughed, a wet, snotty one.  He wiped his nose and Danny looked around for some Kleenex.

“No tissues in this place,” Danny complained.

“Alex doesn’t ever cry,” Mulder said and sniffed.

Danny answered softly, “How do you know…unless you come in here with him?”

Mulder swallowed, the words hitting like fists, and a sob tore its way from his throat.

Alex in here…closing his door…no longer the bad ass, the fighter, not anything except his pain.  It hurt too much.

Mulder covered his face, holding his breath and then letting it out shakily, swallowing down the rest of his emotion.  He wiped his cheeks once more and put the image away as best he could.

He focused on now.  On what he had to do.  Danny was right that he could motivate these people.  But it would be hard not knowing where Alex was.  Or if he was even still alive.  God, what if he just…never came back?  Could he do this without Alex by his side?  Did he even want to?

Keep him alive.  If he dies, the whole world can go fuck itself for all I care.

Maybe Alex really would understand.

But it’s not what he’d want.

Mulder sighed and stood.  “I’d better hit the Dolly Madison first…if I’m gonna give a pep talk,” he stated, holding a hand out to Danny.

The other man hesitated and then took it, letting Mulder pull him off the floor.

Mulder went directly to the bathroom and washed his face.  He looked like shit.  It was hard not to start crying again when he looked in the mirror.  But he pulled it together, toweling his face dry and exiting quickly, decidedly.

He poured another cup of coffee, the first having gone cold.  Then he ripped open some raspberry zingers and crammed a whole one into his mouth.  When he finished chewing he looked at Vladi.  “Translate for me again?”  Some of the men didn’t know the more complex English words and the kid had done a fair job getting Mulder’s point across for him the last time.  The kid nodded, looking pleased to have a purpose.  “How old are you?” Mulder asked suddenly.

“Twenty,” Vladi answered, raising his chin.  Mulder didn’t know whether to be impressed with the Brit’s…virility…or kind of repulsed.  Since the kid seemed to have liked the older man, Mulder decided it wasn’t his place to judge.

“Let’s go,” he said to the rest, and they made their way next door.

………

He’d not let on that Alex was missing.  They’d had questions about the releasing of the message and he’d told them they were going to wait for Los Angeles to come back on-line.  He’d further informed them on the use of the vaccine.  They were told how they could use it to cure those already infected with the virus once the bees were released.  Everyone would be given several syringes.  It was their power even more than their guns.

Mulder left them looking like they felt empowered…looking hopeful.  He’d gotten a smile from Danny on his way out.  He’d returned it wanly.

At one o’clock that afternoon, Mulder’s cell phone rang.  It was in his hand, as it pretty much had lived there for the last twenty-four hours.   He raised it with a gasp, eyes wide with fear and hope.

“Hello?” he answered frantically.  The whole room was holding its breath with him.

“Mr. Mulder?  This is Fran Burke.  I’m calling for Danny.  His voicemail keeps picking up.  Is he there?”

Mulder’s heart fell.  He couldn’t even tell the woman to hold for Danny, just dropping his arm and then holding the cell out to the other man.  “You need to turn your cell on,” he said, looking at the ground.

Once the man had taken his phone, Mulder walked away.  He put his hands over his eyes.  Then he yelled…angry and haunted by horrid thoughts he couldn’t seem to stop.  He ripped at his shirt and kicked Alex’s computer chair.  “Goddamnit!”  He kicked it again, launching it across the room.  “GODDAMNIT, ALEX!”

“Mulder, easy!” Danny shouted.  “Call you back, Fran.”

The other man was at his side, but Mulder held his hand out.  “I’m okay.  I’m sorry.”  He looked at around the room without looking into anybody’s eyes.  “I’m sorry.  I’m gonna…I’m gonna lie down.”

He went into Alex’s room and collapsed on the yoga mat.  He slept fitfully for a short time, maybe an hour, not feeling the least refreshed when his demanding bladder finally pushed him up and out of the room.

When he emerged it was to Langly jamming away at the computer keys, Byers and Frohike washing dishes for him, and Danny teaching Vladi how to play poker across the coffee table.

“Here, no, it’s okay,” Danny was saying.  “Two pair should beat four of a kind.”

Mulder cleared his throat.  Everyone turned.  “The invasion is five and a half days away,” he told them somberly  He swallowed thickly.  “If Alex isn’t back in three days…we’ll send the signal anyway.”  He couldn’t bring himself to say ‘without him.’

He nodded at nothing, and then went into the bathroom to take a long shower, washing away new tears that wouldn’t seem to stop.

………

Two days later, Mulder’s mood was like a disease sitting in the room with them.  The others were trying to hold it together.  They kept him eating a little bit, made him take a shower once, though he only stood under the spray.

Somehow he kept talking to their soldiers.  He summed up something from the very soles of his boots and gave them hope.  Danny always smiled at him afterward.

Mulder had not abused anymore chairs.  He tweaked the message with Langly and they started talking about hacking FEMA.

Tomorrow, Mulder thought.  I have to give up on him tomorrow.  I’m on my own tomorrow.  That’s when my life changes.

Danny had turned out to be a Godsend.  He seemed to understand when Mulder needed space, gently prodding him toward Alex’s bedroom for a rest a couple of times.  He’d made fast friends with the Gunmen, chatting it up with the three of them on any number of their favorite subjects.  He’d gone on the errands with Frohike, helping cook and clean sometimes as well.

But it was with Vladi that Danny really seemed to be most comfortable.  The two of them had hit it off and could be found playing poker or talking or just sitting together throughout any given day.  Mulder watched them talking…the way their eyes sparked when they laughed or the way Danny subtly took Vladi out of Byers’ care and established that he was the one Vladi could come to when the kid despaired or was lonely.

They’d become a pair.  A matched set.  Unlikely…the thirty-something American scientist and the young Russian wanna-be soldier.  But a couple none-the-less.  And the sexual tension between them was more than obvious, even to Mulder who was more or less out of it these days.

They just…worked.

And Mulder would sometimes watch Danny put his arm around the kid when he got sleepy and just hold him for an hour before they got ready for bed.  They hadn’t snuck away to a quiet room yet, but Mulder sensed it was only a matter of time.

And respect for Mulder.  Who’d lost a lover he’d never had.

That night, Frohike and Langly were talking over each other, both trying to teach Vladi how best to make macaroni and cheese with the kid looking on in almost scared awe.

Byers was over at the other building helping with the army’s meal.

That left Mulder and Danny sitting together on the couch. Danny was attempting to read over some papers Fran had faxed him about the vaccine, but Mulder could tell he wasn’t into it.  He knew, as Mulder did, that Alex was losing time.

“Do you love him?”

Danny’s eyes shot a little fearfully toward Vladi.  Mulder found the strength to smirk.

“No.  Alex,” he corrected.

Danny sighed in relief, blushing. “Oh.”  He looked down at his lap.  He shook his head.  “I love him.”  He looked up.  “But I’m not in love with him.”

“Is he in love with you?” Mulder pressed, searching Danny’s eyes.

Danny laid a hand over Mulder’s thigh.  It was his turn to smirk.  “Now what do you think?”

“Don’t fuck with me, Danny, dammit,” Mulder pleaded, on the verge of hopeless sobs.

“Shit, I’m sorry.”  Danny scooted over quickly and took Mulder into his arms for a fierce hug.  “No, Mulder.  Alex is not in love with me.  I’ll leave it to him to tell you he’s madly in love with you, all right?  When he gets back.  Okay Mulder?  When he gets back.”

Mulder sniffed, the tears finally falling unchecked against Danny’s shoulder.

“He’s a survivor,” Danny whispered into his hair.  “It’s what he does.  He’s out there surviving.”

Mulder nodded.  “Thank you,” he murmured through the last of his tears.

“Mr. Mulder?”  came Vladi’s soft voice.  “Is he okay, Danny?”

“Yeah, sweetie,” Danny answered.  “Even heroes ball their eyes out.”

Mulder laughed self-consciously into Danny’s now-wet shirt.  Then he pulled away.  Vladi had been lured away again by the dueling chefs.

“And no, I didn’t just decide that myself,” Danny told him.  “Though I would have by now.  Alex is the one who told me you were a hero, Mulder.”

Mulder chuffed an amazed laugh.  “Why isn’t he in love with you?” Mulder asked with a sad smirk.

Danny laughed.  “Oh, honey.  He and I wouldn’t last a day as real lovers.  I’m about as thrill-seeking as Tipper Gore.” He sighed.  “No, I think I wanna tame that one and take him home with me,” Danny finished, nodding over to the sweet, little Russian being attacked between Mulder’s two macaroni cook-off geeks.  “And Alex…  I’ve never seen anyone wanna be with someone so bad as that man wants to be with you.”

“God…”  Mulder breathed.  “I want him, too.  Danny, what the hell am I going to do if…if he’s…?”

He couldn’t finish because his cell phone rang.

He reached quickly for the coffee table and almost knocked it off the other side in his haste.  He hit the green button.  “Hello?!” he practically sobbed.

“Mulder…”  The voice stroked over him like pure joy.  “It’s…”

“Alex!” he yelled.

The room came alive, everyone running over with a whooping yell.  Danny waved his hand, shushing so Mulder could hear.

“Alex!  What happened?  Where are you?”  Mulder had to work at controlling himself.  He wanted to burst into happy sobs.

“God, Mulder…  It’s fucking good to hear your voice.”

“Are you hurt?!  Alex, Jesus, we thought…”

“I know,” Alex murmured through a dry throat.  “I’m okay.  My plane went down.  They tried to hijack it, Mulder.  Two oil-possessed men.  And I couldn’t get to the vaccine.  I had to kill them.  The plane went down.  I parachuted.  Are you okay?”

Mulder laughed, sick and giddy.  “I’m fine!  You said you’re not hurt?”

“No.  I’m okay.  Just…I landed in the woods, Mulder.  I had to walk for three days to get here.  I’m in fucking Tennessee.”

Mulder laughed again.  Tennessee.  It wasn’t funny.  But it was.  His voice…it just felt so good…washing over him after days of not having it.  Better than wine.  Better than anything.

“Tell me where you are, I’ll come get you.”

Danny shook his head at the same time Alex snarled, “No, Mulder.  You stay put, you hear me?  Who else is there?”

“I’ll go,” Danny interjected, nodding at Mulder.

“Danny says he’ll go,” Mulder said.

“Good.  Okay,” Alex said.  “I have to…go get some water…  Mulder?”

“Yeah, Alex?” Mulder breathed.

“Shit…”  Alex whispered.

“I know,” Mulder whispered back, the tears welling and distorting his vision.  “Come home.”  He closed his eyes.  “Just come home.”

………

Mulder and Danny hand-picked a team to fly Danny to Tennessee to get Alex.  Two of the six were pilots and all of them were huge, hulking men, all muscle, and very ready and able to fight to keep their leaders alive.  Whereas Alex had taken two, Mulder sent six.  And all within their one, tight-knit cell.  Everyone going would be one of their own camp…and all of them, of course, vaccinated.  No chance of infection.  They were sworn to secrecy, as well, not permitted to let the others of the group know what mission they’d been sent out on.

“Be careful,” Mulder told Danny as he prepared to go.

“I’ll bring him back to you,” Danny promised Mulder, squeezing Mulder’s arm before turning amidst his gigantic bodyguards and leaving.

Mulder found himself rushing to get ready, showering so fast he barely got wet, before he realized he was going to be doing an awful lot of waiting.

Clean, dressed, fed, kind of…Mulder found himself at a loss for something to do.  He did his daily talk with the soldiers, giving them a morale heightening speech that inspired all to applaud at the end.

He came back to the main building surrounded by his own new team of bodyguards, three of them whom he made sleeping room for in the living room, dragging in more cots and lining them up next to Vladi’s.

Vladi.  He was without Danny for now.  Mulder suddenly frowned, looking around himself and finding the young man swiveling morosely in a computer chair.  His eyelids were drooping.

“He refuses to sleep,” Byers whispered.

“Hey…Vladi…”  Mulder called softly.

The young man looked up at him with such sad, worried eyes that it very nearly broke Mulder’s only-just-mended heart.

“Why don’t you go lie down in Danny’s room?”  Mulder suggested gently.

The kid sniffed, rubbing his eyes like a child, and nodded.  “Thank you, sir.”

Mulder sighed in relief, then he leaned down and whispered, “You can call me Fox if you want.”

The boy’s eyes brightened.  “Danny said…”

“I know.  It’s okay.  I’d like you to,” Mulder said, realizing he did.

The kid nodded again, eyes hardly able to stay open now, and Mulder smiled as he dragged himself out of the main room, closing the door behind himself once inside what Mulder once thought of as his room.

He hoped it wouldn’t be after tonight.

Six hours.  Six fucking hours.  Until finally the bell went off signaling their approach.  It was two in the morning.

Vladi came barreling out of the bedroom, hair in complete disarray, one leg of his boxer shorts hitched high up on his leg.  The Gunmen, Langly and Frohike on the sleeper sofa tonight and Byers taking his turn on a cot, all sat up groggily.

Mulder’s bodyguards came to attention.

Mulder stood in the middle of the room, feeling like he was having a heart attack.

The car lights shone into the small windows.  Then doors slammed.  The sound of booted feet.  Then the door…opening.

Bodyguards…bustling in and Mulder craned his neck to see…  Danny…more bodyguards.  And then…

“Alex…”

He came through the others like a mythic thing.  So here.  So beautiful.  Alive.  So alive.

“Alex…”

“Mulder…”

“God, Alex…”

Mulder stepped forward quickly as Alex disentangled himself from the mass of bodyguards surrounding him in the crowded space.  They came toward each other in the middle of the living room, nearing…both breathing heavily.  They stopped just short of touching.

Mulder searched Alex’s face, his hands lifting, hesitating.  Alex swallowed.  And without deciding on it, they fell into each other’s arms.

Mulder’s arms went around Alex’s shoulders like steel bands, and Alex’s one flesh arm grabbed Mulder in hard, their faces pressed into each other’s necks.

Fucking God…  Mulder felt like he might faint.  He held his breath, trying not to cry, then let his breath out against Alex’s hot skin.  He held him tighter and felt Alex’s arm tighten around him as well.

“Jesus, Alex,” he whispered.

Alex growled into his neck and squeezed him painfully.  Just like Mulder wanted.  God, he was everything he wanted.  He had it all…here in his arms.

They stayed, holding strong to each other’s bodies for a long time, their breath hard and shivering.

Finally, Mulder released his clutching hold on the other man and leaned back enough to take his face between his hands.  He leaned his forehead on Alex’s and swallowed thickly.  The face beneath his fingers and palms sported a three-day-old growth of beard.  Mulder smiled, afraid to open his eyes and see how beautiful Alex was.  How real.  He just wanted to feel it.

His hands sifted up into Alex’s hair and tangled there.  Alex’s hand pressed into Mulder’s lower back, melding them together in a marriage of bodies that seemed as intimate as sex.

Mulder ached to kiss him.  He licked his lips with wanting it.  But he realized they were not alone.  So very not alone.  And he finally opened his eyes and drew back a little.  He looked into Alex’s eyes, fearing the intensity of it, and saw that the other man’s eyes were wet like his own.  He smiled.  Alex blinked at him and dropped his hand to take Mulder’s, gently entwining their fingers together.  Mulder closed his eyes and squeezed the hand in his.

Then he turned sheepishly to peer around Alex’s shoulder at the others, who, to their credit, tried to look like they hadn’t been staring.

Frohike -- of course, Mulder thought – thought nothing of breaking the moment.

“Dude, you look like hillbillies attacked you or you got chewed on by possums or something.”

“A possum in Tennessee is a dead possum, Melvin,” Langly chided.

The group finally pressed in on the two of them with their questions, ranging from ‘How’d you kill the hijackers?’ to ‘Did you subsist on twigs and berries?’ to ‘Did you think you were gonna die?’

“I couldn’t die,” Alex answered roughly.  “I had to come home.”  He squeezed Mulder’s hand surreptitiously and Mulder swallowed back the overwhelming excitement of standing next to him again…feeling that calloused hand in his.

“Dude, what happened to your arm?”

Once again, Frohike.

Mulder glanced around, frowning.  He hadn’t noticed, but Alex’s prosthetic was, in fact,  gone.

Alex shrugged his left shoulder mildly.  “It got ripped off when I was fighting the hijackers.  I didn’t have time to get it before I jumped.”

“Harsh,” Frohike announced and Langly elbowed him.

Alex smiled over at Mulder.  “I’ll get a new one,” he said.

“Sir…”  Vladi said, stepping forward from Danny’s side and interrupting the two men’s moment of just looking at each other.  “The troops can’t wait to see you,” the boy told him, blushing furiously.

Alex smirked tiredly.  “They can wait.”  And this time when Alex squeezed Mulder’s hand, it sent an illicit thrill through his body that rivaled some orgasms he’d had in his lifetime.  “I haven’t slept in days.  And I stink.”

Vladi smiled and ducked his head.  Danny ruffled his hair affectionately.

Mulder took a step back, disengaging from Alex’s warm hand.  He felt his breathing get faster, knowing what he was about to do.  He said nothing as he moved away.

Danny piped up.  “Langly, why don’t you guys get going with the encryption codes on FEMA.  We’ll wanna be ready by morning.”

Mulder walked backward a few steps and then turned, slowly making his way toward Alex’s room, though he wanted to run.  He stopped in the doorway, hearing the rest of their little group now excitedly bustling to start their assorted projects, everyone excited to feel like they could move forward again.  Mulder turned sideways in the door, shyly lifting his eyes and finding Alex.  He blinked, holding the look for a moment, seeing the other man swallow and then part his lips on a gasp of recognition, before Mulder moved into the room, leaving the door slightly ajar.

He waited, hardly breathing.  He backed into the middle of the room, chest aching with want and cock hard in his pants.  He didn’t know what to do with his hands so he clenched them into fists at his sides.

He felt Alex before he saw him…that strong, unique energy just on the other side of the door.  Then his shadow darkening it, making Mulder inhale sharply.  Alex pushed open the door and locked eyes with him as he came in cautiously, and then, meaningfully, closed the door behind him.

Mulder let him take an unsure step forward, the wet, green eyes blinking madly at him in the low light of Alex’s one lamp.  Then Mulder curled a hand around the back of Alex’s head and yanked him in, pressing his mouth to Alex’s, opening the lips under his and pushing his tongue inside on a harsh breath.

Alex’s hand came up and gripped Mulder’s hair in a tight fist as he shoved his tongue into Mulder’s mouth and kissed him back.

Mulder attacked his mouth in return, pushing Alex’s back up against the wall hard and groaning.

Alex’s hand was immediately working Mulder’s shirt out of his pants and bunching it up his body.  Mulder only broke the kiss to rip it off over his head and then surge back into Alex, grinding himself against the hard, hot body he’d longed to feel for so long now.  He kissed him savagely, growling and biting and thrusting his tongue in deep, running his hands over Alex’s torso a little wildly, scratching and clawing to try to get under and feel skin.

Alex took over and ripped his own shirt off, almost angrily throwing it off to the side, breath seething through gritted teeth as his eyes stalked Mulder’s panting mouth.  Suddenly, Alex came away from the wall, seeming to swell with the immediacy of his arousal.

He reached out and took Mulder by the waistband of his pants, jerking him in, pulling a little grunt from Mulder’s throat before Alex unbuttoned the jeans and then worked the zipper down. He slid his hand around Mulder’s waist, holding his body in close.  Alex tilted his head, swiping at Mulder’s mouth with his tongue before snarling and tongue-fucking Mulder’s mouth thoroughly, almost abusively claiming him.  Their chests pressed together and Mulder got his hands in between their bodies enough to get Alex’s jeans open, pushing them down his hips without finesse.

“Awwwmmm,” Alex moaned, gripping Mulder’s hair again and yanking to the side, attacking the tendon in Mulder’s neck hungrily, then eating across his swallowing throat to the other side and then licking and biting down to the curve where Mulder’s neck became his shoulder.

Mulder nearly yelped when he felt Alex’s hand grip the back of his jeans and jerk down.  He felt his jeans slip down his ass a little ways along with his underwear.

Alex growled, “Take ‘em off.”

Mulder did, struggling out of them and standing back up nude, breathing hard and aroused and scared before Alex.

Alex’s eyes traveled down Mulder’s body, their green swallowed by the heated black.  Mulder was achingly hard, trembling with lust and need.  Alex swallowed hard as his eyes found Mulder’s again, and Mulder watched as he started working his own jeans down off his hips, stripping them down the strong thighs, one side at a time until they were off along with this boots and socks.

Mulder was treated to his first view of Alex’s cock as he straightened.  It was thick and pulsing deep pink, oozing pre-cum from the tip.  Mulder watched the drop pool and then slip over the head, running down his shaft.  He swallowed convulsively.

Alex took a step back in, the fire still flaring brightly behind his eyes even as his touch gentled and he cupped Mulder’s face.  Mulder’s cock twitched at the profoundly tender caress and his erection bumped Alex’s as the other man stepped in close.

Alex gasped, eyes closing.  Then he pressed in, aligning his body with Mulder’s as his hand held the back of Mulder’s head and Alex kissed him again.

Mulder whined into it, the feeling of their naked bodies so completely touching one another, cocks trapped into an embrace of their own, a pleasure beyond naming.  Alex’s kiss was deep and slow.  Mulder settled his own hands on Alex’s hips and felt the other, bigger man shudder at his touch.

He felt Alex backing up a little but pulling Mulder along with him.  Then he was being turned, like a slow dance, trading places with his partner.  Alex’s hand took Mulder’s right shoulder from behind and pulled gently, turning Mulder’s body, breaking their kiss, and before Mulder knew it, he was pressed against the wall, the whole front of his body flush to it as Alex maneuvered in behind him, breath hot on the back of his neck.

Oh God…that weeping, towering cock nudging his asscheeks apart.  And Alex’s chest and belly pressing to Mulder’s bare back.  Mouth in his hair.  Hand finding Mulder’s…lifting it…sliding it up the wall and then holding it there with his own.

Oh fucking God…

Mulder was about to get fucked.

He wondered if he should tell Alex it was going to be his first time.

Some little part of him thrilled to life and caused his heart to pound harder against his ribs as he considered keeping quiet.  Mulder wanted to know what Alex was like…wanted to know his raw desperation and the feel of Alex’s cock penetrating him unadulterated by the knowledge of Mulder’s virginity.

But another part wanted Alex to know it and revel in it…to have him know what he was doing with every inch that pushed inside.

“Alex…”  Mulder breathed.

“Ahgod,” Alex moaned, rubbing himself between the cheeks of Mulder’s ass.  He tilted his head and mouthed at the back of Mulder’s neck.  “What?” he whispered.

Mulder took a breath and held it.  Then he whispered back, “Fuck me.”

Alex groaned and thrust hard, bucking Mulder’s body against the wall once.  Then Alex raised Mulder’s arms up high over his head, one by one, pressing his wrists into the wall together before stroking his hand down Mulder’s forearms, his bicep, his armpit, his side, his hip, drifting deliciously over his ass once.  Mulder leaned his forehead against the wall and left his arms up, breathing shakily.

He felt Alex reach away for a moment and turned his head, opening his eyes to see Alex squirt out some lotion from the pump by his yoga mat.  Then he was working his dick behind Mulder, moaning at his own touch.  Mulder thought it was the sexiest thing he’d ever known.

“I’m clean,” Alex murmured in his ear.

Mulder nodded, fingers curling into fists, ready to feel Alex’s cock opening him up at any moment.  Instead, it was the tip of one square finger that petted and stroked his asshole open, twisting as it sank inside, slippery and warm and so good it made Mulder throw his head back and howl.

Mulder’s arms started to relax.  His whole body was shaking.

“Not yet,” Alex murmured.  “God, like this…  Like this, Mulder.”

Mulder raised his arms again, feeling taken and yearning for more.  And then Alex was finger fucking him so smooth and wonderful Mulder worried he was going to come soon.

“Alex…” he gasped.  “Oh Alex…”  He realized he was moving his hips along with Alex’s easy thrusts.

Alex growled behind him, quickening his strokes and it was Mulder’s turn to gasp.

He worked Mulder’s ass for a moment longer, the slight friction burn letting up when Alex slowly, deftly withdrew his finger.

It was then that Mulder felt the much more substantial push of Alex’s cockhead at his loosened hole.  Alex’s erection was well-lubed with lotion but still the cockhead stretching Mulder wide to accommodate its girth made Mulder catch his breath.

The fat cockhead wasn’t even pushed all the way in when Alex reached up and took hold of Mulder’s wrists in his one, strong hand.  Mulder whimpered and Alex took a few, short, labored breaths.  Then he began to drive himself home up Mulder’s ass.

“Ahhhh…” Mulder gritted out, squeezing his eyes closed.

Alex squeezed his wrists as he sank in…finally settling against Mulder’s ass with an indescribable whimper.  It made Mulder’s cock twitch to be touched.  As if by telepathy, Alex then roughly brought one of Mulder’s arms down, placing Mulder’s hand on his own untouched cock.  Alex then reached up, still buried in Mulder’s aching bottom, and brought the other hand down as well, pushing it between Mulder’s crotch and the wall.  Mulder groaned,  holding himself as Alex had wordlessly instructed, one hand gripping his own cock loosely, the other squeezing his balls.

Alex then pulled partway out and slid back inside.  Mulder moaned as he was pushed forward, braced on his shoulders, pressed into his own familiar touch as Alex’s cock held him tightly against the wall.

“OhMulder,” Alex moaned.  He took several heavy breaths.

Mulder widened his legs a little more and adjusted his hands between them.

“God yeah,” Alex breathed.  “Do yourself.”

And then Alex started to fuck him, shoving into his ass and grunting, his forehead resting on the back of Mulder’s head.  Mulder milked his own cock, trying only to tease it, not stroking too hard or too fast.  But then Alex was doing him harder, whipping his hips and bumping Mulder’s prostate repeatedly.

Mulder whined, head dropping back onto Alex’s left shoulder as he cried and let go of any control he was trying to have, his own hand working his dick up to a volcanic orgasm that erupted from his cock and ripped from his throat as he bucked against Alex’s continued thrusts.

“Fffuuuuckkk,” Alex gritted as Mulder came.

Mulder spilled out onto the wall, eyes tearing with the power of his release, and Alex began to lose rhythm behind him.

“Ohgod…ohgod…” Alex groaned.  And then he was gasping, trembling, as his cock emptied powerfully inside Mulder.  He was deep inside and just grinding against Mulder’s ass as he panted and moaned out his climax, stilling as he finally finished, body pinning Mulder’s to the wall as they both breathed.

Alex panted into Mulder’s neck.  Mulder felt like he wanted to just slip down the wall into a formless puddle on the floor.  He waited, thrumming, for Alex’s cock to go soft and slip out of him.  It took a while, but then he felt Alex shift away from him and pull out.  Mulder inhaled sharply.

“Sorry,” Alex murmured behind him.

Why the fuck was that man sorry?

Mulder turned. He took Alex behind the head, thumbing his jaw.  He smiled at the other man, though there was a sheen of tears glazing Mulder’s eyes.  “Get back in here so I can kiss you,” he breathed.

Mulder blinked at Alex slowly once, and Alex sighed shudderingly, taking a step back in and covering Mulder’s mouth with his own.  Mulder immediately licked his way inside, touching his tongue to Alex’s and working a moan from his lover’s throat.

He pressed into Alex’s body with his own, wrapping his arms around him and holding him tightly, changing the angle of the kiss and licking deeper, slower…making Alex as much his as Alex had just made Mulder.

“Let me go feed you,” Mulder whispered against Alex’s lips as he continued to nibble them tenderly, retilting his head this way and that.

Alex moaned against him.  “I don’t want to let go of you.”  He kissed Mulder deeply, sustaining one, long, passionate kiss before pulling reluctantly away. “I thought I’d never get to hold you.”

Mulder kissed the corner of his mouth, his jaw.  “I know.”  Then he held Alex in a crushing grip again, resting his chin on the other man’s shoulder.  He sighed, “I know, Alex.”

They stayed like that for a long moment.

“Mulder…” Alex said, then.

“What?”

“I’m gonna fall down.”

It was only then that Mulder remembered what Alex had been through.  He’d walked for three days to get back to him.  And he’d fucked Mulder standing up, a thoughtful, sensitive lover, seeing to Mulder’s needs and getting him ready for their first time with one another even though he was exhausted, malnourished, dehydrated, and…well, filthy, Mulder realized.  He hadn’t cared and still didn’t.  But Alex probably did.

“Do you think you can make it through a shower while I fix you something?” Mulder asked, leaning back but still holding Alex.  The other man was trembling slightly.

Alex nodded.  “I’m sorry I’m so…”

“Don’t apologize,” Mulder whispered.  “I’d love you if you were covered in shit, Alex.”

Alex gasped.  And then he laughed.  Mulder shrugged, tears prickling his nose and throat.  God, it had felt so amazing to say it.  To mean  it.  Alex looked at him like he was some amazing and incomprehensible puzzle.

“Macaroni and cheese?” Mulder asked, drunk on his confession and their naked bodies.

Alex swallowed and nodded.  Then he kissed Mulder so fiercely it was painful.  Wonderfully painful.  Mulder was released breathless and Alex turned to redress.  Mulder got his clothes back on, too.  He moved toward the door, reluctant to leave Alex for any length of time now that he was home.  But he put his hand on the knob anyway.

“…love you…” came the choked whisper behind him, almost not there.  Mulder closed his eyes, the relief flooding him.  He was surprised at how much he realized he’d wanted to hear it.  He turned back to Alex.

“Covered in shit?” he asked, eyebrows raised.

Alex blinked rapidly.  “Covered in shit,” he answered.

Mulder took a deep breath, then he pulled on the knob and walked back out into the main room.

The music was practically blaring.  He hadn’t noticed, whatwith being too busy losing his virginity and all.  He smiled a little evilly, watching their friends keep nearly maniacally busy to give them some modicum of privacy in the communal space.

Their friends…

Mulder looked around at them all.  They’d taken up for his slack when he’d thought Alex might be dead.  They’d kept him going.  He couldn’t believe he deserved such loyalty and compassion.  He pushed off the closed door and made his way to the small kitchen.  Danny turned on the couch, cell phone to his ear, and smiled at Mulder.  Mulder smiled back.

Mulder heard the door open behind him and turned to see Alex, shaky with exhaustion.  Their eyes met and Mulder sipped his breath in with the intimacy of that connection now.  At the same time, he realized Alex didn’t look like he could stand anymore at all, filth be damned.  But he also knew Alex wouldn’t want the others to see him leaning on Mulder just to make it to the bathroom.  Mulder bit his lip and gave Alex a warm smile…a loving smile he realized…and saw it returned, drenched as it was in exhaustion.  Then Mulder turned back to the stove, getting down the box of macaroni, hearing the bathroom door shut behind his prodigal partner.

He heard the water come on while he worked to get something hot and mild for Alex to eat.  The tap never switched to the shower and Mulder hoped that meant Alex had decided to take a bath instead.

Frohike finally turned in his computer chair with an awkward nod to Mulder.  Mulder was sure he looked a little debauched.  He sure felt that way…like he had Alex’s handprint all over him…the imprint of his hungry lips and the claiming bite of his teeth marking him as fucked, loved, and owned.  He knew he probably smelled like Alex’s cum.  It made him smile a little more evilly before he realized the look on his face was cast Frohike’s direction.  The other man frowned a little and turned back to his computer.

Mulder heard him mutter to Langly under his breath, “We gotta get outta here before they try to recruit us.”

Mulder choked on a laugh as he poured the macaroni into his boiling water.

When Alex’s dinner was made and steaming on the stove, the other man had still not emerged from his bath.  Mulder knew he shouldn’t be worried, but Alex had looked so weak…like a newborn foal coming out of that bedroom.  Some Rambo/Bambi hybrid.  Rambi.  Mulder grinned.  But he felt a little guilty that it was partly because of him.  Not that he’d go back and change things.  No way.  But he felt responsible now.  And he longed to go to him…to take care of him…to have an excuse to touch him some more…just to be next to him.

Danny came over once he’d hung up and laid a hand on Mulder’s shoulder.  “Hey,” he said with a gentle smile.  “You need anything?”

Mulder glanced around Danny’s shoulder.  “Where’s Vladi?”

Danny nodded toward the other bedroom door.  “Conked out.”  He smiled.  “Big day.”

“Yeah,” Mulder sighed.  “And another one tomorrow.  Everybody needs to get some sleep.”  He looked around the room.  “Danny, I really appreciate everyone giving us…giving Alex and myself some time to…”

“Happy to,” Danny replied, squeezing Mulder’s shoulder and then releasing it.

“But it’s really late.  And we have a lot to do tomorrow.  Don’t feel like you have to hold down the fort.”

Danny nodded.  “I thought of one more thing I’d like to do for you two before I turn in, though.”

Mulder glanced at the bathroom door again then back to Danny.

“Thought I’d drag in two more cots.  You guys could push them together…”  He shook his head.  “Alex and his damned mat, you’d think he was a monk and took a vow of discomfort or something.”

Mulder had to smile.  Alex really did seem to be quite happy with his mat.  But…sleeping together would be…nice.  The inadequacy of that word…  The very idea of lying down by Alex’s side and holding him as they slept filled Mulder with a warmth and a peace and a feeling of ultimate rightness that brought a lump to this throat.

“Thanks, Danny. I’d really appreciate that.”

“I’m sure he would, too,” Danny said.  “I don’t know that he’s ever let anybody sleep with him.  He probably can’t ask for it, but…he needs it, finally, with you.”  Then Danny leaned in and kissed Mulder’s temple lightly.

Mulder looked at him perplexed for a moment until he saw the wealth of caring in the other man’s face.

“Not hittin’ on ya,” Danny replied with a bright smile.  “Although if I’d met you first…”  He walked away with a wink, leaving Mulder blushing a little.

Mulder turned back toward the bathroom, pensive for a moment, chewing his lip.  Then he left Alex’s dinner cooling a little on the counter and walked toward the silent door.

“Hey, guys,” he called to the Gunmen first.  “It’s late.  Take a load off okay?”  Then he added with a smirk, “And you can turn that music down now.”

They looked at each other like queenless bees and Mulder’s smile widened.  He turned then and faced the bathroom door, knocking lightly.  “Alex?”

No sound from inside.  He bit his lip again, not knowing if becoming Alex’s lover gave him the right to walk in on him in the bathroom or not.  He decided to risk it.  He pushed the door open a little and snuck inside, closing it behind him.

There, in the tub, lay a sleeping Alex submerged to his shoulders in soapy, lavender-scented water.  Mulder felt the smile spread over his face as he looked down at how peaceful his partner looked.  His lips were parted and his lashes lay tranquilly across his pink cheeks.  He’d shaved already.  Mulder smirked.  He was probably one of those people for whom it was a compulsion.  Mulder had liked the rough shadow that had grown there, but he had to admit…it was nice not to have that pretty face covered up.  He looked like a fallen angel.

That still, silent, beautiful man had fucked him against a wall not even twenty minutes ago.  And here he lay so…innocent.

Mulder walked over and crouched by the tub.  He dipped his hand into the water, hesitating, breath a little shallow.  As the suds lapped at his chest, Alex stirred.

He smacked his lips for a moment and then gasped, sitting bolt upright.  Mulder gasped right back, stilling, but when Alex saw him, he blinked a few times and then let all his breath out.  “Mulder…” he said.

“I’m sorry I scared you,” Mulder replied.

“I was asleep?” Alex asked.

Mulder grinned gently.  “Yeah, you were.”

Alex leaned back again and sighed.

“Do you want me to…leave?” Mulder asked.

Alex frowned, eyes closed.  He took a deep breath.  “No,” he breathed.  “I want you to…” he started, taking a breath to keep going,  “Strip off all your clothes and…get in here with me but…”  He swallowed.  “Water’s filthy now.”

Mulder felt his own exhaustion begin to seep into his bones.  “Next time,” he promised.

“Help me out?”  Alex asked, eyes still shut.  How much did it cost him to ask for help like that?  Mulder felt beyond privileged.

“Lean up and hold onto me,” Mulder answered, moving in closer.

Alex opened jade glittering eyes and grasped Mulder’s arm, getting his feet under him and rising up out of the water.

“Hold on and I’ll rinse you,” Mulder told him.

Alex nodded, his hand releasing Mulder to splay on the tile wall.  He was turned partially away from Mulder, head dropped, his muscular back and tight, smooth buttocks presented like fine art for Mulder to appreciate.

He appreciated.  Every time he filled a cup with warm water and held it to Alex’s shoulders and upper back, letting it cascade down, taking the last of the soap and dirt with it…he appreciated.  Mulder let his eyes roam in awe over his lover’s body.  Fucking perfect.

He filled the cup, still staring at Alex’s quivering back, then held it to the nape of his neck and tilted.  It ran down his spine, between his pink, hard asscheeks, down the long legs.

Mulder filled another cup and this time stepped inside the tub himself, fully clothed.  He reached around Alex and tipped the cup down the front of his body, standing slightly on the balls of his feet to watch the water sluice down Alex’s chest, flat belly, over the dark thatch of hair framing his sated cock and heavy balls.  Mulder had never thought of himself as even partly gay before…maybe bicurious…but now he drooled…watching Alex this way, quiet and still for him…nude and allowing Mulder to care for him…

Heady stuff.

Mulder stepped out and held out his arms.  “C’mere,” he called.  Alex turned and took Mulder’s arm again.  Mulder put his free hand on Alex’s waist.  For really no other reason than to get to touch him, but it might seem like he was helping.

Alex stepped over the side and Mulder wordlessly grabbed a towel and began drying him.  He scrubbed his head, jostling the other man a little.  Alex groaned, closing his eyes.  Mulder smiled and stroked the towel down the back of Alex’s neck, massaging his shoulders a little.  He gave his partner a considering look, thinking…  Alex kept his eyes closed, and Mulder stepped around to the side a little, toweling the wet off Alex’s chest now.  He had moved so that he had a nice close-up view of Alex’s left arm and the bold tattoo advertising the scarred stump.

“You checking out my arm, Mulder?” came Alex’s sleepy rumble.

Mulder inhaled and shot his gaze to the other man’s face.  He hesitated, towel still, and then admitted, “Yes.”

Alex said nothing, allowing again with a shaky breath.  Mulder began to dry him once more, soothing over his back, then switching to his belly.  Alex’s lips parted wetly and he reached out to hold onto the wall for support.

“Sorry.  I’ll go faster,” Mulder promised, realizing he’d been taking his time, liking getting to touch Alex so freely and so…naked.

“No…”  Alex breathed, a soft frown clouding his features.  “Go…slow…”

Mulder nodded, though he was concerned Alex was pushing it farther than his body could handle.

Mulder shifted the towel around to Alex’s ass, which was, even to not-quite-bicurious Mulder, mouth-wateringly perfect.  Jesus, God, the man had a fine ass!  Mulder had never seen an ass that made him want to snarl like a beast before.  The women he’d been with had had nice assess, smooth and pale and squeezable.  But Alex…Mulder could barely restrain himself from grabbing it roughly, kneeling to have it right in his face.  He wanted to bite it, lave it, nestle right up into it, pull it open, and thrust his cock into it.    He really felt he could spend hours on Alex’s ass alone.  He’d knead it and pinch it and slap it and suck it and…

Mulder had gotten himself completely hard again just thinking about it.

He stopped massaging Alex’s butt with the towel, sure he may have already chafed it, and worked on Alex’s legs instead, stroking down his thighs and calves with care.

He didn’t think he or Alex could handle any attention given to Alex’s cock right now.  He gave it a lingering look, though, promising it silently that he’d really look forward to getting to know it better.

“All done,” he announced and was surprised to find Alex frowning intensely as he brought his wandering eyes back to his partner’s face.  “Alex?  What’s wrong?”

Alex licked his lips.  “Nothing…” he said, but it was far from true, Mulder could see.

Mulder stroked his hand through Alex’s damp hair.  “Follow me,” he murmured, sliding his hand down and taking Alex’s.

“Mulder…”

“Oh yeah, shit,” Mulder replied, having almost tried to lead Alex out in the buff.  Funny how everything else faded away when he was with Alex.  Their crowded headquarters might as well have been a deserted island.  “Guess we won’t give ‘em a free show, huh?” he smiled.  Alex finally opened his eyes and turned stormy, provocative eyes on him.  “Sit on the toilet,” Mulder instructed.  “I’ll get you some clean things to sleep in.”

He left, closing the door softly behind him on the way out.  He got largely ignored by the Gunmen, except for a small I’m-Okay-With-Your-New-Gayness smile from the ever-considerate Byers.  The others were understandably a little weirded out, Mulder suspected.  But it was more that they had to take this time to assimilate the new information than any real issue with Mulder’s sexuality…or his choice of mate in the form of the mysterious and dangerous Alex Krycek.

Mulder chided them, “Go to sleep,” on his way to Alex’s bedroom.

“All right, geez,” Langly said around a yawn.  “Oh hey Mulder.”

Mulder turned, already halfway through the doorway.  He poked his head back out again.  “Hmm?”

“I thought you’d wanna know, I sent out that spy spam you wanted.”

“Not the bees?” Mulder asked, worried.  That wasn’t until tomorrow on his and Alex’s go ahead.

“No, dude.  The other one.  The Missouri thing?”

“Oh,” Mulder answered.  “Oh, great.”  Then he came back into the room a little ways, not wanting to keep Alex waiting but feeling like he’d waited too long to say something.  “Hey guys?”

“Yeah?” they chorused in perfect unison, none of them blinking an eye at their uniformity.

Mulder smiled.  “I just wanted to say thank you.  For everything.”

The guys all looked puzzled by this.

“We’re livin’ the dream, man,” Langly assured him as if he should have known this already.  “If you didn’t let us do this…we’d be banging down your freakin’ door.”  Then he shut the computer down and they all stood and stretched.

“Another giant leap for kung fu wizards everywhere, gentlemen,” Frohike pronounced.  “Let’s hit the hay and let Mulder make out with his boyfriend some more,” he added.

Mulder’s eyes blinked wider.

Langly laughed as they adjourned to the couch and cot respectively.  “Ten bucks says they’re gonna suck face all night instead of sleep.”

“How ya gonna prove that, Ringo?  Put a camera in real quick?”

“Maybe,” Langly persisted.  “I can hack FEMA, can’t I?”

“You really wanna see what two guys suck?” Frohike pushed.  They weren’t even paying any attention to Mulder any more.

“I could take it.  You’re the one who couldn’t handle it, Melvin.”

“Guys…” Byers tried.

“Ten bucks says I’d last ten minutes,” Frohike challenged.

Guess they’d processed it, Mulder thought with a little snort.  Then he turned and went into the bedroom.  Danny was spreading a sheet across the pushed together cots.

Mulder smiled at him, his pulse quickening at the sight of an actual bed…meant for him and Alex to share.

“You really think he’s gonna be okay with this?” Mulder asked, rummaging through Alex’s things and pulling out a T-shirt and briefs.

“It’s time he got okay with it,” Danny answered.  Then he dusted his hands and passed Mulder on his way out.  “Good-night,  Mulder.  Sleep tight.”

Mulder glanced at the two beds, neither being even as big as a twin.  “Gonna have to,” he answered.

Danny smiled as he left, and Mulder went to fetch Alex.  He was smiling as he returned to the bathroom.

He opened the door this time to find Alex asleep once more, naked and slouched on the toilet seat.  Mulder sighed at the sight.  Then he went over and knelt in front of him, trying to ignore the suggestive posturing.  Take care of him, don’t …‘take care of him,’ he thought.

“Hey…Alex…”

Alex groaned and lifted his head.  “Fuck,” he cursed groggily.  “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be.  Here, lift your foot.”

Mulder helped him into the briefs, only making him stand when he had to to get them all the way up over his luscious ass.  Mulder chided his own thoughts again.  Alex let him get them pulled up, not even opening his eyes.  Mulder then brought the T-shirt up over his head and pulled it down, watching as Alex pushed his arm into the hole and then the stump worked its way in as well.  He’d have to talk to the guys about fixing Alex up with a really nice replacement prosthesis.  Mulder didn’t know why he didn’t have a fancy one in the first place since he had access to all that money.  Maybe an expression of independence.

“Gotta open those pretty eyes now,” Mulder murmured to him, smiling as Alex obeyed.  He looked at Mulder with a little frown, licking his lips.  Did he not like being called pretty?

“Come on,” Mulder sighed, nervous about the room, but feeling the need for a little emotional bravery.

Alex followed him, hand in his, as they left the bathroom and Mulder guided Alex toward his bedroom.  But Alex stopped, almost there, tugging on Mulder’s hand.

“No…” he protested.  “Not yet.”

“What do you mean, not yet?  You’re sleeping on toilets now,” Mulder reminded him gently.

Alex frowned deeply, his throat working.  He wouldn’t look at Mulder.  He nodded jerkily…reluctant, and let Mulder lead him through the door.

Mulder stopped, biting his lip as Alex lifted his gaze and saw the new bed.  Mulder waited, watching carefully.  First, Alex just blinked.  Then he blinked again, his lips parting.

Alex swallowed and a small, inarticulate whisper came out.  It was just almost a whimper.  Mulder watched, amazed, as Alex’s lip began to tremble.  Then he ducked his head, covered his eyes with his hand, and began to sob.

Mulder gasped, stunned by the show of intense emotion from the recalcitrant man.  He reached out, almost afraid to touch him, and laid his hand on Alex’s bicep.  So strong as he hid behind his hand and wept .

“Alex,” Mulder breathed.  “Is it…is it a good thing?” he tried.

Alex just turned toward him, not reaching, not demanding, just silently asking for Mulder.  And Mulder took him into his arms, holding the shaking man.

“Shhh…it’s okay,” he cooed.  He stroked Alex’s back and buried his face in his neck.  “It’s okay.  It’s okay.”  Mulder reached out and pushed the door closed before wrapping his arm around his lover once more.

Alex cried in his arms for a long while, his shaking finally subsiding to a few involuntary hiccups.  Mulder petted his hair.  He held him until the other man began to weakly pull out of the embrace.  He watched Alex wipe at his eyes, sniffing and looking down.

“When did you…do this?” Alex asked around his clogged throat and nose.

“Danny did it,” Mulder told him.  “For us.”

Alex smiled tremulously and nodded.  He reached out and took Mulder’s hand, lacing their fingers and squeezing almost painfully.  “He’s a good friend,” Alex said softly.

Mulder squeezed back, looking at Alex looking at their bed.  “Yeah.  He is,” he agreed.

Alex sniffed again and turned his red-rimmed gaze to Mulder.  There was a hopeful question in his eyes.  Mulder couldn’t help himself.  He leaned in and kissed him, slanting his lips across Alex’s tenderly, mouthing at them and reaching up to stroke his fingers over Alex’s freshly shaven face.

“Let’s go to bed,” Mulder whispered, still kissing, still breathing Alex in.

Alex nodded and let himself be led to the cots.  As Alex was crawling in, Mulder caught his breath.  “Macaroni and cheese!” he exclaimed.  “Hey, do you want it in here?”

Alex crawled beneath the sheet with a heavy sigh.  “God yes, Mulder.”

Alex was able to stay awake long enough to eat down half a bowl of macaroni and cheese and a little milk.

Mulder put the dishes away.  The place was quiet, everyone finally sleeping.   The lull before the storm, Mulder thought.

When he returned to the bedroom, Alex was lying on his left side, hand clutching the side of the bed, eyes closed, lips parted on uneven breaths.  He was not yet asleep.  Mulder sighed quietly, looking at him.  He knew they were going to wage war soon, that things would slide into chaos pretty fast,  but instead of that knowledge infecting this moment, he found he felt…calm.  He blinked lowly, his exhaustion a purely physical thing.

He undressed down to his boxer-briefs.  He regretted, now, having given Alex a T-shirt to wear to bed.  He wanted to feel that body again…each sinew, each hard plane of bone into muscle.

He walked over to the bed, dousing the low lamp and throwing the room into deep shadow.  He heard his own breath, then, as if the light had been a barrier between him and the silence, the last thing sharing the room with him and his partner.

Mulder crawled in behind Alex slowly, slipping under the sheet, he felt, almost illicitly.  It brushed a smile over his lips as he licked them.  He took a breath and then pressed in close behind Alex, his body curving against his lover’s, making Mulder a little breathless with the low-grade arousal it sparked.

Alex tensed at the intimacy, but Mulder wrapped his arm tight around him, pulling him back into a snug fit.  Mulder’s cock surged delightedly into Alex’s lower back.  Mulder shifted and it nudged the swell of Alex’s ass as it grew to erection.

He felt Alex shudder…like a sigh that released with it a little bit of his apprehension at such a foreign act as going to bed with somebody.  Mulder flattened his palm against Alex’s chest and hummed against his neck.

“You smell good,” Mulder said.

He waited for a grunt or further comment from the other man.  But there was nothing.  Mulder lifted his head and looked down at Alex’s face.  He’d fallen asleep.  Just like that.  Mulder leaned down carefully and pressed his lips right behind Alex’s small ear.  His eyes fluttered closed even as his cock demanded to find its way inside its lover’s body somehow.

Mulder laid back down behind Alex and let himself relax gradually.  He lay there for a long time, just feeling, until the sky began to lighten.

……….

He didn’t think he’d fallen asleep, but he seemed to be dreaming now.  He was on his back in a foreign bed and a pleasurable warmth suffused his languid body.  He felt completely at ease…relaxed…like he was floating.  He groaned and scratched his belly with clumsy fingers.

And then his whole focus zeroed in on the sensation between his legs.  Gentle fingers…slipping his cock out of the fly of his boxers.  He groaned again.

Oh good…  It was a good dream.  He smiled without opening his eyes.  The fingers fondled his length surely…so warm.  It almost tickled.  He pressed up into the stroking touch, his asscheeks clenching tightly.  His whole world was his own cock right now.  Good…  His cock felt good.  Happy.  He moaned and spread his legs.  One fell off the side of the bed he was in, encountering something…someone…  Kneeling beside the bed.

“Mmmmm…” he hummed.  The fingers had dipped into his fly, pulling on his balls a little.  He shuddered violently with pleasure.

And then…  Hot…wet…  Someone was licking the very tip of his cock.

“Unnnn…” he moaned, squirming slowly, fists seeking the sheets, pulling, his own leg bending and opening.  “Ffffuuhhhh…” he breathed.

And he realized it was all just a little too good to be a dream.  He kept his eyes closed, realizing who was really touching him, seducing his cock into a soft, wet kiss…another…

Alex.

Mulder groaned, arching.  The hand in his shorts worked his balls, squeezing them together, as the mouth didn’t quite take his cock in…just playing around the tip in a cruel and wonderful tease.

“Ah…” Mulder cried abortively and the tongue laved all around his cockhead.  “Alex…” he finally sighed, letting his lover know:  I know it’s you.  I’m here.  Do this to me.

Alex’s low growl washed up over Mulder’s body and Mulder began to pant with wanting to come.  Just a little more…one little suck might even do it.  He was so painfully turned on now.  Just saying Alex’s name had nearly done him in.

He reached down, with both hands, and took Alex’s face.  He lifted his own head and opened his eyes.

“I’m gonna come in your mouth if you do this,” he gasped.

Alex blinked at him, letting his lips brush over his cockhead in a slow, deliberate caress.  And he nodded.  Just nodded.

“Ahgod,” Mulder groaned.  He pulled Alex’s hair a little, humping himself as gently as possible against that open mouth.  “Alex…” he whined.  “Alex, I’ve never…  You’re the only…”  Suddenly he wanted Alex to know.  To know everything he didn’t let him hear last night.  “Never been with…another man…” he finished, desperate to sink between those pretty lips.  He felt the gasp that left them and groaned.  “Please…” he whispered.  “Alex, please…”

Then Alex growled and Mulder felt the most wonderful liquid sucking heat slide down his cock all the way to the base.

He threw his head back into the pillow, his one hand trembling and gripping at the back of Alex’s head, his other flying up to clutch the pillow, as his cock exploded in the other man’s mouth and he screamed.

Alex sucked him dry as Mulder’s hips continued to pulse up rhythmically on his loud, drawn out whine.  Then Mulder’s hips relaxed down to the bed, his own mouth going slack on a heavy sigh as Alex’s slurped off his cock.

“Jesus…”  Mulder breathed.  “Fuck…”

Alex stood.  Mulder fought the languor his body seemed beautifully mired in and surged up, grabbing Alex by the hips and yanking him forward.  He buried his face in Alex’s crotch, still clothed but covering a massively hard erection.  Mulder spoke against it as he trailed his hands up his lover’s hips and took hold of the waistband of his underwear.

“Take it easy on me, Alex…”  Then he blinked his gaze up to the stormy desire brightening the other man’s dilated eyes.  “I’m a virgin cocksucker,” he whispered.

Alex moaned, cupping Mulder’s jaw tenderly.  Mulder noticed that his lashes were spiked together with moisture as he began tugging the briefs down until they cleared Alex’s straining cock.

Then he dropped his eyes to it, taking it with one hand wrapped firmly around the base, his other hand resting on Alex’s hip.  But as he peered up and tentatively closed his mouth over the crown, he slid his hand back and cupped Alex’s tight ass.  Alex gasped, but Mulder moaned as he closed his eyes, gripping the ass in his hand and beginning to suck hungrily.

He knew he couldn’t do what Alex had done, but he didn’t have time to worry about inadequacy.  He was too busy loving what he was doing.  He ran his hand over Alex’s ass possessively, squeezing, stroking, just exploring even as his mouth worked at Alex’s cock, and what his mouth couldn’t take, he pumped in his fist.

“Mulder…God…”  Alex murmured above him.  Mulder felt the hand that had been holding his jaw lovingly move…slowly and surreptitiously…to the back of his head.  The suggestion forced Mulder’s own arousal higher and his cock began to get hard again just from that veiled threat of a touch.  Mulder didn’t know if Alex knew he was doing it, or that his hips were pulsing slightly into Mulder’s face.  The fact that he wanted to just take Mulder’s mouth, even if he wasn’t conscious of it, and he didn’t do it…was incredibly hot.

Mulder just basked in having Alex at his disposal…at how he tasted, clean and salty and a little sweet, how his ass felt jerking in his hand as he strove for release.  Mulder moaned, moving his other hand to Alex’s ass, too, and trying to take more cock into his mouth.  He squeezed Alex’s ass hard and grunted, asking for more, pleading for what Alex so obviously wanted.

But Alex snarled and pulled Mulder’s head away, slipping out.  “Might hurt you,” he gasped.  “And I’m gonna come.”

“World might end,” Mulder countered.  He blinked up at a panting Alex.  “Give me everything.”

Alex looked at him, teeth gritted against the pain of longing.  Then he swallowed and snarled, wrenching Mulder’s head back and pushing his cock back in between Mulder’s stretching lips.

He fisted Mulder’s hair and pumped his dick into Mulder’s mouth.  Mulder gagged a little, but he breathed through his nose rapidly and got it under control, hands coming up to find that magnificent ass once more.

Alex didn’t fuck him for long, coming fast and hard on a sob of ecstasy.  Some of his cum dribbled out the side of Mulder’s mouth, but Mulder was able to swallow most of it, turning his head and working the cock in his mouth with his tongue until Alex’s hand relaxed in his hair.  Then Alex withdrew his still-mostly-hard cock inch by inch, hissing a little along the way.  He released Mulder’s hair and slid unceremoniously into a heap by the side of the bed, resting his head on Mulder’s thigh as he came down.

“Ohgod,” he groaned.

Mulder panted as well and laid his hand over Alex’s head, petting him.

“Mulder,” Alex groaned.  Then he looked up into Mulder’s eyes and gave him a smile that could have made Mulder fall in love with him if he hadn’t already.  “I am not the first man you’ve gone down on,” Alex proclaimed vehemently.

Mulder nodded, licking his lips clean.  “First man for everything,” he said.

Alex’s brows drew into a frown.  He rose up on his knees and stroked his hand back into Mulder’s hair.  Alex was looking at Mulder’s mouth with intensity.  He shook his head.  And then he kissed Mulder, deep and tender.   When he broke away, he stayed close.

“Why me?” he asked Mulder, throat thick with feeling.

Mulder held Alex’s face in his hands.  “I just got lucky,” he professed.

Alex pulled away enough that he could look at Mulder, and Mulder met the weighty gaze.

“Today’s the day,” Mulder said with a smile that held the solid clarity of sadness.  Then he leaned his forehead on Alex’s.  “I don’t care if we’re being hunted down like animals by the end of the day, Alex.”  He swallowed.  “Tonight…you’re in my arms.  You hear me?”

Alex tilted his head and bit Mulder’s bottom lip.  Then he kissed him so long and slow it was almost excruciating.  His whisper was so soft Mulder almost couldn’t hear him.  “It’s what I’m fighting for.”

They dressed slowly, neither wanting to leave the room for fear of not making it back.

“I need a shower before we do this,” Mulder declared.  “Fucked, sucked…any way you look at it I’m a mess.”  Alex barked a laugh and Mulder shot him a filthy smile.  Then he sobered a little.  “See you out there?”

Alex nodded, pulling up a pair of jeans.

When Mulder emerged from the shower, clean and dressed, hair still damp and hanging down over his forehead in slick locks, Alex was giving orders to three large Russian guys, making sure everyone was ready for the evacuation it sounded like.

Mulder caught Danny’s eye.  “Hey,” he said, smiling softly.

“Hey,” Danny returned, setting down a box and coming over.  “You look refreshed.”

Mulder smirked.  “And I didn’t sleep a wink.”

Danny smiled broadly.  “Good.  You ready for this?” he said then, looking around at the hubbub and sighing.

“Ready enough,” Mulder replied.  “Alex is going to address the group.  Then we’re on.”

Frohike came up to him then.  “Buenos dias, Senorita.”

Girlie jokes, thought Mulder, great.  But he smiled and punched his friend on the arm.  “You guys ready for the hack of a lifetime?”

Frohike snorted loudly.  “Langly’s foaming at the mouth and chewing on the CPU,” he answered.  “I’m afraid we may have to tranq him.”

Mulder patted his friend’s shoulder.  “Good.  Hang tight, it’s almost time.”  Then he nodded to Danny and started to make his way over to Alex who was deep in conversation, in Russian, with one of the soldiers.

Vladi grabbed Mulder’s arm on the way over.  “Mr. Fox!’ he exclaimed.  “Mr. Fox!  Do you think we go to Missouri tonight?  I have never been to old west.”

Mulder looked down at the beautiful boy.  Danny, you dog, he couldn’t help but think to himself.  “Probably,” he told the excited kid.

“And we live in cave?” Vladi persisted.

“For a little while,” Mulder answered.

“Can I fly in jet with you and Comrade Krycek?”

“You don’t want to ride in the truck with Danny?” Mulder asked.

“Yes,” Vladi answered, frowning.  “I do not wish to leave him.  Would you drive with us?”

“I’ll talk to Mr. Krycek and see what we can work out, okay?” he answered smiling.  “Go help Danny with that box, huh?  He looks like he needs you.”

Vladi jumped with a gasp and scampered away to find his beloved.  Mulder sighed and turned back to Alex who seemed to be concluding his business with the other man.

Mulder walked over and easily stroked his hand up into Alex’s hair, waiting for him to finish his sentence.  But his lover faltered, starting a little and giving Mulder a confused look before turning back slowly and continuing.

Mulder had no idea what he was saying, any words he might have learned being hammered out so fast now that Mulder didn’t have a chance in hell of catching them.  So he just watched Alex, trailing his hand down his neck and waiting patiently.

Finally Alex nodded to the soldier who nodded back seriously and turned on his heel to carry out his orders.  Alex turned to Mulder and blinked at him.  “Mulder,” he murmured.  “They’re…  You’re…”  He looked around.  “They can see us.”

Mulder smirked.  “Really,”  he replied as if fascinated by this new knowledge.

Alex frowned a little and Mulder licked his lips.

“You immodest slut,” Alex said, shaking his head.

Mulder slipped his hand down to Alex’s ass and let it rest there.  “Fuck ‘em if they can’t take it,” he said.

Alex had to try extraordinarily hard not to smile at that one, Mulder could tell.

Mulder patted his partner on the ass once, then retracted his hand and asked, “Want me to go with you over there?”

“Don’t you have to help the guys with tweaking the signal?” Alex returned.

Mulder shook his head.  “Langly’s guarding the computer desk like a rabid terrier.  I think I’d be more useful somewhere else.”

Alex nodded, swallowing.  “Let’s go.”

………

Mulder was proud of how his partner addressed his army.  Even if he was still a bit scary.  They responded to him well and were relieved to see him back amongst them, even not knowing the danger he’d been in that had kept him away.

Alex gave the talk over to Mulder after a bit and Mulder smiled at him first, getting a few rapid blinks in response.  Mulder found himself getting emotional as he talked to these men and women who believed in them and in this cause…this fight.  He realized, mid-speech, that he’d never been in a room full of people who believed in him before.  He had to take a minute to force the tears back down his throat, and he was surprised to feel Alex’s hand at his back while he gathered himself back together.  The troops waited with looks of pride and passion.  They were his as much as they were Alex’s.  And they were a young army.  More theirs than they’d ever been the Brit’s.

They were ready.  And Mulder told them so.

They were dismissed to continue loading stores of the vaccine into trucks, ready to take action in case of an early release of the virus or effect crowd control if there was a pre-retaliation panic or both.

Mulder and Alex were on their way back to the main facility, surrounded by hulking Russians.

“Do we have our plants in place?” Alex asked Mulder.

“Yeah, we’ve got guys in almost all the police precincts and in the fire departments and emergency rooms.  We’ll know right away if there’s a mass panic.”

It was something they’d planned on and that Mulder had had to install in Alex’s absence.  Though he’d thought about scrapping the whole business at the time.  Now he was glad he hadn’t.

They returned to find the boys huddled around the computer.  All eyes were on the two men as they walked through the door, though.

“I’m almost in,” Langly announced.  “Five more minutes on this firewall.”

Mulder looked at Alex and they went over to stand behind the Gunmen.  Danny turned on the TV by the couch and then began switching on the other four they’d set up, adjusting each to one of the five main channels.

The five minutes passed slowly with Mulder sweating it the whole way.

“Got it,” Langly said finally.  Everybody seemed to hold their breath.  “EAS is open…Digital feed on-line…I’m feeding it the signal now.”

Mulder squinted at the screen until their TVs went black.

“Hey!” Danny yelled from the couch.

Mulder reached out and grabbed Alex’s wrist, watching wide-eyed as all the TVs simultaneously fired up the same image.  First the two-toned EAS interruption and then…The Message began and there were cheers around the room.

Mulder turned back to Langly.  “You bouncing the signal?”

“Through fifteen coded lines,” Langly boasted.  “They’d have to be gods to trace it in less than twenty-four hours.”

Mulder bit his lip and nodded.  “But they can disrupt the transmission without tracking it, right?”

“Yeah, but it’ll even take a little while to do that,” Langly assured him.  “I embedded the signal with a virus that blocks tampering without the correct clearance code.  They have to hack my kung fu to get their precious programming back on-line.  That or shut down completely, which they’ll probably do. But not until they bash their heads on my signal for a bit first.”  He looked at Mulder.  “We’re like stink on shit.”

Mulder smirked at him, lifting his gaze to watch The Message loop and transmit again.  He released his grip on Alex’s wrist to slide his hand down and grasp the other man’s in a warm embrace.  They looked at one another, listening to the transmission…the sound like the first shot ringing through Mulder’s ears.

………..

“GO!  GO!!”

The sky was dark with bees and spaceships. And it was getting darker.

It had happened so fast.  So fucking fast.

And there’d been no mass hysteria after the message was sent.  Just people calling their cable companies demanding that Days of Our Lives be put back on.

Now this.

They were being raided.  One of their sources had called the tip in at six that morning and they’d hauled ass to get their people loaded up and on the road.

Now Mulder was yelling into his walkie talkie at Alex who had stayed behind to rig the facility with explosives.  Mulder had stayed as well, sending Danny and the others off in the trucks, headed for Missouri.

Mulder was in the Expedition, waiting.  Alex had had to be close enough to set the charge.  He’d let it rip once the operatives had stormed it, but now he was on the run from the second wave.

“Run your ass off, goddamnit!”  Mulder yelled, knowing Alex couldn’t answer.  Finally he came into sight in the rearview mirror.  Mulder threw the car into reverse, barreling backward and watching as Alex turned, took aim, and fired five rounds, then came back to running full tilt toward their SUV which Mulder swerved to a screeching stop about twenty feet from his fast-running partner, around twelve from the opposition giving chase.

Mulder reached across and threw open the door.

“COME ON!” he yelled, and Alex threw himself into the truck a split second before Mulder threw it into drive and spit gravel as he sped away, shots firing behind them as he careened down the drive.

Alex was breathing hard.  Mulder gripped the wheel with two hands as Alex turned and watched the Consortium assassins getting farther and farther away.

As Alex turned back around, reloading his gun with one-handed efficiency, Mulder looked back in the mirror to see the last ballooning fire ball take to the sky, looking like it might lick the bottom of the giant ship that was hovering over D.C. malevolently, blocking the sun.

Mulder swallowed thickly, trying to watch the road for the turn and for any new threat, but also unable to quite look away from the destruction behind them for good.  It wasn’t just headquarters, and it wasn’t just a place they’d holed up for a while.

It had been their home.  His first real home.  He didn’t count growing up.  That had felt more like a mental ward at times with Mulder as the lone patient.  His mother medicating him with platitudes and chores, his father standing guard like Nurse Ratchet, ready to strap him down with blame.  And his apartment…  He’d thought he was happy.  When really he’d never felt so alone and in such darkness.

He’d loved Alex in this place.  And now it was burning brightly on the horizon like a fake sunset.

Mulder sighed heavily and felt Alex turn a little, hesitating, then reach across the space and place his hand on Mulder’s shoulder.

“It began there,” he husked.  “But that’s not where it ends, Fox.”

Mulder inhaled, glancing sideways at him and letting his breath out through pursed lips.  He nodded, gripping the wheel tighter and pushing the pedal down.  They were alone, and Alex was calling him Fox.  Letting him know…home was where they were together.

Mulder sighed as Alex’s hand left his arm.

“Don’t go to the air strip,” Alex told him calmly.  Under his words, though, was the sound, the very frequency, of his honed instinct.  He looked at Mulder again.  “It’s not safe.”

“So we’re…what?  Driving?” Mulder asked, looking behind them again and seeing no trace of their hit squad.  Only smoke now and bees and an unnatural shadow blanching the trees colorless.

“Maybe we can catch up with the others,” Alex stated with a little pensive frown.  But Mulder knew Alex had not been fond of the idea of leaving them, taking a jet when they’d be driving all that way.

Mulder smiled, though there was an ache under his ribs.  Something primal.  Something that couldn’t help but recognize the shift.  Something in him that couldn’t ignore the shadow looming over their heads and knew nothing would ever be the same.  Not ever again.

He nodded, though, blinking the tears away, tears of mourning he couldn’t afford to shed.  Then he bit his lip and stepped on the gas.


                                                                    XXXXX


Three months later…


Mulder walked quickly to the entrance as the huge metal doors split apart like the Red Sea for Moses, and Alex and the others returned.

“Did we get them?” he asked right away.  “Shit, you’re a mess,” was close on the heels of that.

Alex was covered in dirt and what looked like motor oil.  It scared Mulder to see it for only a split second.  He knew they were all vaccinated.  Alex wasn’t and never would be one of the ones to fall.  It was just oil…grease…nothing more.

Still, Mulder reached out and palmed his dirty face, searching it.

And if Alex’s darkly smug smile hadn’t given him his answer, the sound of helicopters approaching from the distance would have.

Not just a few helicopters either.  A lot of helicopters.  Loud and authoritative, like thunder.

Mulder smiled and slapped Alex lightly on the cheek, passing him to run out into the clearing to watch as they flew over, one by one dropping down out of the sky to land behind the trees.

“How many?” Mulder asked, head tilted up, as Alex came up beside him.

“Twenty-one,” his partner answered.

Mulder turned to him with a gasp.  “Holy shit, Alex!”  He stared at the grimy face of his lover for a moment and then asked, “How the fuck did you manage that?”

Alex watched as the choppers came in like huge, dark homing birds, and the trucks of soldiers pulled into the rock-face hanger to their right.  “Will power,” he smirked.

Mulder eyed him narrowly.

“Fire power,” Alex amended, turning once more toward the cave entrance.  “C’mon,” he said.  “I’m starving.”

“Any casualties?” Mulder asked, walking briskly beside Alex, followed by their ever-present brute force of bodyguards.

“Richardson got hit in the leg.  And we’ve got about five that we’re treating for minor burns…too close to the first blast.  But overall, not like it could have been.”

Not like two months ago, Mulder added for him quietly.  Not like Jackson.  He swallowed back the memory, still vivid, of all the bodies they’d brought home in bags.  Including the Gunmen.  They’d not known how under-prepared they were to take down that base.  It had nearly been a massacre.

It had been a hard hit in more ways than one.  Mulder had lost dear friends, brave enough to go in on the first offensive strike the resistance had initiated.  They’d also just lost numbers.  They’d taken on a wealth of new recruits out of the people fleeing their cities and homes and striking out on their own.  But the operation was still very new at that point and then their man on the base had turned double agent, informing on their attack so that the base had been ready and waiting when they’d arrived.

They’d lost a good deal of their frontline before they could even gather themselves together enough to pull back.  Mulder had scarcely made it back alive himself, taking with him a gash down his chest that would leave its deep, jagged scar forever.

Things were different now.  There was an intricate underground railroad web from which they recruited for their resistance that brought new people in daily.  Their numbers increased and they had a couple of successful hits on other military bases, disabling their communication with the alien ships, taking out whole research buildings and stealing much needed equipment, trucks, and now…

Helicopters.

Their once small group of soldiers had turned into a fighting force of over one hundred thousand, sixty thousand of those all underground here in Missouri.  They were bigger, they were better equipped…  And they were changed.  No one would forget Jackson Air Force Base.  No one would forget how easy it would be to be right back there again.

“I need a shower,” Alex growled on their way down the rock-hewn tunnel toward the elevators.  “Can you come with me?” he asked a little softer, after all this time sounding a little shy.  They’d long since stopped caring about the four, huge, ubiquitous bodyguards that could constantly hear their private conversations when they weren’t in their own personal quarters.  So the shyness was with Mulder, not their entourage.

“I promised Vladi I’d show him the choppers,” Mulder told him with an apologetic look.

“Can’t that wait?”  Alex asked, sounding a little put-out.

“He’s really excited.  He really wanted to go on this mission,” Mulder told him.

“He knows why we needed him here,” Alex grumped.

“Yeah, but that’s all the more reason to let him be the first to see.”

“Isn’t that Danny’s job?” Alex asked, slanting a glance Mulder’s way.

“Danny’s vaccinating about sixty new ones today, I don’t think he can stop to breathe much less take Vladi on a chopper tour,” Mulder replied.

“If he’d fucking delegate…”  Alex snarled under his breath.

Mulder fought a smirk.  He’d be petulant now.  Mulder happened to like petulant Alex.  He shot a discreet gaze back at their hulking groupies.  When they stopped at the elevators, Mulder turned to them.

“Thank you, Comrades.  Please take the next car,” he said simply with a polite nod.

“But sir…” the biggest one, Dmitri, objected mildly.

“That will be all,” Mulder announced as the doors slid open.  “You can go take a break and then wait at the commissary until we arrive,” he ended, pulling Alex into the elevator by his sleeve.  He nodded again with a bright smile at Dmitri’s frown as the doors closed between them.

“What are you…?” Alex began.

Mulder dug quickly in Alex’s jacket pocket and withdrew a small remote.  He aimed it at the console and pressed the button he knew would halt video surveillance in their car.  Then he put it back in Alex’s pocket and shoved him back against the wall, driving a grunt from the other man.

The car began to descend.  And Mulder unzipped Alex’s dirty jeans, sliding to the floor in front of him.

“Christ…”  Alex got out before Mulder opened his mouth over the swelling flesh and took him to the back of his throat.

“Mmmmm…”  Mulder moaned, licking and sucking and slurping as he began blowing Alex, holding his hips and moving his head in and out from the other man’s body.

“Ahhh…”  Alex panted.  “Fox, shit…”

Alex’s head banged back against the chrome paneling as a polite female voice announced, “Sub-level one….sub-level two…”

“Muh…Muh…  Shit…” Alex gasped.

Mulder did him fast, sucking hard, working his tongue against the warm, throbbing length.

“Sub-level five….sub-level six…”

“Oh God!”  Alex cried one floor away from their stop and came violently into Mulder’s mouth.  “God!  God!  God!  Ohgooooooooooood!” he sobbed.

Then Mulder sucked off, panting and licking his lips, pushing his partner’s cock back into his jeans and zipping them before standing just in time for the doors to open on sub-level seven.

They were greeted right away by a tall, Scandinavian blonde with muscles for days.  “Oh…  We lost the feed on your car, are you all right?”

Mulder wiped at the corner of his mouth.  “Peachy,” he replied with a crooked smile, glancing back at Alex who was still quite out of breath, but trying to cover.  “What’s up, Lars?”

Alex stepped up beside him and they followed Lars into the long room that served as their Great Hall.  A place where the troops, the medics, the technicians, and everyone in between could gather and enjoy a sense of community and eat like pigs.

“Well, there’s the dinner in three nights.  Your suits are pressed and down in your quarters…”

Alex interrupted him.  “What about the three bodies brought in yesterday?”

“All within the 72 hour cut off, Danny says.  They’re critical for the next day as far as survival, but they won’t gestate.”  Lars threw back a withering look.  “But if Danny doesn’t see one of you by the end of the day I think he’s going to go ballistic.”

Mulder shot Alex a look.  It was his turn to deal with their stressed-out friend.

“Other than that, it’s status quo,” Lars told them.

Alex sighed.

“Is Vladi still in the vault?” Mulder asked.

They’d walked the length of the room and gone through a door on the other side, opening out into a large hallway, bustling with people.

“Yes, and he’s expecting Mr. Fox promptly,” Lars commented with a smirk.

It was Alex’s turn to shoot Mulder a look.  It said, Better you than me.  Mulder knew the kid’s energy was often too much for Alex to be around.  Mulder also knew Vladi would kill for Alex to give him just a few minutes’ worth of attention.  Alex was most definitely Vladi’s hero.  Mulder had tried to get Alex to understand that, but the other man would just get cranky and mumble something about there being no one true hero or how everyone had their place.  It varied slightly depending on his mood already, but it was always a pat response.  Mulder would smile gently, remembering how Danny had told him that Alex had called Mulder a hero.  He’d shrug and let it go until the next time it came up.

“You coming with?”  Mulder asked.  “I thought you were gonna shower.”

Alex stopped.  “Lars, I’ll see you at the meeting tomorrow and we’ll go over the problem with the air ducts,” he said.  Lars nodded and turned to walk away.

Alex turned his attention to Mulder.  Mulder gave him a raise of his eyebrows.  Alex said, “I thought I’d go see Danny first.  He wants to see me so bad, he can smell me, too.”

Mulder wrapped his arms around Alex’s neck and Alex rested his hands on Mulder’s waist.  Mulder thrilled to the feel of the fingers on both hands tightening possessively.  He had to admit that Alex’s new prosthetic was working out very nicely.

“Will I see you before dinner?” Mulder asked.

“Probably not,” answered Alex.  “Sorry.”

People passed them, and their embrace didn’t garner much attention other than a few respectfully short glances.

“Whataya makin’?” Mulder said.

“Spinach florentine with porchine mushrooms.”

“Ooooh,” Mulder purred.  “Is there a dessert?”

Alex cocked an eyebrow at him.  “That’s not enough for you?”

“Don’t I get something for my elevator efforts?” Mulder asked, enjoying how Alex’s eyes darkened at the mention.  “Hummer under the table?” Mulder suggested.

Alex’s eyes darted to either side, their conversation entering a zone he was no longer comfortable with in public.  Mulder thought it was funny.  One of his pet projects was goading Alex sexually in public places.  It wasn’t like Alex’s reputation would suffer.  People were pretty much at least a little scared of him.  As Mulder saw it, them being openly affectionate with each other made people feel like they were more human and the result was that their subordinates cared about them more.  Danny had re-enforced this idea as well, and Alex had finally come to be able to touch Mulder in front of the general public.  Mulder, of course, had always touched Alex whether or not the other man welcomed it

Of course, the goading was different.  Mulder really pushed it with his innuendo and dirty talk.  He knew it.  But it was just too fun.

“It’s the apocalypse,” Mulder tried now, one of his standard goads.  “Come on, do me in front of the bodyguards.  They’re gagging for it.”  (To Mulder’s knowledge, their bodyguards were all extremely, rigorously heterosexual.)

Alex frowned.

“I’ll suck your toes,” Mulder tried.

A glimmer in Alex’s eye.

“Pee on me,” Mulder continued with a lascivious wink.

Alex’s lips were trying to smile though his eyes were maintaining a frown.  Mulder felt Alex’s prosthetic fingers pinch his ass quite hard.  He smiled at the mild abuse and hummed low in his throat.  Alex rolled his eyes and started to walk away.

“Pussy,” Mulder called.

“Didn’t say I wouldn’t do it,” Alex retorted blandly, still walking away.

Mulder’s laughter echoed off the walls and, satisfied, he turned in the other direction to go find Vladi.

The kid was overjoyed to see all those helicopters up close.  He confessed to Mulder that he’d always wanted to be a helicopter pilot.  Except he said flyer.  And he pronounced it helichopter.

Mulder took him up to the surface and led him around the landing pads the kid had helped to build himself.

They’d discovered quite by accident that the boy was a genius mechanic.  One of the trucks had broken down on the way to Missouri and everyone’s efforts to get it driving again had failed.  Then Vladi jumped out of his own truck, came and peered under the hood, and declared, “Thees hose es loose and the gadget at the back rear of engine es banging on hood.”

He knew the names for nothing, but he could fix any damned thing that went wrong ever, and sometimes without the right parts.  Mulder had deemed him Mini-MacGyver once and had gotten a very serious and puzzled blinking look from the boy.

From that trip on, he was their master mechanic.

And he’d been working for about two weeks on a piece of equipment they’d stolen outside a military base in West Virginia.

He filled Mulder in as they came back from viewing the choppers.

“Es like…ehm…black hose for TV.”

“Cable?”

“Yes, cable.  But it attach onto something we do not have of possession…  And it is not made of something…”  He looked frustrated.  “I cannot find match.  Danny looks up things in very big English books on materials, but…”  He shrugged.  “We find nothing.”

Mulder gave him a little smile and ruffled his hair.  Ruffling his hair was quite addictive.  Everybody did it.

“You’ll find it.  I’m not worried,” Mulder told him.

Vladi smiled then and they made their way back inside the compound, trailed by Mulder’s entourage which had somehow caught up with him.

“Thanks, Dmitri,” Mulder said around a forced smile as his guard held the elevator door for him.

He took it all the way down to sub-level ten.  Their quarters were the only thing on that level, buried deep in the earth and insulated with six-inch steel walls within the rock to keep them safe in case of attack.  Neither of them liked the separation from the others, but they acknowledged its necessity.

Dmitri and Jones took their positions outside the quiet abode as Mulder gave them a thankful smile and nod then ducked inside.

As Alex had predicted, he wasn’t back at their quarters when Mulder returned, though dinner was in the oven with a note to Mulder to turn it up to 350 when he got home.  ‘And turn the big dial to Bake,’ it continued.  Mulder scoffed at it aloud to no one, but then turned and saw the single red rose lain atop the dining room table and pretty much melted.  He picked it up and smelled it, then put it in a vase with water and put it back in the center of the table.

His big, intimidating romantic.

In the three months they’d been lovers, Mulder had gradually come to realize that Alex Krycek had been in love with him for some time.  It was nothing specific the other man said.  It was just based on an amalgamation of his actions in that time.  And the knowledge humbled Mulder considerably.

No one had ever loved him like this man did.

Mulder turned the oven on as instructed, then took a shower and shaved, and by the time he came out of the steamy room, Alex was home.

They shared Alex’s spectacular dinner then sprawled out on the couch together, full and bloated.

“You’re gonna kill me with food,” Mulder insisted.

They sat in silence, Mulder too full to speak for some time.  Then Alex said, “Danny’s really in a fix.”

Mulder took a breath and steeled his resolve for the conversation he knew would follow that remark.

“He’s got plenty of nurses and techs and even people in internal medicine, but no one as qualified to…”

“Alex,” Mulder interrupted.  “I know.”  He swallowed.  “I emailed her.  There’s nothing else I can really do at this point except listen to Danny bitch and try not to deck him.”

Alex smirked.  “I might like to see that, though.”  He sobered when Mulder didn’t seem amused.  “I know you’ve done your part,” he rumbled softly.  He reached out and took Mulder’s hand in his.  “It’s not that.  It’s not even that I blame her for holding a grudge against me.”

Mulder looked at their entwined fingers and sighed.  “Maybe I do,” he replied.

It was Alex’s turn to sigh.  “I think you need to make up with her, Fox.  Before…”  He cut himself off, but Mulder closed his eyes and nodded.

“I understand,” he told the other man.  Then he whispered, “I know.”

Alex pulled him into a hug and they stayed like that for a long while.

Around midnight, Alex took him to bed and they made love slowly.  No toe sucking or golden showers, though Mulder had learned that Alex was not averse to Mulder’s desire for such kink on occasion.

But tonight…

Alex laid him down and licked Mulder from head to foot, bathing him with a warm, patient tongue that kept Mulder nearly begging for more or less or…just a little longer right there.

Then Alex wordlessly turned them both over so that he was on bottom.  He lifted his legs and wrapped them around Mulder’s waist then pulled Mulder’s head down and whispered in his ear, “Put it inside me.”  His lashes had tickled Mulder’s temple.  “Fuck me, Mulder.”

He didn’t often like to be topped, so Mulder sighed shiveringly at the request, his cock hard and already nudging at Alex's tight hole.

Mulder lubed himself with a trembling hand and guided his erection into Alex’s ass with aching tenderness.  Alex’s legs held him tight as Mulder rode his lover’s body to release.  Alex didn’t usually come just from being fucked, and he didn’t tonight, so Mulder rolled off of him once he finished coming and laid by his side as he stroked Alex’s cock in his coaxing fist until he exploded his climax over his own belly and Mulder’s knuckles.

They cleaned off and Alex removed his prosthetic.  They fell asleep not long after and slept soundly in and out of each other’s arms until morning.

…………

“Washington Merry-Go-Round.”

“What?” asked Alex, stroking his hand over Mulder’s back.

Mulder’s head shifted on Alex’s chest, and he sighed.  Their sun-simulating lamp had brightened a little with the coming dawn.

“1952.  Two UFOs were detected on radar near the White House.  Jets were sent from Delaware to intercept, but the UFOs disappeared.”   Mulder’s hand drifted over Alex’s chest, stilling above his left nipple.  He watched his fingers rise and fall.  “The jets were ordered back to the ground, but as soon as they landed, the UFOs showed back up on radar.”

Alex chuckled.  “Sneaky.”

Mulder smiled and moved his hand in lazy circles on Alex’s chest, nearing his left armpit on each pass.

“You’re tickling me,” Alex told him.

“You’re not laughing.”

“I’m a finely tuned machine,” Alex answered.  “My responses are…”

Mulder dropped his fingers to Alex’s ribs, along his left side and went to town.  Alex erupted in insane giggles, jerking beneath him.  Mulder stopped, smiling in relaxed triumph.

“Bitch,” Alex wheezed.

Mulder sighed, “Anyway…  The jets went out a second time.”

“And what happened?” Alex asked when Mulder paused to listen to the rapid pounding of Alex’s heart.

“One pilot reported seeing blue and white lights in the sky.  He said they were everywhere.  That they surrounded him.”

“Did he fire?”

“No,” Mulder replied.  “Nobody knew what to tell him to do.  Pretty soon the UFOs just disappeared.  It made really big news.  Roswell hadn’t been made public yet, so it was one of the first truly unexplained and well publicized phenomena.”  He took a breath.  “I used to wish I’d been alive then.  I wanted to see something like that so badly.”

Alex’s chest moved him up and down.  They were still for a long time before anybody spoke.

“My father probably saw it,” Mulder said.  He felt the hitch in Alex’s previously steady breathing.  He soothed his hand over his lover’s chest, the pain in his own deepening.  Mulder thought about all the blame and guilt and violence of the past and his throat ached with it.  He took a moment to recover, their lamp blooming the room gold with new light.  “Everything led to this,” he told Alex.  “This moment.  I was the one who saw them this time.  And we’re the ones doing something about it.”

Their phone rang, the pleasant trill quiet and uninvasive.  Alex reached out to the nightstand and put it on speaker.  “Yes?”

“Good morning, sir.  Will you and Mr. Mulder be having breakfast with the troops today, sir?”

Alex looked down at Mulder, ducking his chin and Mulder glanced up.  “No, Marguerite,” Alex said, still looking at him.  Mulder noticed his eyes were dark and wet.  “Not today.  Thank you.”

“Sir,” she answered shortly and Alex hung up.

Mulder laid his head back down.  Alex’s arm didn’t come back around him.

“Put your hand back,” Mulder told him plainly.  It was funny what the possible end of human life on earth could push you to do.

Alex’s hand alighted cautiously once again on Mulder’s back.  Alex moved a little under him, still wary, like Mulder would explode if jostled.  His stump waved for a minute and Mulder watched it, as he often did, now trying to find purchase to help the rest of the body resituate.  In frustration, it relaxed once more, dropping down by Alex’s side.

“You know something,” Mulder said.  “You never told me what your tattoo means.”  He reached out and brushed along Alex’s shoulder above the scarring.

His partner sighed.  “I forgot.”

“Yeah, right,” Mulder scoffed.  “Come on,”  he prodded, softly.  Then the kicker: “Please?”

Alex sighed heavily.  His hand ran up Mulder’s back and embedded in his hair.  “All right, you insufferable prick,” he breathed.  “I saw it on the wall of a place in Times Square.”  He told his story slowly, each sentence seeming to cost him something.  Mulder waited patiently.  “I was…just walking,” he said.  “But I had to go in there.  I saw it almost right away,” He glanced at his arm for a moment.  “I looked at it for about fifteen minutes straight.  Guy probably thought I was shot up with a shitload of good heroin or something.  I just couldn’t take my eyes off of it.”  He swallowed.  “I loved it.  The strong color…the shape of the flower and the pitch black of the wire…  It all seemed really…alive.”

Mulder nodded and Alex went on.

“The rose…  It was cut…and bleeding…but it wasn’t…  It wasn’t dead.”

Mulder took a deep breath.  As he blinked, his lashes brushed Alex’s hot skin.  He moved his hand, palming over Alex’s heart and then traveling up the hard pec, the delicate collar bone and strong neck.  He listened to the control in Alex’s breathing as he stroked over his corded shoulder, then down…caressing the tattooed stump of his arm. He detailed each severe barb, each deep-running scar, the rose itself, shifting so he could watch his fingers’ progress.

He salved the bud’s leaking wounds.  He traversed what was left of his lover’s arm, following the gorging tributaries of torn and healed flesh…the little forever drops of blood.

He could feel his own cock rising up against Alex’s thigh as he touched.  Alex lay still for it, his story ended openly.

“Thank you for telling me,” Mulder whispered.

Alex tightened his hand in Mulder’s hair and dropped his lips down into it as well.  That was his answer.  Mulder was welcome.  And he was the only one.

“Do you wanna do something about that?”  Alex asked, rubbing his leg leisurely against Mulder’s excited cock.

Mulder lifted his head and looked up at him.  “Always,” he leered.

Alex smiled.  “Get me hard with your mouth,” he said.

Mulder did, scooting down in the bed, under the sheet, then suckling to the sounds of Alex’s changing breathing.  Before he was ready to quit, Alex grabbed him and hauled him back up.  Then he turned them so that they were facing each other on their sides.  Alex took Mulder’s hip and moved his own pelvis in so that their cocks would press tightly together.  He started to move against Mulder and Mulder fluttered his eyes closed on a delicious moan.  He, too, began to move.

Mulder opened his eyes again as they rocked together, neither speaking or needing to.  He rested his forehead against Alex’s, running his hands up the other man’s back.  Their legs entwined and Alex gripped and released Mulder’s hip over and over in time to his sensuous thrusts.   They exchanged moans…grunts…  And when Mulder got close, he dropped his hands to Alex’s ass, squeezing.  He bit his lip, closed his eyes, and shot between their slowly writhing bodies.

“Unn….Aleh…unnnnn…” he whined.

Alex stroked a strong hand up his body, over his stomach, along his side, up to cup his face.  He leaned in and kissed Mulder.  His tongue pushed in far, a languid fucking of Mulder’s pliant mouth, and Alex came, moving in the crux of Mulder’s thighs.

Mulder took his coffee into the shower while Alex cooked.  They both knew the importance of eating with the troops, especially when they had so many new people.  But it was getting harder to share their time like that.  They didn’t talk about it, but Mulder knew they both felt the need to spend as much time alone with one another as they could.

They were halfway through their intimate breakfast of croissants, eggs, and fruit when the phone rang again.  Alex wiped his mouth and got up to put it on speaker phone like he always did in consideration of Mulder.

“Sir!  Sir!” the excited voice called.  “We…” it panted.  “We found…something.”

……….

They sat in the conference room with all of the heads of the different areas of expertise in attendance.  Danny was there as the medical consultant, Vladi as engineering, and Lars as The Guy Who Must Know Everything as well as half a dozen other men and women.

“Where?” Mulder asked, addressing the only lower-ranking individual in the room, a small, wiry woman by the name of Darci Swenson.

She took a breath, her eyes darting from Mulder to Alex nervously.  “Tennessee, sir,” she answered.  “Northwest.”

Mulder and Alex exchanged a look.  Fucking Tennessee again.

She continued.  “We were investigating the nearby caves to see if we could find more of the civilian holdouts we’d discovered not far from here.  And that’s when it happened.  Parker…he…  I had called him to come see this off-shoot of the cavern we were in.”  She shook her head.  “He didn’t answer, so I went to check on him.  He was…he was…held aloft by a…by a…an energy field of some kind.”

Mulder slanted a quick look sideways at Alex who was frowning in thought.  The woman continued.

“It seemed to be…shaking him…very quickly just…shaking him.  And before I could try to extricate him from the field, it just…threw him backward.  He hit the wall of the cave and was unconscious for about a minute.”

“Did you experience this energy field yourself at any point?”  Lars asked.

She shook her head.  “I thought about throwing something into it…a rock…  But…”  she looked up at the group sheepishly.  “After what it did to Parker…  I thought it would be best to just call Mr. Krycek and report back without risking further interaction with it.”

Mulder nodded, pulling a little on his bottom lip.  He was craving sunflower seeds like a son of a bitch.

“Is Parker badly hurt?”  Alex asked.

Danny was the one to answer.  “He seems fine.  He’s in sick bay with a bad headache and no recollection of being in the cave, much less any kind of energy field.”

“Did you notice anything else strange in the cave, Darci?” Mulder asked.  “Feel a sudden temperature shift?  Get dizzy?”  He leaned forward.  “Did you experience any missing time at all?”

She shook her head.  “No.  I’m sorry.  I was fine.  It was just like any other cave until then.”

Mulder nodded.  “I want to talk to Parker,” he told Alex.

Alex looked at him and then to Lars.  “Start assembling a team,” he said.  “I want to go back there this evening.  I want Burke and Caskel on this.  Danny…Vladi…I want you there, too.  Danny, can you spare yourself?”  As he spoke, he’d casually dipped his hand into his suit pocket, bringing it back out to deposit a handful of sunflower seeds into Mulder’s hand which he nudged to open first.

Danny nodded.  “I want to be there in case this thing throws anybody else around.  Sandy can handle the vaccinations.  We’re behind anyway.  One more day won’t kill us.”

This got a rather stony look from Alex which, in turn, put everybody else into a silent, tactical mode.  Mulder thought of it as the Nobody Say Nuthin’ defense.  Alex didn’t like the word kill.  Or die for that matter.  Mulder thought it might be his Russian heritage…superstitious mother or something.  Alex preferred to use phrases like ‘go the way of the dinosaur’ to get his point across.  Nobody talked about death less, really.  Mulder respected the hell out of it.  Throwing around fatalistic rhetoric wasn’t great on company morale and Alex knew it.  He was also very forthright and honest with his people, even so.  It was a delicate balance and one that Mulder felt Alex strode with confidence.

“Sorry,” Danny concluded, chagrined.

Alex took a breath and nodded once in acknowledgement.  “Get the team ready by four,” he said.  “Mulder, let me know what you get from Parker.  Lars, get me a map of all the caves in this and the neighboring states, Tennessee, Arkansas, Kentucky…  Everybody’s dismissed.  I’ll call a meeting before the team goes out.”  He stood up.

“Thank you, Ms. Swensen,” Mulder added.

Alex frowned and turned to her, nodding once awkwardly and then giving Mulder a kind of…cranky, grateful look.  Mulder grinned, raising a seed in a toast and popping it into his mouth.  Alex’s frown softened.

They parted ways, Lars a little manic about having both map and team assembling duties, Vladi looking terribly excited to be included in the mission, Danny and Mulder on their way to sick bay and Alex, alone and intense, slipping out through the back door.

……..

They took a truck with twelve people not including Mulder.  Alex stayed behind, realizing his partner’s excitement over seeing the phenomenon first hand.  He’d kissed Mulder long and hard, though, in their quarters as had become their custom when one or the other would venture out on a mission.

“Don’t get covered in shit,” Alex said, as the one who stayed would.

It was something they could say in front of the others that conveyed the message without them making mad, passionate love in the cave mouth, declaring boundless adoration for each other with every panting breath.

They’d taken to saying it in private also.  It said so much…everything important.

Danny drove the truck, Mitch Caskel, their gun muscle riding shotgun.   Mulder sat in back with the others.  He sat next to Vladi.  The kid was ecstatic.  But even so, he maintained a professionalism that would have impressed even Comrade Krycek.  But Mulder, knowing the boy well after three months time, could see the high flush on his youthful cheeks and he noticed the fine sheen of sweat under the grown-out black shock of hair over his forehead.  He was starting to resemble his older lover a little with that style.  Mulder wondered if Danny was growing Vladi’s hair out so he could grab it and yank his head back when he was doing him roughly from behind.

Mulder turned his gaze from the kid on that thought, clearing his throat and perusing the group.

Just a recon mission, Mulder told himself.  But inside…deep in his gut and at the back of his head, his intuition was going haywire.  He knew, in a way he could explain to no one except Alex, that there was something big out here.

“Do you think forcefield ees alien technology?” Vladi now asked him.

Mulder turned his head again and looked down at the boy.  “Is that what you think?” Mulder asked.

“Maybe,” Vladi shrugged.  “Maybe ees like…cloaking device.”

Mulder laughed a little, shortly.  “When do you turn twenty-one, kid?” he asked.

“Next month!” Vladi exclaimed with a bright smile.  “Danny says he take me to San Francisco.  To gay bar.  I cannot wait to dance to voice of American divas.”

Mulder laughed.  “Well…when we get back home, I’m buying you a beer.  You’re one smart kid, Vladi.”

Vladi leaned in as if imparting a secret.  “I prefer Vodka, Mr. Fox.  Stolichnaya.  Niiice and cold.”

Mulder grinned at him affectionately.  “You sound like Alex.  Well, not the Mr. Fox part,” he corrected.  Vladi blushed more and his chest puffed up like a pigeon.

They drove up a rise and piled out into a sparse forest area.  “There,” Danny said.  He held up the coordinates Swensen had given them.

Mulder nodded, the cave face straight ahead of them about two hundred feet, like a lazy, yawning animal.

“Case the area,” Mulder told the group.  “Look for anything anomalous and let us know if you encounter anything strange or out of place at all.”  He looked at Caskel.  “Stay and guard the cave mouth.  We’ll be in touch by walkie talkie.”

Danny, Vladi, and Mulder went inside as the others ventured into the surrounding woods.

The cave was dank and dropped quickly down a series of loose boulders so that it became dark within moments and they turned their flashlights on.

About twelve feet down it leveled out somewhat and they continued single-file with Mulder first.  It was only about ten yards when Mulder’s flashlight beam refracted off of nothing and he stopped abruptly.

“What is it?” Danny asked.

“Do you see that?”  Mulder squinted and moved the beam a little.  “See?”

“Yyyyyeah…”  Danny said slowly.  “It’s like…”

“Bouncing,” Vladi interjected.

“It’s being refracted,” Mulder agreed softly, lips parted. He stepped closer.  The beam seemed to hit a wall that appeared clear except for where the light hit directly and there it shone a luminescent pale purple, waves of shimmering light undulating from the point of intersection like ripples in a pond.

“Don’t get too close,” Danny warned as Mulder took another step.

Mulder took another, never responding well to warning commands.  He tried to see past the energy field and was met only with the cave wall.  Mulder looked back behind them, shining the light that direction to ascertain if it was reflection of where they’d been or new wall formations.  He turned back, peering curiously.  It appeared different…not a reflection.  And besides, it wasn’t reflecting them either.  It didn’t make any sense.

“Vladi…”  Mulder called.  “Hand me a rock, will ya?”

Mulder turned slightly and watched the boy pick out a small rock amongst the boulders.  Danny smiled at Mulder slightly, pleased that Mulder wasn’t ignoring his young lover.  Vladi handed Mulder a smooth, fist-sized stone.  Mulder backed up, making the others retrace their steps as well.

“Might wanna duck,” he told them, and then he tossed the rock into the field.  It held there for a moment, jerking unnaturally, suspended in the light’s quick vibration.  Mulder almost forgot to duck when the rock came shooting back out at them.  “Shit,” he cursed, narrowly missing being knocked cold by his own projectile.  He turned around to the others, “Beats a boomerang.”

The words were scarcely out when they heard footsteps.  Caskel had not called and the others hadn’t used their walkie talkies either.  They wouldn’t just follow the three down without some warning.  Something was very wrong.

“Get back,” Mulder hissed, leaning against the craggily rock wall.  He looked about himself as the others followed suit.  “There,” he whispered.  He quickly made his way along the wall toward a natural enclave.  He motioned the others in, and they disappeared into the shadows, dousing their flashlights and trying not to breathe.

Mulder got as close to the edge as he dared, peeking around the corner to see a man holding a small, glowing light come down the path, unnaturally graceful as he walked around the loose rock.

Not one of theirs, was Mulder’s first thought.  He blandly walked down the boulder-strewn path past them, not so much as turning his head an inch.   The first man was followed by a second.  Their features were too-perfectly schooled.  The second one didn’t even blink, just following the first man like a lemming.  Danny tensed beside Mulder, but no one moved or dared the smallest whisper.

The second was followed by a third, just as expressionless and inhuman as the other two.  And Mulder watched, horrified, as the black oil suddenly swam over his eyes.

Then, one by one, they walked into the energy field.  It didn’t pick them up and jostle them like it had Parker or Mulder’s rock, and they weren’t ejected either.  They just…walked in…and disappeared.

Mulder waited a moment, listening.  When he heard nothing more, he touched Danny on the arm, unable now to see him.  Mulder took two steps out and realized they’d have to chance the flashlights.  There’d be no way out otherwise.  He couldn’t see his hand in front of his face much less a big boulder or drop-off.  He whispered back to the others, “Just follow me, and go fast.”

He flicked on his flashlight and began nearly running over the big rocks back the way they came.  He stumbled once, ripping his jeans and feeling the rock take a slice out of his leg.  He hissed and kept on, favoring his left leg now as he fought toward the light.

Mulder was almost out when he heard the yell behind him.  He gasped, going faster, breathing hard.

“Vladi!!” Danny yelled.

“Danny, go!”  Vladi’s voice came out of the darkness still close behind.

Mulder scrambled over rocks, slipping and sending loose gravel and small stones behind him.

“Fuck,” he cursed, getting his footing and scraping his hands raw on the rocks to try to get to the mouth of the cave which was so close now.  The waning sunlight beckoned him even as the sounds from behind pushed his pulse into the danger zone.

They were…inhuman…  Deep, hissing sounds.  And another all too human scream.

“Nnnnaahhhh!”

“VLADI!!!” Danny screamed in answer, and Mulder heard him slide to a stop.

He turned, shining his light on them.  Danny had hold of Vladi’s left hand and he was jerking, pulling, and Vladi was crying in agony.

Mulder ran down the rocks he’d just scrambled up on top of.  He’d been at the very mouth of the cave, his body half-bathed in light.  He barely registered the slimy black armor of the alien’s body…the empty eyes and hands that seemed all claw.  He passed Danny, pulling his gun, aiming it at the snarling head.  He fired.  The thing shrieked, tossing its head, tearing away from Vladi with a horrible ripping and crunching sound.

Vladi screamed and Danny choked on a cry of his own.  Blood spurted everywhere, splattering across Mulder’s face.  But the hissing sound was still fast closing from within the dark interior of the cave.

“Come on!!!” Mulder yelled over Vladi’s throat-torn cries.

Danny flung the kid’s left arm over his shoulders and started hauling him up and out while Mulder kept his gun aiming into the hissing darkness of the cave.  He fired.   Six or seven times.

“Mulder!!!” Danny yelled from the cave mouth.  Mulder turned to see Danny holding Vladi in the orange-pink light.  Vladi’s hand…  His right hand was…

Gone.

Mulder heard the shriek behind him and turned on instinct, firing eight rounds at the quickly approaching alien.

It screamed and then fell with a sickening thud, and Mulder turned, lungs aching, and launched himself out of the cave to the sound of Vladi’s one last head-splitting cry as the blood gushed from his severed arm and he lost consciousness.

……….

“Almost there…  Almost there…”  Danny chanted.

He’d wrapped the arm in his own shirt out in the field.  Tourniqueted it with a strip off the bottom as Mulder held the boy up.   Now Mulder held him again in the back of the truck as Danny dug quickly in his medical bag and pulled out some rubber tubing, gauze, and tape.

The kid was pale and grey in Mulder’s arms.   When his eyes rolled open, it wasn’t to fix on anything.  He just swallowed thickly and threw up without turning his head.

“Get him on his side,” Danny shouted and helped Mulder to turn him quickly so he wouldn’t choke.

Mulder willed Burke to drive faster.

He’d been the only one left.

Caskel was the first he’d seen and that’s because Mulder had tripped over him.  His body was horribly burned.  Radiation burned.  Mulder had stumbled over him, then just kept running.

They’d all been out there on the ground.  Nine bodies.  Burned a pale, bloody red where they weren’t positively charred, the skin peeling off the cooked tissue.

Burke had been hiding in the truck when they’d managed to drag themselves back to it.  “I’m sorry!” he’d hissed.  “I couldn’t…  I couldn’t…”

“Just drive!!!”  Mulder had yelled, hauling himself into the back and helping Danny get Vladi inside.

Vladi passed out again now, and Danny unwrapped the soaked shirt.  He got the arm tourniqueted again with the tubing.

“Hold it up,” he told Mulder.  His voice shook horribly.  Mulder’s throat closed on the sick pain, but he obeyed, keeping the limb elevated.

Mulder watched Danny wrap the stump in gauze, taping it to his forearm when he was done.  “Almost there,” he barely whispered, voice quaking madly as he dove back into the bag. “Almost there, baby.”

Danny withdrew a syringe and a vial of fluid, and he injected the kid with it.  Mulder had to assume it was antibiotics.

“Come on, come on, come on, come on, come on…”  Danny chanted through his breath.  Mulder didn’t know what to say to him, so he held Vladi’s arm up while Danny held the boy close.

Mulder dug in his pocket for his cell phone;  it slipped in his fingers.

“Mulder?” came Alex’s voice on the other end of the line after the first ring.

“Vladi’s hurt.  Have medics ready at the door,” Mulder said by way of greeting.  He couldn’t believe how steady his own voice was.

“Shit,” Alex gritted out.  “How bad, Mulder?”

Mulder hesitated just long enough.

“Fuck,” Alex hissed again.  He heard the fought-for control.  “How’s he hurt?”

Mulder could hear Alex moving.

“Hold on,” Alex told him just as Mulder opened his mouth.  Mulder heard him shout to somebody, “I need meds at the cave mouth NOW.”  Then, “Mulder?”

“It’s…”  Mulder started, but the bile rose in his throat.  He gagged it down.  “It’s his hand.  Alex…it was severed.”

A sob rose up and out of Danny, then, and Mulder ached to hold him…hold him tight enough to hurt.

The silence on the phone was palpable.  Mulder closed his eyes, but they opened as they bounced over the rough road into their base.

“Almost there,” Danny choked one last time.

………

“Fox…”

It was a breath. Horror and terrible fear lacing through it.

The medics had rushed Vladi in and away, Danny shouting orders with an authority and concise efficiency that Mulder had to admire.

It was him and Alex, now.  With Lars and a dozen bodyguards in attendance.  And Alex’s eyes swept over Mulder in sick disbelief.  Or maybe it was sick because of the very belief that it was absolutely true, and not just true but…inevitable.  Finally happening.

“Fox!”  Alex said a little louder, coming at him like a warrior against his injuries.

Mulder jumped a little before he could say, “It’s okay.”

Alex’s hands came for him and stopped, moving in front of his body, unsure where they could touch and not hurt him.  The prosthetic one twitched into a fist spasmodically.  Mulder’s eyes brimmed with tears.

“I’m fine, Alex,” he murmured.

Alex’s wide-eyed gaze lit on Mulder’s face and he exhaled loudly, a catch in it that would have to stand for all the relief he couldn’t set free just yet.  But Mulder’s lip trembled and Alex finally pulled Mulder to him, blood and all, and he buried his face in Mulder’s hair and breathed him in as Mulder fought back his tears.

Alex held him tightly for longer than he probably felt he should and shorter than Mulder wanted.  Then he drew back and Mulder could see that his own eyes were gleaming with emotion.

“Come inside,” he ordered Mulder.

Then he was Comrade Krycek again, giving instructions to Lars on sending out a task force to retrieve the bodies and to assign tighter security on their compound with double the forest spies already patrolling the perimeter of the base.

They spent most of the day hard at work going over the facts, creating game plans for how to proceeded next, and meeting with all the departments for an overview of where they stood.

They kept tabs on Vladi all day by means of intercom or walkie talkie with sick bay.  It wasn’t until evening when the two of them shared a look, knowing it was time, and made their way down to the compound’s large, sterile lab and recovery unit.

Danny looked terrible, with dark rings under his red eyes and a haunted, vague expression that hurt Mulder to look at.  Mulder noticed how Alex’s features hardened in response.  His posture, his stance and his energy said,  Don’t.  Don’t ask me.  Don’t have compassion for me.  Don’t make me be anything other than his leader right now.

But as they were led into the ICU and Alex saw the bloodied wrapping around Vladi’s arm…and the boy’s ashen face, Alex inhaled sharply and his whole body tensed.  Mulder thought it looked like the beginnings of a panic attack, maybe PTSD.  But as soon as it happened, it was gone.

Alex stayed a good distance from Vladi’s bed, just watching him sleep.  He stayed there in the room as Danny and Mulder spoke softly together.  He was silent and seemed to pay them little or no attention.  His whole being was focused on Vladi as he lay there amidst the white blankets.  Mulder looked at him when Danny left the room to get a much needed cup of coffee.  Alex’s eyes never wavered off of the boy.

They stayed for a long time, much longer than Mulder had expected.  Alex just seemed…rooted there, like some kind of mute guardian, watching Vladi unerringly until finally he drew breath and said, “Let’s go.”

Mulder nodded and then made their soft good-byes to Danny, touching his shoulder gently and following Alex out and into the elevator.  They didn’t speak all the way down to their quarters.

When they got inside, Alex shut their door and then grabbed Mulder, shoving him back against it hard.  He wrenched Mulder’s head back by the hair and kissed him, attacking his mouth as though he meant to devour him.

Alex undressed Mulder in a frantic hurry until he was naked, ripping his fresh, clean shirt.  Fully clothed himself, Alex got Mulder down on the floor not even all the way into their living room, wrestling Mulder’s willing body into the carpet, face down, spreading his legs and fumbling out his own cock and then burying himself deeply in Mulder’s ass with a growl.

Mulder was fucked hard and fast, then, his body jostled around on the floor as Alex bore down on him time and time again, holding Mulder in place and gasping and snarling.  Mulder tried to relax for his lover, letting his body be used.  He wasn’t being loved so much as possessed.  Alex’s cock was angry inside him, punishing him.    And Alex’s hands on him, holding him and pushing him down, never stroking, never taking care…only trying to hold time in place, to prevent the future, to bruise him compliant, to rape him raw and docile.  To somehow keep him safe underneath his assault.

Alex came with a roar, thundering down into Mulder’s ass hard, but slowing.  And as he slowed, his body began to shake.  Mulder felt the cock in him softening as Alex’s tears began to wet his shoulders.  Alex pulled out of his ass carefully and Mulder turned over underneath his lover who was up on his hands and knees and holding back his sobs.

Mulder reached up.  “C’mon,” he murmured, stroking across the set jaw.  He pulled behind his neck and stroked his hand down Alex’s chest, murmuring jibberish lovingly until Alex collapsed gently on top of him.

Mulder held him, arms wrapping around the quaking body covering his as far as they would go.

“Shhh,” he whispered.  “I’m right here.”  He ran his hand through Alex’s hair and kissed whatever skin he could reach.  “I’m all right, Alex, shhh…”

Then Alex gasped.  “OhgodMulder…  I hurt you.”

“Nonono,” Mulder murmured quickly into his neck.  “You didn’t,” he insisted, even though his ass burned and he was fairly sure there would be blood.  He didn’t want Alex to see.

Alex lifted his head and looked down at Mulder, then.  “Fox…” he shuddered.

Mulder cupped his face.  “We’ve done it hard before, you know,” he said, petting, coaxing.  “Alex, I’m fine, c’mere.”

Alex blinked rapidly, frowning, and then sank down on Mulder again, letting himself be lead into a soft kiss.  Mulder tongued his lips open and dipped inside, tasting tears and sweat and fear.  He stroked it away, lapping inside Alex’s mouth.

Mulder wrapped his legs around Alex, swallowing a hiss as his abused tissues tore a little more.  He held Alex tight, feeling like he couldn’t get him close enough.  He kissed him harder, twisting the lips over his and groaning.

“Make me burrito casserole,” he purred between kisses. “Feed me and then take me to bed.”

Alex relented, finally taking Mulder at his word that he wasn’t hurt.  He let Mulder shower alone…barely.  And he fussed over him when he got out, sitting him down on the couch while he put dinner in the oven and forcing a beer into his hand before scurrying off.  Mulder thought Alex’s scurry was impressively manly, but he kept that to himself.

They stroked each other to sleep that night, naked bodies close and warm.  Mulder came to orgasm just from Alex stroking his thighs and murmuring dirty things soft and rough into his ear while he did it.

“Easy,” Alex husked.

He didn’t want Mulder to get him off, so Mulder agreed to spoon up behind him and behave.  On Alex’s way into sleep, though, Mulder wrapped his cock in a warm fist and worked him expertly and quietly to release.

“Ohhhhh, you bastard,” Alex moaned as he came down.

“Go to sleep,” Mulder sighed.  Then very softly, “I’ve got you.”

……….

The first thing the kid said when he woke and was told of his condition was, “But I am no good with left for handjob.”

Well, that was more like the third thing.  The first was that he just cried.  He cried in Danny’s arms for several minutes, uninhibited like a child.  Then when he’d become tired of that, he’d sniffed and asked, “Was Comrade Krycek here?”

Two weeks later, he was released and put into immediate physical therapy with his new hand, a prosthetic, ordered by Alex himself with Danny’s help.

At first Alex just ignored the situation.  He’d keep busy with their next mission or say he had a meeting with Lars or even, “The kid’s doing fine without any help from me.”

But Mulder could tell it was eating at him.  The longing to rewrite history.  The ache to talk about it, if even in veiled encrypted code language.  Or Russian.  Mulder yearned to see Alex finally make up his bullheaded mind and go see the boy.

It was after breakfast on a Tuesday.  They’d just completed a long-planned mission to take over a military installation in southern California.  Alex had hardly had time to breathe for a full week.  Mulder thought he’d find some excuse to keep busy right away again, but Alex surprised him by wiping his mouth and standing, saying, “Think I’ll go see the kid.”

He was always 'the kid' with Alex.

Mulder smiled and nodded.  “Want me to go?”

Alex frowned, looking reluctant.  “I don’t…  I just think…”

“It’s okay,”  Mulder told him.  “You go.  I’ll come by later and treat you to lunch.”

When he showed up, Alex and Vladi were nowhere to be found.

Danny looked up from some papers.  “Out in nature,” he said without greeting.  Then, “Hey, sweetie,” with a smile of apology.

Mulder smiled at him.  “That birch tree?”

“Think so,” Danny answered.  “How’d you know?”

Mulder shrugged.  “I’m gonna grab him for lunch, do you wanna come?”

“Sure,” Danny said.  “But I gotta meet you there.  My printer’s got a glitch.”

Mulder found Vladi with Alex underneath the birch tree.  Both were sitting on the ground and Alex was demonstrating, with a serious frown on his face, how to pick up a twig with his prosthetic.

“Visualize your finger and thumb coming together,”  Alex was telling him.  “See it in your mind first.  And then feel it happen.”

Mulder stood back and watched for a few minutes as Vladi’s new fingers closed a fraction, but weren’t able to manage the stick several times.  Then Alex moved closer.  “Here,” he said.  And he took Vladi’s arm in his right hand gently.  So gently, Mulder noticed.  Then he reached out and put his left index finger on the underside of Vladi’s arm, near where his wrist would have been.

“Make it come from here,” Alex murmured, keeping his hands on the kid and waiting, watching his fingers, for a response.

Mulder knew he didn’t see the thrill of terror and joy cross Vladi’s face when Alex actually reached out and touched him.  And he wasn’t seeing the paralysis now.

“What’s the matter?”  Alex asked, still looking intently at the hand.  “You can do it, Vladi.  Just feel it.”

Mulder smothered a smile and approached.  “Boy needs a break,” he said.

Vladi jumped and pulled his arm free with a guilty-as-hell look at Mulder.  So it was a little crush was it?  Mulder smiled warmly at him and then back at his lover who’d finally turned his attention to something other than the kid’s new hand.

“They’ve got veggie burgers at the cafeteria,” Mulder told them with a swipe of his tongue across his lips.  Not to his surprise, Alex’s eyes dropped to his mouth and dilated.  He gave him the eyebrows when his gaze finally lifted back to Mulder’s eyes.  “Vladi?”  Mulder asked, looking to the kid.  “Wanna come eat with us?  Danny’s going.”

The boy’s eyes lit up and he looked at Alex, ducking his head.  A dark, sinfully sexy lock of near-black hair fell into his eyes.  Mulder grinned nostalgically.  Must be what Alex looked like back in the day, he thought.

He’d take his Alex any day.

Vladi got up and dusted himself off.  Alex was somewhat slower off the ground, but it was graceful as hell and made Mulder immensely proud.

“Wait…kid…”  Alex called as Vladi began to bound away like a gigantic puppy.  Vladi turned abruptly.  “Show Mr. Fox what I taught you,” Alex went on.

Mulder’s eyes widened on his lover and Alex shot him a sexy So-What-If-I-Did look.

“Oh!  Yes!  Mr. Fox, look!” called Vladi before running back to the tree, taking a leap and grabbing hold with his left, good hand.  He swung for a minute and then began pulling himself up in almost-there one-armed pull-ups.  He grunted with the effort and Mulder looked on with Alex, who had such a proud, happy look on his face that it made Mulder smile, too.

Mulder remembered the first time he’d come out looking for Alex and found him here doing one-armed pull-ups on that very branch.  God, he’d gotten the biggest fucking hard-on!  And drool?  Forget about it.  Alex hanging there shirtless, arm working to lift his entire body weight until his chin cleared the branch, tattoo showcased in the sun…  Mulder had pulled Alex down, jerked him around to the other side of the tree, ripped his pants open and gone down, jacking himself off inside his jeans as he did it.

Later, at home, Alex had explained that he didn’t like going to the gym like the others.  He did sometimes but said he knew the others were looking at him and it made him self-conscious.

“Yeah, because you’re fucking GORGEOUS!” Mulder had declared.  “Not to mention you could kick all their asses with no hands, Alex, that’s why!”

He’d shrugged, but he’d gone to the actual gym a little more, Mulder was pleased to see.  But he still went out to that tree sometimes.

Mulder had been forbidden to watch for obvious reasons.

“Wow, Vladi,”  Mulder said now.  “You’re like a little Alexei.”

That one got a look from both of them.  One surprised and just a little guarded.  Another stunned to gaping at the comparison.  Mulder grinned and turned to go inside for lunch.

……….

“Yeah, but have you seen the cave structure?”  Mulder was asking Danny around about three fries in his mouth.  “There’s no way that’s natural.”

“I agree it’s strange, but I don’t think we should jump to conclusions,” was Danny’s answer.

Mulder rolled his eyes at the man across the table from him.  “But Danny…”

Alex shoved another fry into Mulder’s mouth.  “Hey!”  Mulder yelled, but then had to laugh.  He reached out and flicked Alex’s ear as he chewed and Alex shooed him away with a frown Mulder knew was faked.  As a result, Mulder scooted his chair closer and put his hand on Alex’s thigh affectionately, leaning his head into the crook between chest and arm as Alex’s arm came around his chairback.  He continued his conversation with Danny like that while Vladi simply stuffed his face with burger with a, “Sheesh er goosh.”

Danny winked at Vladi and his expression softened.

“I just think caves forming points around a disk-shape…”  Mulder tried.

“Yeah, you’re right.  I’m just…”  He gestured in the air frenetically, indicating, as he liked to do now, his stress level.

“We know,” Alex rumbled.

“Yeah, we know,” Vladi added.

Danny lazily slapped the air in front of the kid’s face with a little whip sound.  “You of all people…” he told Vladi.

“He only wants to have the sex not even everyday now,” Vladi continued.

“C’mere, punk,”  Danny replied, pulling the boy’s chair in roughly and attacking his neck with growling kisses which made Vladi laugh like a loon.

“Yeah, you’re all precious,” Lars said then from behind the two of them.

Mulder smiled at him brilliantly.  “Lars,” he said, putting his foot against the fifth empty chair and pushing it out without sacrificing his spot at Alex’s side.  “Join us.”

“For this?”  Lars practically sneered, indicting Danny and Vladi.  “Not if you paid me.”

“I do pay you,” Mulder responded.

Lars scoffed and Alex couldn’t seem to help a deep chuckle.

“Lars, where’s that wife of yours anyway?  If she doesn’t pop up soon I’m going to start thinking she doesn’t exist,” Mulder told him.

“She’s…” he started.  He looked uncomfortable.  “She’s got cramps.”

“Man, you are clueless,”  Danny told him.  “You can’t tell us shit like that.”

Lars frowned.

“Ees not your wife bodyguard for Turgenev?”  Vladi asked, now over his giggle fit.

“Yeah…”  Lars said, suspicious.  You couldn’t help but get that way when Vladi was speaking.  You just never knew what he was about to say next.

“Well,” the kid went on.  “You be careful that she not have a kick in your ass.”

Everybody but Lars laughed.

“She’s gonna kick his ass, honey,”  Danny helped.

“She gonna kick your ass!”  Vladi declared happily.

Lars stalked away to the sound of their table’s raucous laughter.

“What’d you come by for?”  Mulder called as the others’ laughter started to die down.

“There’s a woman…a Dr. Scully in quarantine.  She wants to see you,” Lars shot back over his shoulder at Mulder.

Mulder started, looking to Alex who had also tensed.  “Scully…”  Mulder breathed.

Alex squeezed his shoulder once.  “Go,” he said.

Mulder looked at him for a moment, but then nodded.  He pushed his chair out and stood, looking around at the others and then turning to go to the small quarantine lab on the surface level, leaving Alex to explain things if he saw fit.

When he got there, he was a little breathless.  It had been…how long?  Nearly five months since they’d seen one another?   He found himself jogging down the hall that would take him to the place where new arrivals whose vaccination history was in question were kept and tested.

He saw her hair first as he came into the antechamber that overlooked the exam room.

“Mr. Mulder,” greeted the woman whose job it was to do the blood tests.

“Louise…”  Mulder answered absently.

“She’s been cleared, sir.”

“Thank you,” he said, nodding in her direction and pulling the door open that would put him in the same room with her.  He found that he was sick to his stomach with nerves.

“Scully…” he said softly.

She turned quickly and took him in, her face a little gaunt and colorless.  “Mulder,” she breathed.

He went toward her but wasn’t sure what he was supposed to do.  He looked at her, shocked, and the look on her face was one of pained uncertainty.  He let out all his breath and grabbed her, pulling her into a fierce hug.  “Scully…” he breathed in relief.  He just held onto her tiny frame for a moment, having forgotten what it was like to hold a woman.  He’d spent so much time in Alex’s company…in his arms.  This was so strange now.

“What are you…?”  He held her at arm’s length, now, and leaned down a little to speak to her.  She looked exhausted and sad.  “Are you…ill?” he asked, feeling his lunch pitch in his gut.  Please don’t say it, he begged silently.  Please don’t have it again.

“I’m fine,” she said on a shaky sigh.  “It’s not…that,” she finished.  She looked up at him with a small, frail smile, her eyes swimming with tears.  “Mulder…” she croaked.

“It’s okay,” he said, pulling her to him again.  He rested his chin lightly on top of her head.  “Scully…  It’s okay now,” he told her.  But he wasn’t even close to sure it was.

………

She simply slept for a day and a half.  When she woke, she called their quarters.  Mulder answered, not using the speaker phone with an apologetic look at Alex.  For everyone else they came as a set.  Alex just shook his head, kissed Mulder’s temple, and went to take a shower.

Mulder went to her room which had been hastily set up by a woman from Lars’ team and by Vladi.  Alex had made him do it both because he said it would be good physical therapy and because:

“The kid’s got a mean eye for home decor.  Have you seen their bedroom?”

Mulder had quipped, “No.  Have you?”

He’d been pleasantly tumbled for that.   A quickie but a goodie.

They’d spoken little of Scully.  Mulder wasn’t sure what he needed to say.  Alex didn’t seem too perturbed, saying only that she’d be an invaluable asset should she decide to stay…if she decided to work with Danny for instance.

Mulder and Scully sat on her sofa and talked.  It was awkward and stilted in places.  Mulder asked why she’d come.  First she said it was because of his email.  Then she bit her lip.

“It’s hell, you know,” she told him.

He continued to looked into her haunted face.

“It’s like it’s not real.  Everyday you wake up…and there’s that moment of relief.  But then…”  She shook her head and Mulder took her hand in his.  “No place is safe.  Mulder, I left the FBI two months ago.”

He had not known this.  He looked at her with wide eyes.

“They took it over,” she told him.

He frowned.

“It wasn’t public.  Wasn’t even private.  It was designed to be as inconspicuous as possible.  Probably so you wouldn’t know.  I didn’t until…”  She swallowed then went on.  “One day Skinner came to me…  He told me to go home since I was feeling so ill.”  She looked at Mulder.  “I felt fine.  But I went home.  My suitcase was out on the bed, opened.  When I searched it, I found a note in the lining.  It said that if I didn’t leave…I’d be killed.”

“Scully…”

“It said that if I contacted you…”  She just swallowed.  “It was Skinner.  I don’t know where he is, Mulder.  I think he stayed.  I think he thinks that’s the place where he’s supposed to fight them.”

Mulder’s voice was very soft, then.  “Where’s yours?”

She took a long moment to answer.  “I left with my mother.  We went to my aunt’s in Michigan.  But Mulder…  They’re everywhere.”  She looked at him imploringly.

“I know,” he said.

She nodded, realizing he would know this.  She looked around the room.  “It’s nice…here,” she said in a small voice.

“What happened?  In Michigan?” he prodded.

She wiped her eyes.  “I couldn’t stand it, Mulder.”

He thought about making a joke…  “All the damned lakes?” or something, but her face discouraged the levity.  She’d been living a very different life.  For all the danger and waging of war in his own, hers was sounding far more trying.

“I couldn’t…” she continued.  “I couldn’t…  The stillness.  The doing nothing.”  She turned her face up to his and he saw, for the first time, a glimmer of the old determination.  “I told my mother to take Aunt Sharon and go up into the woods…that I had to go.  That I had to do something.  Mulder, I’ve missed you.”

He sighed and opened his arms, pulling her in and stroking her back.  “I missed you, too,” he said.  “I’m sorry….about what you’ve been through.”

She pulled away.  “I miss the work,” she admitted.  “I can’t just stand by and watch it happen.”  Then she looked squarely into his eyes.  “Mulder…what can I do?”

He smiled.

………..

They toured medical, and Scully met Danny.  They hit it off right away.  Mulder smiled as they immediately fell into a dialogue about the vaccinations, the mutation of the virus into a gestation catalyst, methods for treatment, for administering the vaccine in the air somehow…mutating it themselves to actually kill the aliens, not just inoculate the public.

Scully said the word aliens unmockingly.

Hallelujah amen.

Mulder offered to take her to lunch and show her the rest of the facility, but she declined, wishing to stay and learn more.

She hardly left after that.  And for once, Danny was bearable.

Alex and Scully avoided each other religiously.  Which was difficult since they both wanted to consult with Mulder.  Alex, of course, did more than consult, but because of that, unless Alex had pressing business, he was usually with Mulder.

The first meeting they had, Scully wouldn’t meet Alex’s eyes, sitting stonily silent, jaw clenched.  Mulder was glad Alex didn’t vary his speaking style for her, maintaining his authority and just ignoring her refusal to work under him.  She could barely work near him.  She was there, at least.  She needed to be to understand how they worked and what was going on at all times.  But since she wasn’t going to be on the front lines, Mulder didn’t see the need to push her into taking direct orders from Alex.  It could work like the game Telephone when you were a child…everything from Alex coming through Mulder and landing in Scully’s inbox.

She’d left quickly after that first meeting, avoiding Mulder as well inasmuch as he’d been next to Alex.

The day she found out Danny and Alex had been lovers was a little amusing.

For a while.

Mulder had been there, sifting through Danny’s findings on possibly mutating the vaccine to be something of a lethal injection to the gestated alien.

“So how did you get mixed up in this?” Scully had asked Danny.  “You seem pretty…”

“Normal?” Danny concluded.  “Make love not war?  Yeah.”

Scully lifted her eyebrow.

Danny answered, unwaveringly.  “Alex brought me in.  Then he had sex with me.”

Scully gasped.  Mulder fought a snicker.  It was just so…Victorian…or something.

“He…he…?”

“It was consensual,” Danny assured her.  As if it wouldn’t be! Mulder thought.  “And the affair didn’t last for very long.  He, uh…moved on ta Foxy,” Danny added unexpectedly.

“Daniel…”  Mulder warned, not looking up, blushing furiously.  He shot a surreptitious look Scully’s way.  She looked queasy.  Great.  Danny opened his mouth to say more, only knowing he was embarrassing Mulder, not that he was freaking Scully out.  “All right.  ‘Nuff sharing,” Mulder stated.  “Scully, you wanna go for a walk?”

He watched her swallow and then nod jerkily.  Time for damage control.

He took her on the path to the tree.

“I should have guessed,” she breathed, looking for all the world like she was going to vomit.

“I’m sorry,”  Mulder began.  “I was going to tell you, Scully.”

She nodded.  “I can understand why you didn’t want to.”

He frowned.  “I’m not ashamed of it,” he said.

She looked considering.  “I just meant what with my reaction to…him just being your partner,”  she clarified.  “What did Danny mean…he moved on to you?”

Mulder made an exasperated sound, throwing his head back.  “Clusterfuck,” he moaned.

Scully looked at him questioningly.

“Sorry.  It’s something Vladi’s learned, so he uses it all the time.  But he says it when Danny cooks broccoli into something at dinner.”  He smiled wryly.  “I think it fits better here.”  He sighed.  “It wasn’t like that,” he started, knowing Danny had just set him up perfectly so that he would have to explain everything.  “Alex and I weren’t even having sex when he stopped seeing Danny.”

Scully winced at the easy way he said it.  Having sex.  He’d forgotten why anyone would have a problem with it.  Nobody in all of their sixty thousand plus here ever expressed any reservations about his and Alex’s relationship.  Of course they wouldn’t.

“It actually took us a while,” Mulder said as they approached the tree.  “In fact…”  He took a breath.  “We kind of waited until we…until there were some pretty powerful…feelings…between us…”

Scully inhaled measuredly.  “How do you know he’s not…?”

Mulder laughed shortly.  “I know, Scully,” he said with surety.  “Danny likes to tease.  But Alex isn’t a player.   This isn’t what Danny made it sound like.  And I know what I’m doing.   I know him, Scully.  He knows me.”

She looked at the ground and thought for a few seconds before she spoke again.  “So you…live with him?”

“We live together, yes,” Mulder replied.

“And you really…?  You…”

“I love him,”  Mulder said, coming to a stop.

Scully studied him for a time under the tree.  The light was fading.

He took a deep, bolstering breath.  “And he loves me,” he said gently but with every confidence.  “He loves me, Scully.”

She frowned, but it was more that she was still considering very deeply.  “Mulder…”

“I know it must sound crazy,” he allowed.  “But…  Scully…you’ll see it.”  He swallowed and took both of her hands in his.  “Now that you know…  Scully, it’s such a relief.  I know it must be difficult to take in, but on this end it’s just…  I’m so glad I don’t have to hide.”

She smiled at him tremulously.  “It was actually harder to know you were working with him,” she confessed.  “This…  I see the change in you, Mulder.  And it’s good.”  She laughed a little incredulously.  “It’s so good to see you happy.”  And then she laughed a little more, the sound just bubbling out of her beyond her control.

He supposed it was extremely bizarre and ridiculous.  He, too, laughed at the irony.  “Took the end of the world and a gay love affair with my ex-enemy, but…”  He sobered.  “Yeah…  I am.  Thank you, Scully.”

On their way back to the installation, they met Alex on the path with Vladi in tow.  Alex immediately stiffened, his eyes going a cold, grey-green.  They stopped, and Mulder felt Scully coiling up behind him.

“Comrade Krycek!”  Vladi called, jogging up behind.  “Comrade Krycek, I pick up stone and I…”  He saw the other two and smiled.  “Mr. Fox!  Dr. Scully!  We are going to tree.  Mr. Fox, did you know Comrade Krycek…”

“Alex, Vladi,”  Alex corrected quietly.

“That Comrade Alex,”  The kid blushed furiously. “Can fire gun with left hand?  Or that he throw or catch baseball?  Or…”

“Yeah,”  Mulder interrupted mildly.  “I know what he can do with it.”  He gave Alex a warm smile and reached out, taking his prosthetic hand and curling his fingers around it.  He felt Alex’s hesitation in front of Scully, but then the cool digits closed gently around his own.

“Comrade Alex!”  Vladi exclaimed.  “There is little time for intimate relations now.”

Mulder raised his eyebrows at Alex.  “Intimate relations?” he mouthed.

Alex licked his lips and dropped his gaze to the ground on a put-out sigh.

“Well, you guys have fun,”  Mulder said then.  And he leaned in toward Alex and brushed his lips over the other man’s, lingering there until his lover softened and kissed him back tentatively…and then a little more assertively…aggressively, opening Mulder’s mouth on a short groan and thrusting his tongue inside.

Mulder drew back and squeezed the hand in his, releasing it and feeling the delay before it let go of his.

“See you at dinner,” Mulder said to Alex.  Then to Vladi, “And no firing on innocent trees, boy.”

“Oh, no,” Vladi stated emphatically.  “We are going to be writing!”

Alex inhaled guiltily even before the kid went on.

“Poetry!” the kid exuberantly declared.

Alex actually flinched.

Mulder’s smile was slow.  “I look forward to reading it,” was all he said.  Then he and Scully turned down the path and left.

That night, Mulder asked Alex, “Teaching the kid new phrases are we?”  At Alex’s uncomprehending look he elaborated. “Intimate relations?”

Alex laughed shortly.  “Oh.  That.”

“What else have you taught him?”  Mulder asked.  “The things you told him not to say in public, Alex,” he enunciated.

Alex smiled secretively.  “Well…” he began, putting down his napkin.  “Danny’s sure gonna get a surprise.”

Mulder laughed and that was all his partner would say on the subject.  Mulder was also shown no poetry whatsoever.  He pouted, but all he got was a consolation…a rim job whose effects were probably heard five stories up.

Things since the day at the tree had been more normal between Alex and Mulder in front of Scully, and Mulder noticed that she really did her best with it.  She spent a lot of time in the lab doing research with Danny and their team whose specialists now included a biotoxicologist, a geologist, several surgeons, and two virologists whose non-stop bickering seemed to be a source of amusement for one and all.  They all welcomed Scully, though.  She was respected for her extensive work with the paranormal rather than snubbed for it.  In this crowd, such work and the knowledge and experience derived from it were treasured.  Autopsying a Flukeman was an unspeakable accolade.

Mulder loved seeing his former partner given such high regard both for her medical expertise and for her firsthand knowledge of paranormal and extraterrestrial phenomena.

“Hey, Scully,” he called, interrupting an argument she was having with Diagalev, one of the virologists.  The other, Hullenburg, was looking on with barely contained glee.

She turned to Mulder in relief.  “Hi, Mulder.”

The other two wandered away, continuing the argument between the two of them as they made their way out into the hall, past Mulder.

“Made any headway on…”

He couldn’t finish because there was a commotion down the hall.  Scully jumped up as a gurney was quickly pushed down the corridor past the stunned virologists in the direction of the emergency facility.  Someone poked their head in and declared to Scully, “Three coming down here and five more up top.  Dr. Peterson wants you to hurry to the surface.”

Just then the intercom came on with Alex’s voice.  “All department heads excepting medical personnel to Conference Room C.  Code Six.”

………

They’d been ambushed during a raid on a small military installation over the border in Kansas.  They’d gotten word that the base itself was a cover for yet another underground ship.  They’d gone in as prepared as they could, all helicopters at the ready, a black ops team outfitted for battle with human and alien alike.

But the base itself had been cloaked in the forcefield.  For all they knew, the reflection of the base within was a manufactured hologram and never real at all.  They’d been detected when the first soldier had accidentally made contact with the field.  Just a second’s worth of contact.  But it was enough.

Swarms of aliens appeared out of the distorted air and attacked.  Only ten of their own survived and eight of them were badly injured.  Five critical.  Another huge loss.

“We’ve got two problems,” Alex stated from the head of the large oval table.  He was coldly seething, eyes near black.  Mulder swallowed and waited for him to go on.  “The first is that we can’t penetrate their defense.  The cloak is not only a way for them to hide in plain sight…it’s an alarm system that we don’t know we’ve triggered until it’s too late.”  He looked around the table.  “We can’t get in, and we can’t see it to know when we’re about to alert them to our presence.”

Mulder spoke up, pulling at his bottom lip in worry.  “But the team had infrared laser sites.  They should have bounced off the field.”

Alex looked at him.  “They did.  They bounced off one layer of the field…the one barely visible to the human eye.   Barnes.”   Alex indicated one of two troops seated at the far end of the table.  The two that came back uninjured.

The man nodded at Alex and addressed the room.  “There was another field.  Invisible.  Before the cloak.  We think the first is the alarm trip.”  He glanced at Alex before continuing.  “We think it extends about a foot from the cloaking field, so…  We at least know now…”  His voice trailed off.  He was visibly shaken by the slaughter he’d witnessed.

“Thank you, Barnes,” Alex said, relieving him from going on.  “But our primary problem isn’t our inability to infiltrate the cloak.”  He swallowed.  “We still don’t have a viable attack against them in anything other than one-on-one combat.  Judging by schematics drawn up by Mr. Mulder’s team, it appears the largest of their crafts may extend underground beneath five states, holding perhaps hundreds of thousands if not millions of gestated aliens.”  He swallowed.  “We don’t have the numbers or the technology to take down a force that massive.  We’re here today to talk about the realities of the situation…”  He blinked furiously.  “And to discuss the more…extreme possibilities of attack.”

Mulder exhaled slowly, feeling nauseous.  Extreme possibilities of attack.

“Nuclear attack?”  Mulder asked, incredulous.  “Are you serious?”

Alex turned hard eyes on him.  “There are storehouses…  Russian and American…  Missile silos left untapped by either government, the missiles held there never intended for use on each other but on Them.  They’re under Consortium control now…up north of Montana in Canada…  It’s a last resort, but…”

“You’re damn right it is!”  Mulder shouted.  “You’re talking about ending human life, Alex, not just the aliens.  Do you know what you’re suggesting?”

Alex swallowed tightly.  He just stared at Mulder dispassionately.  Mulder shoved his chair back, knocking it over in the process.  He was storming out of the room when the entire installation rocked under the rumbling strain of what felt like an earthquake.

Alex jumped up and ordered the leaders to their departments.  “Mulder…” he breathed as the facility shook.

Mulder nodded at him, jaw clenched and they strode out together, headed for the elevators.  The ride to the surface was tense.  Alex stood with his hands balled into fists about two feet from Mulder.

“What do you think it is?”  Mulder asked.

“If I had to guess…” he answered.  “I’d have to say we’re getting a visit from the rebels.”

Mulder inhaled and listened to the dull roaring and the feminine voice, unperturbed by it as she announced their ascension.

They were surrounded by bodyguards immediately after stepping off the elevator.  Alex plowed forward, chin ducked, and Mulder was close behind but feeling the bitter chasm between them like a mile-wide rift.  He tried to focus only on the issue at hand.  And it wasn’t hard when the doors slid open on the starry night sky, interrupted by a looming, charcoal-dark triangle, lit suddenly from the bottom as a blue-hued beam struck the earth below in an instant flash.

They came forward, Mulder and Alex standing together, and waited as three figures, two bigger and one small floated eerily to the ground before them.  The two larger ones were…  Mulder shook his head, flashing on himself inside a truck and…  Their faces…

They have no faces!  They have no eyes!  Scully’s trance-induced voice in his head.

Their orifices were sewn shut.  And between them stood a child, perhaps nine or ten, a little girl with long, dark hair pulled back from her clear face.  She had not been sewn.  She was just…a child.  A normal, human child.

“Greetings to you,” she said calmly.  She looked to Alex first and then mildly blinked over to Mulder.  The two rebels held out their empty hands, palms up.  The girl continued, “We come without weapons.  We come to intercede.  We come to impart knowledge.  Will you have this information?”

Mulder frowned down at the little girl.  “We?”

She looked up from one rebel to the other, then back at Mulder, expressionless.  “You know us as the Alien Resistance.  You know we burned your brethren…your…”  The girl looked behind Mulder and Mulder turned to see Scully walking slowly out into the light, a look of horror on her face.  “The ones the Colonists have chosen.  We do not apologize for this.  But we wish you to know we mean this one no harm now.”

Scully’s hand shot to the back of her neck with a grimace.  She shook her head slowly, blinking.

“We have used the implant to tell her now of our new plans,” the girl said.  Mulder looked back down to her as she spoke.   “I am here to facilitate your knowing.  Since you do not have implants, I will speak for the Rebels.”

“Are you human?”  Mulder asked the girl.

“Yes,” was the answer.

“Are you their…prisoner?”

She tilted her head as if Mulder were the curious specimen.  “I was saved from the Project.  I am a Special One.  There are others who were saved.  From what you call the Consortium.  We have special powers of thought which you call telepathy.  We facilitate knowledge.”

“For the alien resistance?” Alex asked now.

“Yes.  We communicate for them.”

“You…want to do this?”  Mulder asked incredulously.

The girl blinked at him.  “We do this because no one else can.”  She looked to Alex.  “But it is of no concern at this time.”

“What do you mean of no concern?  You’re children!” Mulder demanded.

“We are the Special Ones,” she repeated.  “Would you have us on tricycles when the world is at war?”  The girl looked behind Mulder again.  “She would.”  Then she turned her gaze back to Mulder.  “You are unsure.  You are bothered.  It makes no difference.  You cannot change this.  You can only listen.”  She looked at Alex.  “This one wants to listen.”  Then she looked at Mulder again.  “You would be wise to put aside these feelings that do not serve.”

Mulder swallowed.

“We know how to kill them,” the girl stated plainly then.

Mulder’s eyes went wide.  He felt Alex’s endorphin-rushed tension beside him.  Mulder swallowed again convulsively, staring down at the girl.  She stared back at him placidly.

“Go on,” Mulder whispered.

“Sound,” the girl said, simply.  “The ships, the aliens, the oil-possessed.  They are attached by a cord of low frequency sound.  Extremely low.  Humans cannot hear it.  Nothing of earth can except dolphins and whales.  They have been very sad,” she added.

“So disrupting this frequency can kill them?” Alex asked.

“No,” replied the girl.  “Disrupting it can only disorganize them until they can return the frequency to its normal setting.”

“But you said sound could kill them,” Mulder replied.

“Yes.  You must do more than disrupt their frequency.  You must enforce one of your own.  One that is the opposite of theirs.  Something very high.  We have that frequency.”

Mulder shot his gaze to Alex.  The other man looked at him as well, frowning, before turning his attention back to the rebels’ translator.

“How do we do it?”  Alex asked.

“It cannot be done anywhere but within their cloaking device,” she told them.  “Sound can only pass the barrier from the inside.  It cannot infiltrate, just as you cannot.”  She looked to Mulder.  “They are very sophisticated.”

Mulder frowned.  “But we don’t have a way in yet.”

“Neither do we,” replied the girl.  “This is what we know.  Now you know as well.  It is our hope that you will find a way to use it if we cannot.”  The girl handed over a simple round disk.  “This holds the frequency.  If placed on the corresponding receiver pad, it will automatically activate the new sound wave.  The frequency is in the oil.  They will not be able to sustain their vibration, and they will demolecularize.”

Mulder fingered the disk, turning it over, then he handed it to Alex.

“We conclude our visit now unless there are further questions you wish to ask,” she said.

Mulder looked at her for a moment.  “What’s your name?” he asked.

She blinked.  “Vanessa,” was the answer.

………

They left noiselessly, having imparted their information.  Mulder and Alex turned with a look at one another and proceeded back inside.  Scully turned as well, walking on the other side of Mulder from Alex.

The only thing Alex said was, “New meeting.”

In the elevator, Mulder glanced at Alex, feeling Scully’s presence acutely.  He didn’t want to do this in front of her.

“Home first,” he told Alex.

“What?”

Mulder looked at him.  “Before you call another meeting.”  His eyes drilled into Alex.  “I need to see you at home first.”  He enunciated perfectly around his tense jaw.

Alex looked at him for a moment, then he dropped his gaze and nodded.

The elevator dropped Scully off at sick bay.  She glanced nervously from Mulder to Alex and then back.  “I’ll be in touch,” she said, then walked away, leaving them alone with their guards.

They kept quiet until they were in their quarters.  Then Mulder turned on Alex.

“You are not calling one more fucking meeting without talking to me first.”

Alex’s eyes narrowed.  “We’d just lost fifty men and women in a blood bath, Mulder.  I didn’t have time…”

“You make time!”  Mulder shouted, hands on hips, advancing a couple of steps.  “You think deciding on nuclear annihilation without consulting me was a good thing?  You think they need to hear us fighting at a time like this?  Huh, Alex?”

“You’re the one who put up an argument, Mulder!”  Alex growled, taking a step in himself.  They were a foot apart now.

“You forced my hand!” Mulder answered, leaning in, eyes sparking.  “Nuclear weapons, Alex?!  What were you thinking?!”  Then Mulder turned and stalked away.  “God, you dangerous FUCK!”

Alex swallowed, his teeth gritting dangerously.  “We can’t be idealists anymore, Mulder,” he hissed.  “Jesus, you live in the fucking clouds!  We’re LOSING!”

Mulder gasped.  Then he laughed shortly, turning back to Alex.  “That what you’re telling Vladi?  That he needs to learn to use his hand in time for his inevitable demise?”  Alex blinked at him and Mulder walked back into him, grabbing him by the shirt and hauling him in close.  “We have not come this far to say the hell with it.”  He softened his tone with effort.  “Alex…  We’re still in this.  As long as you or I are still breathing, dammit.  Don’t you understand that?”

Mulder’s hands loosened, Alex’s breath hitting him in the face.   Mulder smoothed his trembling hands back behind Alex’s head, eyes tearing, the anger leaving him.  He held onto Alex now, feeling his incredible heat.

“We knew,” Mulder whispered.  “We knew, Alex…that it would happen this way.”  He swallowed and Alex’s eyes stared deeply into his.  Mulder thought he saw a glimmer of hope there.  “We’re not meant to go down in a mushroom cloud. And if we die for this, Alex…  It’s not going to be so that the entire human race goes down with us.”

Alex swallowed, his own eyes moist and now very, brilliantly green.  “I’m sorry,” he whispered.

Mulder pulled him in roughly and kissed him hard, bruising their lips and attacking with his tongue, holding the other man’s head in place.  When he was breathless, he drew back, panting.  He leaned his forehead on Alex’s.  “You fucked up, Lexi,” he murmured shudderingly.

Alex nodded, hands coming up, one threading through Mulder’s hair, the other pulling him gently in.  “I’m sorry…”  His fist tightened against Mulder’s scalp.  “I need you,” he breathed.  “I need you, Fox.”

“I know,” Mulder said gently.  He kissed Alex one more time, then rubbed his cheek against his lover’s.  “Just remember that.”  He turned his lips to Alex’s ear.  “I need you, too.”

Alex laughed self-deprecatingly.  “You need a dangerous fuck?”

Mulder breathed into his neck.  “Yessss…  Don’t you get that by now?”

………..

So now their one and only objective was to break the cloak.

They’d tried attacking via helicopter…just exerting sheer fire power on it, showering its surface with gunfire and short-range missiles.  It was to no avail.  They bounced off like children’s toys.

It wasn’t even really confirmed that such as thing as drastic and final as a nuclear explosion would have the desired effect.

They were back to the drawing board.

Scully and Danny were still working on a supervaccine that might facilitate in a fight against the individual aliens as kind of a side project to breaking the defense.

“What about heat?”  Danny asked as he and Scully and Mulder sat around the lab talking things over one day.  “We’ve been kind of attacking it with blunt force.  Maybe a severe temperature change?”

Mulder popped a seed into his mouth and sucked thoughtfully.  When he’d chewed it and swallowed, he reached over and took a long guzzle of the orange juice Alex had made him take with him that morning.  It was just the sniffles.  Alex could be such a…a wife sometimes.

“You have no spleen,” Alex had railed at him, thrusting the orange juice at him and shoving vitamins into his pockets.

“There just doesn’t seem to be a viable way of testing your theory that won’t get the team killed,” Scully answered Danny, frowning.

“You’re just a baw of sudshide,” Mulder told her, and then sneezed spectacularly.

“Back at you, Mulder,”  Scully said on a concerned frown.

She came over to feel his forehead, and he evaded her mothering.  “I get this enough at hobe,” he whined.

She sighed, hands on hips.  “Shouldn’t you be there getting some rest?” Scully asked.

“It’s just the sdiffles,” he said in annoyance.  “I’b fide.”

She rolled her eyes and went back to her chair, sitting heavily.  After ten more minutes of throwing around differing hypotheses, Alex came barreling through the door.

“Danny, I need you to organize a medical team for the surface.  We’ve got a large group coming in today for vaccination,”  Alex said.  Danny nodded and started to stand.

Mulder sneezed and Alex turned on him.

“Mulder, for God’s sake go home,” Alex said.  “That’s an order.”  Then Alex’s eyes shot to Scully and his mouth gaped for a moment before he shut it, nodding once and turning.

Scully took a breath.  “Krycek,” she called.

Mulder watched Alex stop in the door and then turn, eyes narrowed.  Scully looked at Alex squarely, seriously.  “What are my orders?” she asked, voice tight.

“What?” Alex asked in a gravelly whisper.

She sighed.  “I know who gives the orders around here.  Just because it comes from Mulder in the form of a request…”  She dropped her gaze and took another calming breath before she glanced back up at the man she’d not said two words to since her arrival.  “If you have something that needs to be done…tell me.”

Alex blinked at her, cutting his gaze to the side to Mulder for a brief moment, before returning to Scully’s composed face.  He nodded.  “I, uh…  I need you to handle any of the new ones that come this way.  There’ll be some in bad shape.”

Scully nodded and Alex nodded in return.  Mulder watched him turn to leave.  He stopped at the door, glancing at Mulder from under his lashes.  “I meant that about home, Mulder,” he said.  “Your immunity’s compromised, so you certainly shouldn’t be here.”

When Mulder didn’t say anything, Alex turned to him.

“What?  What is it?” Alex asked.

Mulder was deep in thought as he stared at Alex.  He whispered, “Lowered ibbudity…”

Scully asked, “What?”

“He said…lowered immunity,” Alex husked.  He walked back into the room slowly.

Mulder’s gaze shot around to everyone, but landed on Alex.  “What do they have in cobbod?”

“What?” asked Danny.

“He said in common,” Alex husked, frowning in thought.

“Yes, in cobbod!” Mulder exclaimed.  “The wuds who walk through the fiewd!”  He waited a beat.  “The oil!” he declared.  “Anywud idfected with the oil can just walk id!”

“So…” Scully started, eyebrows raised.

“Infect some poor sap?” Danny asked, also looking at Mulder like he’d lost his mind.

“Hear be out,” Mulder said excitedly.  “If we lowered the ibbudity of somwud awready vaccidated, could we then idject theb with the virus id such a way that it would idhabit theb but not nessecariwy codtrol theb?”  Mulder looked around the room.  “What would it take to do that?”

Danny frowned.  “Well…maybe a…very weak strain of the virus?”

Scully interjected,  “Or maybe just a very immunilogically compromised vaccinated host...”

“You could do that?” Alex asked.

Danny answered.  “It’s probably a longshot, I mean…”  He looked at Scully, leaning forward.  “Doesn’t it attach itself to the pineal gland?”

“Yes,” she answered, thoughtful.  “That may pose a problem.  We don’t want it to attach because then it’s controlling the body…but if we somehow block the gland, it’ll…”

“Leave the host,” Danny answered slowly.  He sat up a little straighter.  “Not to mention…didn’t that little girl,”  He shook his head.  “The Rebels…say that this high frequency sound wave affected the oil?”

Mulder nodded.  “Yeah.”

“So…if we can do this…won’t it be a suicide mission?” Danny asked quietly.  “The ones going in will have the oil in them, too, and once the wave is sent…”

Alex spoke up.  “There will be a call for volunteers.”  He looked at all of them.  He looked like he was going to say more, but he just set his jaw.  His gaze traveled to Mulder for a moment before blinking back to Danny and Scully.  “Get on it as soon as you can.”

He turned to go when Scully stopped him.  “Krycek…”

He didn’t quite turn all the way.

“I’d like to…interview you…about your own experience being possessed.”  She blinked as he turned his head all the way and looked at her.  “You’re the only one among us that has been.  It would be valuable information to have.”

He hesitated but then he nodded.  “I’ll, uh…”

“Why don’t you cub to our quarters todight, Scuwwy?”  Mulder said helpfully.  “What tibe will you be hobe, Awex?”

The other man cleared his throat, looking around shiftily.  “Uh…probably seven…or so,” he said.

Mulder smiled.  “Good,” he said softly.  “Good.”

………..

Scully called and said she was going to be late, so they ate dinner first before her arrival.  Mulder felt it was probably for the best.  He didn’t want to push…too much.

For a guy with a bad cold, he was feeling rather chipper.

When Scully showed up,  Alex was in the kitchen doing dishes.  Alex was one of those people who did the dishes before he put them in the damned dishwasher.  Mulder suspected it had more to do with keeping his hand up to par than hyper-cleanliness.  Although, he was a laundry freak.  Mulder couldn’t drop trou without them disappearing once he’d decided to put them back on.

“Hey, Scully,” Mulder greeted.

Scully came in past him slowly, cautiously, looking around as if viewing the décor when really she was probably wary of viewing his boyfriend.

“You sound better, Mulder,” she told him, clasping her hands together.

“Yeah, he stuffed me full of herbs and shit and made me lie down for a couple of hours,” Mulder explained.  “I’m peeing neon yellow, but my nose is clear.”

He brought her in and sat her down in the plush Navajo armchair.  He decided a tour, complete with bedroom stop, was unnecessary.  Here’s our big bed where we go at it a couple of times a day like rabid animals, Scully.  Whattaya think?  No.

“Thirsty?” Mulder asked.

She bit her lip.

“I own tea now,” he told her proudly.

Her lips twitched, but she declined.  “Do you have any decaf coffee?” she asked.

Mulder snorted.  “Yes.”  She gave him a funny look and he smiled.  “Nevermind.  Coming right up.”

As he entered the kitchen, Alex didn’t turn.  Mulder came up behind him and wrapped his arms around the other man.

“You look so sexy,” Mulder told him.

Alex laughed, soaping up a rather clean looking salad plate.

“What?”  Mulder asked.

“Just not what I expected you to say,” he said.

"I don’t tell you enough,”  Mulder sighed.  “You look…”  Mulder’s hands ran up Alex’s chest.  “Edible,” he finished.

“Isn’t Scully here?” Alex asked him.

“Yep.  You ready to do this?”

Alex sighed, putting down his last dish.

“I’ll be right there, Alex,” Mulder assured him.

Alex turned in his arms and dragged him in even tighter.  “I know,” he husked.  Then he kissed Mulder’s lips softly and lingeringly, before turning off the water and pushing away from the sink.

They brought out two decafs and a gigantic blueberry, wheatgrass, spirlina, echinacea smoothie for Mulder, tailor made by Alex.

The two men sat on the couch, close, with Mulder’s hand immediately alighting on Alex’s thigh.  Scully pretended she didn’t notice.  She thanked them for the coffee and blew on it stallingly.

“Mmm…’sgood,” she enthused quietly once she’d taken a sip.

“Alex made it,” Mulder readily informed.

Scully’s smile was tight.

“So,” Alex said, then, no trace of social nicety in his voice.  “What do you want to know?”

Scully took a breath and set her coffee down on the table between them.  She cleared her throat.  “Well, first…  How long did it take for the oil to…?”

“Seep in?”  Alex finished.

Scully nodded once.

“Probably a matter of thirty or forty seconds.  I was, uh…”  He shot a glance at Mulder.

Mulder was riveted.  But he was also worried about how talking about this was going to affect Alex.

“The carrier,” Alex went on.  “The woman who followed me to Hong Kong with it…she…she held my face up against the wall in the bathroom…  My feet weren’t even touching the ground.  It’s very strong and very, uh…pain-resistant.”  He swallowed and continued.  “It must release a kind of toxin right away because…I couldn’t move…couldn’t struggle…”  Mulder squeezed his leg gently.  “I could only…hang there…while it crawled into me.”

Alex fidgeted slightly, running his prosthetic through his hair.

“So…it was controlling you from the first instant?” Scully asked.

“It uh…  It kind of…stuns you, but…  I knew what was happening to me.  I didn’t black out or…lose time.”

“Was there a point at which it…took over for you?”

“Brain hijack?  Yeah,” Alex replied.  “But…”  He looked down now, and Mulder saw him blink quickly before answering.  “I never lost consciousness.”  He looked back up, jaw clenched.  “Not once.”

“What did it feel like?”  Scully’s voice was softer now, more invested in the story, maybe forgetting a little just whose story it was.

“By the time it swam over my eyes…it was in control.  I felt like I was outside my body, or confined to a small section of it…way back in my brain…just watching what it did with me.”

Scully nodded.  Mulder moved his hand along Alex’s thigh reassuringly.

“Everything it did…everything it said…how it behaved…none of it was me.  But I could see it, hear it, feel it all.  I just couldn’t stop it.  The only part of me left was the body.  Although, it seemed to have access to everything I knew.”  Alex looked over at Mulder.  “It knew Mulder…  Who Mulder was to me.”

Mulder gave him an apologetic look but Alex just looked down.  “It kept a low profile…not saying too much.  But it never did anything contrary to its subterfuge.”

“I should have known,” Mulder murmured.

Alex’s hand moved to cover Mulder’s own before he went on.

“So it took you to the Smoker with the tape in exchange for the whereabouts of its ship?” Scully asked.

“Yes.”

“And you had no control of how it handled your body during its possession?”

Alex took a shaky inhale.  “Do you think I would have gone down in that silo if I did?” he replied, teeth gritted.

“Alex…”  Mulder soothed, shooting Scully a warning look at the same time.

“I’m sorry,” Scully said, more to recover the interview than because of any real feelings of remorse, Mulder suspected.

But Alex said, “No, I’m sorry.”  He looked at Scully.  “It was a valid question.”

“You said it’s resistant to pain?”  Scully prodded.  “How did you come to know that?”

Alex looked at Mulder again as if he’d asked the question.  “When we crashed on the freeway,” he said.  Mulder nodded.  Alex dropped his gaze.  “They dragged me out and they hit me in the stomach.  I felt it.  But it barely even doubled over.  Its expression didn’t even change.”

Mulder felt a sudden surge of protectiveness.  Like he wanted to turn back time…to pay more fucking attention.  He wanted to have looked into those cold eyes and known that it wasn’t him.

“I watched,” Alex said then.  “As it killed the two men with a radioactive flash.  It doesn’t feel.  Doesn’t have feelings,” he said.  “It was…nothing.  My pulse didn’t even rise.”  He looked up at Scully unblinkingly.

There was a long silence before Scully spoke.

“Well…” she said finally, standing and brushing her hands over her slacks.  “I think that’s good enough.”

Alex and Mulder stood as well and Mulder took Alex’s hand in his.  “Great,” Alex said a little insincerely.

Scully looked from one to the other of them.  She nodded awkwardly and Alex nodded back.  Mulder laced his fingers through the other man’s.

Scully left, Mulder seeing her out.  When he turned, Alex was standing in the middle of the living room, hands shoved in his pockets.  He was shaking a little.

Mulder went to him and thread his arms between Alex’s arms and his body.  The other man let out a controlled sigh.

“I’m sorry,” Mulder whispered.

Alex nodded, but his lashes dropped down over his eyes.  Then he sighed again, heavily, and pulled his hands out of his pockets, wrapping Mulder up in a strong hug.  “Don’t apologize,” Alex rumbled.  “Just get in the bed.”

………

The medical team spent the next two weeks going over the data they had and trouble-shooting at the purely theoretical phase.  Scully was as confident as she could be that an administered superchemotherapy would decimate the immune system enough for the virus to infiltrate the vaccinated body.  And Danny had come up with the idea of injecting the person with melatonin, the hormone secreted by the pineal gland, to give the virus something to feed off of, discouraging it from attaching to the gland right away.

They took another two weeks concocting their various injections, but then finally, Mulder and Alex got the call that they were ready for actual human trials.

A call was sent out for volunteers and Alex seemed surprised by the volume of response.  Mulder had patted his shoulder and kissed his cheek before wandering away to meet Vladi for their basketball date.

The trials took another two weeks in which they had two successful raids on two Consortium strongholds.  It made for a celebratory mood.  Even though everyone knew it was peanuts.  The real deal was getting to the alien ship.

Their guinea pigs were aces.  All of them became inhabited with the virus while retaining control.  Rigorous tests were done to ascertain that in wasn’t just the alien oil ‘playing human.’

All of the test subjects rejected the virus once the chemo ran its course.  The only real side effects were the sleepiness brought on by the introduction of excess melatonin and the nausea from the chemo.  They solved the first problem by adding a stimulant to the injection of the hormone to cancel out its effects.  They combated the second with various pill remedies, not to mention Alex’s suggestion of herbal supplements and teas:  ginger and peppermint specifically.

Another week…and they were ready.  Really ready.

Alex announced the call for volunteers via word of mouth to his most trusted cells within the sixty thousand troops they housed underground in Missouri.  He explained the procedure they’d have to undergo with the chemo, the injections, and the alien virus.  He explained that all volunteers would have to pass a rigorous set of physical and psychological tests.

He explained that those who went on the mission wouldn’t be coming back.

After his department heads left with the message to their troops, Alex silently got up and left the room.  Mulder followed him down the hall, their footsteps echoing in the bare space.  Alex turned the knob on one of the empty conference room doors and went inside.  He sat down in one of the big, high-backed chairs.  Mulder knelt in front of him.  They just shared the silence for a long time with everything going unsaid.

……….

Eighty-four volunteers.  And from that, they narrowed it down to twenty with the tests.  From there it was a simple lottery.

Two were picked to go and two were assigned as back up, only deployed if there was an emergency and the other two could not deliver their payload.

It was set.  A matter of a few days.  Soon, the chosen two would give their lives for the planet.

Mulder said to Alex one dreary, rainy morning, “Let’s send ‘em off in style.”

It was decided they’d have a dinner in their honor.

The Great Hall was full.  It was the night before the mission.  The four soldiers assigned to the task sat with Mulder, Alex, Danny, Scully, Lars, and Vladi.  Far from fearful, they looked proud and solid.  They looked like courage personified.  And unlike the somber mood that some expected, dinner was animated with conversation, warm with smiles and levity…thick with life.

The evening ended early enough for the soldiers to go have some private time…to do whatever they wished to do with the rest of their time.  Mulder watched Alex shake their hands before he did and he had to swallow back the emotion that clogged his throat.

When Mulder and Alex returned to their quarters deep underground, the silence of the place seemed to cocoon them in velvety peace.  They made love slowly, each taking a turn inside the other’s body.

They fucked for hours, neither of them wanting to give it up for sleep, when finally their bodies called it quits and they lay calm in each other’s arms.

Mulder was deeply asleep when something woke him with a start.  Alex was sitting up in bed, and Mulder tried to focus his bleary eyes on his partner.

“Wha…?” he asked, groggily.  “Whazzit, Lexi?”

Then he felt it again…a deep, earth-shaking rumble.

“Shit,” Alex cursed, scrambling out of bed, pulling the sheet off Mulder’s naked body in the process.  Alex began to throw clothes on and Mulder hurried to get himself untangled.

It happened again, this time stronger.  It nearly knocked Mulder off his feet.  “Jesus,” he exclaimed just before their phone rang.

Alex hit the speaker button, trying to get his T-shirt pulled down his body as he looked for his shoes.

Neither of them was prepared for what came over the phone.  It was Lars.  “God, HELP US!!!  THEY’RE HERE!!  IT’S ALL ON FIRE!!  IT’S…” And then the line went dead.

At the same time, their lights went out and the emergency back-up system came on, a dull, orange glow permeating the space.

Alex looked at Mulder and they both finished dressing in a matter of seconds while Alex shouted over what had now become a horrible din of sound, screeching, screaming of metal, and explosions.

Alex ran to their door and Mulder followed, grabbing up his walkie talkie and yelling into it, “Lars?!  Scully?!  Is anybody there?!”

“Shit!”  Alex cursed.  “The door’s stuck!  C’mere and pull!”

Mulder tucked the walkie talkie away and went to Alex’s side, pulling on the heavy metal ineffectually.

“Get my…” Alex grunted.  “Crowbar.”

Mulder nodded and went to the tool closet, wrenching out the big box, knocking the other contents of the closet into loud chaos.

“Hurry!” came Alex’s voice.

“Got it!” Mulder yelled, returning.

Alex wedged it between the door and the six-inch thick wall and began to pry.  Mulder tried the walkie talkie again.

“Nothing,” he declared at getting only static.  “It’s dead.”

“NNNNUHH!” Alex groaned as he finally got the door to pry free.  Debris fell into their foyer…concrete, rock, and metal.

“Dmitri and Jones are dead,” Alex said.

Mulder looked down into the rubbish, seeing the two men lying still under its weight and frowned deeply.

Alex and Mulder had to climb over the pile to get out into the hall which, thankfully, was in halfway decent shape.  The ceiling right above their door had caved partially, but the rest of the hall was walkable, if dark and murky, flashing orange into the deep shadows.

“Fuck, hold on,” Alex said, rushing back in and returning with his own walkie talkie.  He tried it, too, to no avail.  “Shit!”

“Consortium attack?” Mulder asked as they ran down the hall together.  He probably sounded almost hopeful.  He knew the answer before Alex confirmed it.

“Yeah, if the old guys are piloting alien fighter ships nowadays,” he husked.

They made their way to the stairs, not wanting to risk the elevator.  They ran up, Alex in the lead.

“I’m going to the troops.  You check medical, Mulder.  Stay on that thing,”  Alex added, nodding at the walkie talkie.

They began to part ways at sub-level six where the ceiling had once again caved in and now blocked the stairs partially.

“Can you make it?” Mulder asked, breathless.

“Yeah,” his partner answered, checking out the pile of concrete he was going to have to climb over.  He nodded and looked back at Mulder.

Then he squinted, reached out, and pulled Mulder roughly in by the back of the head.  Their lips hit hard.  Mulder opened his mouth to Alex and their tongues fought.  Too soon, Alex ripped himself away, blinking.  “Be careful,” he husked.  “You stay safe, you hear me?” he gritted out, voice thick.  Mulder nodded, looking deeply into Alex’s eyes before the other man turned and took off up the stairs, over the carnage,  toward sub-level three and the barracks.

Mulder stepped into the hall near sickbay and felt ill.  Five of eight metal supports had gone down, leaving the ceiling half exposed, wires hanging down and sizzling.  People lay dead under the debris.  There were so many.   Mulder stepped over three bodies as he made his precarious way toward the lab.

He was almost there when a flash of color caught his eye.

Her red hair.

“No…”  Mulder breathed, scrambling over a pile of broken concrete blocks.  “No…”

He knelt on the floor next to her.  Her little body was crushed beneath a giant slab of concrete.  Blood had stopped flooding from the wound in her head.  It was pooled all around what he could see of her body.  She blurred in his vision, the red of her hair and blood the only distinguishable things in the midst of all the grey.

“Scully…” he choked.  “God, Scully…”

He reached out to find her neck, knowing before he touched her that it was futile.  She had no pulse.  She wasn’t breathing.  She was just…gone.

Mulder covered his mouth as the tears fell down his face.  He shook his head.  “No…”  He stroked her forehead, getting the hair out of her eyes.  “No…Scully…”

Then a voice called from the lab, weak but alive.

“Muh-Mulder?”

“Danny,” Mulder whispered, wiping at his eyes and standing, looking down at his former partner one more time before scrambling down the hall toward his voice that continued to call him.

“Danny!”  Mulder yelled, the tears flowing free.  He turned the corner into the room, throwing a computer out of the doorway and struggling toward the man he saw lying on the floor pinned beneath a large, metal shelving unit.

“Danny…”  Mulder murmured, reaching down for him, but…  The unit had broken and one angry, black pole disappeared into a bleeding wound in Danny’s stomach.  “Danny…”

“Mulder…  It was too fast.”

Mulder nodded.  He reached for Danny and just barely touched his fingers to the other man’s cheek.

“Mulder…you need to…”  He grimaced.  He cast his eyes toward the table at the far end of the room.  “Under…in a…strongbox…  The rest of the….  For the mission…”

“Okay, Danny,” Mulder whispered, stroking his cheek.

“I…hid some…”  Danny told him.  “The rest is…destroyed, but…I think…”

“You did good,” Mulder told him, nodding.  He wiped his eyes.

“Mulder…please tell Vladi I…  Tell Vladi I…I love him and…”  Mulder swallowed, listening, his extremities beginning to tingle in shock.  “Mulder just…”  Danny grimaced again, his own eyes filling with tears.  “Just hold him for me.”

Mulder looked deeply into Danny’s eyes and nodded, his lip trembling.  “I will.” He promised in a whisper.  “I will, Danny.  I will…”

Danny smiled then, closing his eyes.  He took a short, painful breath and then exhaled, “Clusterfuck.”

Then he was gone.

Mulder put his head in his hands and the yell wrenched its way out of his chest like an alive thing.

“NNNNAAAHHH!!!!”

Then he pushed himself up off the floor, stumbling, hurling himself toward where Danny had said the strongbox would be.  He dug in the debris, cutting his hands and ripping with his nails.  “Nuh…nuh…nuh…” he grunted as the debris wavered through his tears.

But finally, he saw it, a pristine black box, unmarred within the rubble.  He grabbed it and opened it, finding inside three vials of each injection and corresponding syringes.  He shut it, squeezing his eyes closed, then he turned and made his way back toward the lab entrance…not looking down at Danny’s lifeless body.  He passed Scully in the hall as well without a backward glance.  He dashed the tears from his eyes, clutching the box to his stomach, and climbed out of what was left of the medical floor, wrenching the stairs door open and leaning against the wall, panting.

He held up the walkie talkie and pressed the button, but his voice failed him for a moment.  Finally he called, “Alex!”

Static.

“Alex, can you hear me?”

Mulder banged his head against the wall.

“Come on, you mother fucker!!” he yelled into the thing.

Static…but then, a cut of clarity.  Then, “Mulder!  Are you all right?!”

“Yes, are you?!”  he shouted, new tears flooding his vision.

“Yeah,” Alex gasped, out of breath.  “Mulder…they’re gone.  The team…  And…shit…  Thousands dead!  Shit, get back down, Mulder.  We can’t get out this way.  Go back down!  I’ll meet you down there.  All right?!”

Mulder nodded and then realized that wouldn’t work.  He hit the button with a shaking thumb.  “Yes,” he practically sobbed.  “Okay!” he yelled.  Then he willed the tears to stop.

Thousands gone.   Dear fucking God.

Mulder looked down at the box he held like a baby in his arms.  He sniffed and blinked at it.

They’re gone.   The team…

The mission…

He started to run down the four flights, praying he had time to do it before Alex could find him.

……….

Alex burst into the room, panting, covered in soot and ash and smeared blood.

“Mulder…” he gasped, coughing.  He staggered forward.  “Mulder…”

Mulder walked forward and Alex grabbed him.  They didn’t embrace.  Mulder thought he might just never move again if Alex held him.  And he couldn’t.  They couldn’t.  Alex stared hard into Mulder’s eyes.

“Medical?”  Alex asked.

Mulder set his jaw and shook his head.

Alex let him go and covered his face in his hands, stalking away.   Then he turned back with a steely gaze, every bit the leader he always was.

“Mulder,” he said.  “You’re gonna stay here.”  He bit his lip.  “All right?  Stay fucking here.  I’m going up to medical.  I know Danny hid the stuff in a damned strongbox somewhere.”  He turned toward the door and began walking away.  “Don’t fucking try to stop me, Mulder.  If you try to stop me I’ll shoot you, I swear to God.”

“Alex.”

Mulder’s voice was soft.  He watched Alex freeze at the door and then turn, eyes narrowed.  Mulder held up the syringe he’d had clenched tightly in his fist.  He swallowed.

“You’re not going, Alex.  I am.”

Alex’s lips parted and his eyes widened.  “Y-“ he started on a gasping breath.  He shook his head.  “No,” he whispered.  “You didn’t.  Mulder…”

Mulder sighed and lowered his hand, feeling his life tremble around him like a flower on the edge of a tornado.  “One of us has to stay.  I’m going,” he told the other man.  “It’s done.”

Alex’s lip trembled making Mulder blink.  “No…”  Alex exhaled.  “No.  NO!” he yelled, turning around and punching the wall.  “Fuck, NO!!!”  He swept his arm across the foyer table, sending the lamp there crashing to the floor in pieces.  Then he came at Mulder, eyes wild with anger and fear and fat, wet tears.  “You selfish…fucking…”  And he grabbed Mulder and pulled him in, holding him hard and shaking with his sobs.  “No!”  He wrenched Mulder in the rough embrace and they stumbled together.  “NO!  You shit, no!”

Then he pulled back, pushing Mulder away from him.  “Where is it?” he snarled.  “Where is it, you son of a bitch?!”

He began stalking the house, overturning tables and emptying drawers.  Mulder followed, trying to grab his arms as he veered into the bedroom.

“No, Alex!  You have to stay!!  Let me fucking do this!!  It’s my destiny!”

Alex whirled on him, but then his eyes darted behind Mulder and widened.

“NO!” Mulder yelled, grabbing at his arms and trying to wrestle him against the wall.

Alex looked at him with fire in his eyes, and a tear ran down his face.  “Fuck you, Mulder,” he spat.  Then he hauled back and slammed his fist into Mulder’s face.

Mulder came to on the floor as Alex withdrew the syringe from his own shoulder.  Mulder tried to focus his eyes, but they burned.  With new tears and old.  His voice was a croak.

“Damn you, Krycek.”

Alex just dropped his eyes to the floor as Mulder struggled up.  Mulder staggered toward him and shoved Alex’s right shoulder, sending him back a step. Alex still wouldn’t look at him.  He shoved him again, this time with both hands.  Mulder had begun to tremble.  He reached out and yanked his partner in by the shirt.  He opened his mouth to yell at him and his voice stuck somewhere under his ribs…protected and imprisoned.  He shook Alex once.  He wanted to shake him again.  But he kissed him instead.

He sealed their mouths tight, and then, desperate for the air his lover breathed, he pried the soft lips open and stole inside with his tongue, taking breath and letting it rush from his own lungs in something like relief or abandon.

Alex’s own breath was hard and heavy against Mulder’s face, affirming with conviction how alive they were in each other’s arms.

Their kiss was a bomb…the time it took to love one another ticking off irretrievably.  Each stroke of Mulder’s tongue was met with one from Alex, and three more seconds peeled back…fell away, hitting the floor like the rind of a fruit, still fragrant with its history embracing the sweetness inside.

Alex pulled back, and it tore a sob from Mulder’s throat.  Alex wrapped his hand firmly and gently behind Mulder’s head, coquettish lashes smeared with tears, weighted slower.  He leaned his forehead against Mulder’s.  His voice shuddered out of him.  What he said was, “Together.”

Mulder swallowed, one more second to drown under.  The emotion coursed down his cheeks, clung to his chin stubbornly, and then dripped off his jaw, too heavy to resist giving up.  Mulder tilted his head and kissed Alex once, softly.    Alex groaned, grabbing him up and mashing their bodies together.

Their mouths were fervent and sloppy at first, hurrying to love, to fuck, to join deeper…deeper…wetter…more.  It was each of them trying to consume the other.  Their tongues pushed.  Their lips twisted, and their hands clutched at fabric, ripping it away to find the warm skin underneath, raking each other raw…pulling like a strong tide.

Mulder pulled away on a sob.

He looked into Alex’s eyes.  He stroked the face in front of his own, so precious to him.  Then he started to tug Alex’s pants open, forcing the button to give way and the zipper to open with a metallic sigh.  He pulled the jeans down Alex’s legs, staring hard into the red-rimmed eyes.  They stared back…naked with everything he wanted and everything he feared.  Alex let himself be undressed, his jeans gathering around his strong thighs…underwear coaxed down as well.

Then Mulder fell to his knees, stroking Alex’s warm legs, lip trembling.  He blinked up to his lover to find him trying…trying so hard, his jaw tight with control being lost.  Mulder closed his eyes and found the hard cock with his lips, brushing reverently on a long, slow sigh.  He wrapped his arms around the other man’s body, holding him as he further parted his lips and took Alex’s erection into the haven of his mouth.

There was a sharp inhale above him before his lover started to quake, his body shaken with the tears he wasn’t letting fall.  Mulder held him tighter and sucked strong and hard, his own tears fast now, thick down his face.  He sobbed around the flesh in his mouth.

Finally, Alex’s hands came up and found him…closed in his hair, then petted, then held him, trembling.  Mulder opened his eyes and looked up to see Alex close his, part his lips, and cry.

“Muh…Muh…” he sobbed.  “Please…  Don’t want it…”  Mulder moved on his cock, making it swell, making it twitch hard.  “Don’t want it to…”  Alex sobbed.  “End.”

Then Alex pushed Mulder away, and before Mulder knew it, Alex was pushing him down to the floor and then he was down on top of Mulder, fumbling with his pants and getting them open and down.  Alex was crying over him and Mulder reached down and stilled his hands.

“Alex…Alex…” he hushed, pulling the bigger man down more fully onto him.  “I know,” he said softly.  He wrapped Alex up in a tight embrace and held firm, burying his face in the corded neck.  “It’s okay,” he said, and Alex made a noise into his hair.  “No, Alex,” he persisted.  Then he took the other man’s face between his hands and found the dark green gaze.  He smiled at his partner.  He tried to nod.  He stroked his thumb over Alex’s plush lips, pliant for him.

Alex calmed at the touch, holding himself over Mulder.  Mulder dropped his hands to Alex’s waist and began pulling his shirt up.  “I have to feel you,” he whispered.

Alex swallowed, squinting and then sat up, straddling Mulder, to take it off over his head.

“Everything,” Mulder instructed, a strange tranquility settling over his body as he slowly removed his own clothes on the floor.

Alex finished.  “Here?” he asked, huskily.

“Yeah,” Mulder whispered.  “I want to feel you pinning me to the floor.”

Alex nodded, his breath coming in little shaky gasps.  He reached over and got the lube out of the bedside table, unscrewing it and slathering his hand and cock with it liberally.  Mulder swallowed, watching him.   Alex worked himself a little longer than he usually did when he was about to make love to Mulder, and Mulder watched the erratic pull of his milking fist paired with the defiant lower lip, striving so not to tremble…on the verge of going under the wave of this.

“Lexi…”  Mulder breathed.  “It’s not the last time.”

Alex gasped, eyes shooting to him.  Mulder smiled and cursed his blurry vision.  He didn’t know if he could explain it to the other man because he didn’t understand himself where it was coming from.  He sighed, heart tight and hurting with how vastly it was opening.

“C’mere,”  he told Alex and his lover blinked quickly trying to stave off the sob that he couldn’t fight now.  It crashed through him and he caved in on it for a moment.  Mulder waited before Alex crawled over to him.

Mulder pulled him down and they kissed again, soft…exquisite…  Prelude to the rest of their lives.

Mulder enfolded Alex in his arms, like petals closing at night.  His fingers felt everything…acute and drifting in the time between past and future.  Skin, now.  Muscles under…aching, flexing, so alive.  Mulder opened his mouth and felt Alex respond, taking him.  He sighed deep, lifting his legs and stroking one hand down to feel for Alex’s thick cock.

The other man flinched a little, stiffening.

“Wanna guide you into me,” Mulder said.

Alex closed his eyes and let Mulder position him.

“Not ready,” Alex shivered out.

Mulder stroked his hair with his free hand.  He looked up at his lover’s face…the frown creasing over his nose.  “Yes, you are,” he whispered reassuringly.  “Come home to me.”

Alex groaned and opened his eyes.  Mulder smiled up at him.  Alex’s eyes stayed with him as he worked the head in and then began to sink his cock into Mulder’s stretched heat until he was sheathed completely.

Mulder groaned, lids fluttering closed on the intensity of the sensation, and Alex remained, unmoving, until Mulder opened his eyes again and looked into his lover’s teal-wet gaze.

“Always liked…looking at you…Alex,” he gasped.  Then he swallowed and took the other man’s face in his hands.  “Keep looking at me,” he said.  “I wanna see the whole thing.”

Alex nodded and a tear fell on Mulder’s chest.  Then Alex pulled back, sliding his cock out halfway.  Mulder grunted at the burning glide of it leaving him before Alex stroked back in, smoothly widening the way once more.

Through it all, they looked at one another, panting quietly and rocking gently.  Mulder threw Alex’s hair into a riot of spikes with his questing fingers.  Alex bent down and slid his tongue into Mulder’s mouth.  Their eyes flitted closed for moments as they kissed, but then Alex drew back once more, groaning a little protest at now letting the pace build, his hips pushing Mulder down into the carpet, his cock driving Mulder’s passage open, arms pinning…just like Mulder had wanted.

Mulder began to move with Alex, a little more urgently.

“Can’t…end…”  Alex murmured over him.

Mulder pushed his ass against the thrust of Alex’s cock.  “Let it go,” he urged.  “It’s okay to…let it go…”

He groaned as Alex’s cock brushed his prostate now on each desperate push inside.  He clutched at Alex’s back, his ass, his hair, shoulders…anything he could reach, his hands pleading for release even though he was crying now, too.  He arched beneath his partner and wailed as he began to come between their bodies.

“Oh god…”  Alex sobbed.  “No…no…”

“Yes,” Mulder sobbed back.  “I love you…yes…”

Alex groaned, open-mouthed as he came inside Mulder.  He sobbed Mulder’s name, his hips thrusting through his climax, and Mulder held him, watching his lover love him.

They held each other for seconds that seemed slow and on their side, only to gain momentum, carrying them into the next moment and then the next against their will.  Alex’s cock went soft and slipped out.  Mulder’s breath calmed.  Their bodies cooled.

Mulder shifted his leg and Alex tensed on a gasp.

“You know we have to,” Mulder told him.

He felt Alex breathe deeply against him, their skin brushing sensuously.

“Alex…”  Mulder tried gently.

Alex nodded and then moved away, off of Mulder.  They stood and Mulder took Alex into his arms again.  They held one another for another long series of silent seconds, bodies flush, naked, weak and yearning.

Suddenly, Alex growled, “I love you so goddamned much, you asshole.”

Mulder squeezed his eyes shut and kissed Alex’s cheek hard.  “I know,” he murmured.

……….

They were dressed and armed.

“Lars is alive,” Alex said.  “He’s getting as many as he can.  There aren’t many.”

Mulder nodded.

“We have to use the emergency exit,” Alex told Mulder.  “Everything from sub-three up is gone.”  He dug in his pocket, all business, and extracted the disk.  “I salvaged this, though.”

“I knew I married you for a reason,” Mulder told him on a mischievous smile.  At Alex’s stunned look, Mulder added, shrugging, “The hell with it, we’re dead, right?”

Alex looked at him a moment longer, disbelieving, then he shook his head wryly and stashed a third gun, this one at his back.

They headed out, down the hall to the never-used steel door at the far end.  Once through, they were in a tunnel, long and dark.  Alex lit a flashlight and led the way.  Mulder kept his mind on taking action, even just putting one foot in front of the other.  He could too easily topple over the edge of one emotion or another, giddy abandon or deep, horrible sadness.  He preferred the first but knew he could drift into insanity there all too easily.  He took each breath deliberately and watched Alex’s determined back.

They twisted and turned, always uphill.  They both had guns drawn, but when they came to the door at the other end of the tunnel it was to open it and find nothing and no one on the other side.  They shared a look and cautiously stepped out, sticking to the rock wall before making a break for the trees.  They both knew the alien attack had been called off a long time ago.  The explosions had stopped before Mulder had even gotten to medical.

“The Expedition,” Alex said, and with Mulder close on his heels they made their way through the trees half a mile to where the spare car was always kept.  Thankfully, the aliens’ target had only been the compound itself and the truck was unscathed.  They climbed in and Alex started the engine.

When they turned down the steep, rock-strewn road, Mulder finally saw what was left of the compound.  Smoke filtered up through the tree branches like a signal to the gods.  The trees closest were charred or felled.  The others that still stood looked on, silent and helpless, surrounding the black, gaping hole.

“Christ,” Mulder breathed.

Alex said nothing, just putting his foot down harder on the gas and speeding them past the wound in the earth that used to be all the fortress anyone could need.

They’d driven for fifteen minutes in silence when Mulder began to feel sick.  “You, uh…” he started, gulping back his nausea.  “You bring the meds for…?”

“You feeling sick?” Alex asked, a concerned frown creasing his already serious face.

Mulder nodded.

“No,” Alex told him.  “But there should be something in the glove compartment.”

“You mean the jockey box?” Mulder goaded.

“No, I mean the glove compartment,” Alex insisted.  But it had the desired effect and Alex’s face relaxed somewhat.

They hit a big bump and Mulder brought his hand to his mouth, stifling the bile that wanted to rise.  He dug in the box and found a bag of lozenges.

“Lemon ginger,” Alex said.

Mulder smiled a little and unwrapped one.  He held it out to Alex with a small sound of question.

Alex looked over at him and then held the wheel with his left as he held out the right.  Mulder let his fingers brush the palm of Alex’s hand indulgently before depositing the medicinal candy.

“Thanks,” Alex husked, popping it into his mouth.

Mulder got one out for himself and then laid his hand on Alex’s thigh as they drove on, coming out onto a small highway that would take them over the border into Tennessee.  Where the others would have been headed by now had the attack not come.

“Who knew,” Mulder said wonderingly, watching the pines flash by on either side of them.

“Who knew what,” Alex asked, sounding wary.

“That we’d be back in Tennessee,” Mulder told him.  “Wanna take a side trip down to Graceland first?  Commune with the King?”

Alex’s face was implacable.  “You’re twisted, Mulder.”  Then his lips quirked up at the corners.

They discussed what plans they could, even though they’d gone over them with their predecessors a hundred times.  They’d just walk in, the oil present in their bodies a free pass through the cloak to whatever lay in wait beyond.

They’d gotten pretty detailed schematics from the Rebels, so they theoretically knew what to expect once they got in.  But Alex didn’t like theory as much as Mulder did, so a serious frown seemed always to cloud his lover’s countenance on the drive to the cave they’d chosen.

It was just after eight o’clock in the morning when Alex pulled off the road and drove up an overgrown path into the trees, finally parking and killing the engine.  He looked at Mulder, and Mulder met his gaze.

“Let’s go,” Mulder said, finding Alex’s hand with his own and clasping it tightly.  “I’ll buy you a beer at B.B. King’s after.”

Alex’s eyelashes fluttered.  “I want champagne, cheapskate.”

Mulder smiled.  “You got it.”

They got out and started up the path.  “Hey, remember where we parked,” Mulder called.  Alex rolled his eyes.

They trekked along the path for about a mile and then cut through the trees.  They made their way through the forest for over an hour, having parked far enough outside the ship’s circumference to be well out of the way of the aliens’ detection.

They came upon a rise that overlooked a valley below, one wall of which on the far side was solid, grey rock.  Not solid, they knew.  In its base were three large openings to caverns.  Mulder peered down and could barely make out small figures entering.  He dug out his binoculars.  The people had a gurney of sorts between them that they were transporting into the cave mouth.  Others followed behind, walking placidly as they disappeared into the darkness.

He lowered the binoculars and looked at Alex.  “You ready?” he asked, swallowing.

They were standing close, side by side.

“If something happens…” Alex began.

“You know I’m not leaving you,” Mulder interrupted.  He reached out and stroked across Alex’s set face.  The other man sighed in frustration.

“Mulder…”

“I’m with you,” Mulder told him emphatically.  “By your side.”  He swallowed again.  “That’s how it is, so just forget about anything else.’

“By my side…”  Alex repeated on a resigned breath.  He closed his eyes.

Mulder found Alex’s right hand with his and clasped it between their bodies, against their heaving chests.  Alex’s eyes came open under moist lashes and his jaw was defiant as he took Mulder’s hand in his prosthetic as well, holding it between warm flesh and strong plastic and metal alloy.  They stared at each other strong and hard, and then Alex kissed him violently, biting Mulder’s mouth and gripping his hand painfully.  Mulder’s other hand rose and found Alex’s head, grasping the back of his neck, and he sobbed into his partner’s mouth.

“No regrets,” he whispered against Alex’s lips, pulling the hair in his fist.

Alex pulled his hands away and framed Mulder’s face in them.  Mulder’s hand fell against Alex’s chest and rested there over his thudding heart.  They breathed together, close and warm.  Then Alex looked into his eyes, blinking, and Mulder wished he could hold onto that moment indefinitely.  Just Alex looking at him like that.  Just feeling him so near, their lives so entwined.  But he was the one to pull back first, and a horrible pain seized his chest.

“I could stand here all day, dammit, let’s go,” he managed around the lump in his throat.

Alex blinked, then straightened.  “Follow me,” he said.  “And stick close.”

Mulder smirked.  “How close?”

Alex sighed.  “Just don’t get us caught, pervert,” he said, then he turned and started down the winding path toward the caves.

Mulder followed, and they stuck to the trees, coming at the clearing from the left.

Mulder’s heart began to pound dangerously against his ribs as they neared.  He was used to a full-out attack, or infiltrating enemy hold-outs in secret.  Just walking into the lair in broad daylight was a different story and much more terrifying, Mulder thought.  He kept his attention on Alex’s back, never wavering away from it and drawing strength from the other man’s nearness.  He felt the oil move deep under his skin as he’d felt off and on since the infection and repressed a shudder.

As they descended, Mulder realized that what had appeared to be a small hole in the rock from the hilltop was actually about three stories in height and a couple car lengths wide.  It was ominously black, concealing untold horrors behind its shadows even before the more unnatural cloaking barrier they’d find inside.

He and Alex did not speak after their exchange on the hill.  Mulder wanted to crack a joke, but they were too close now, the cave seeming to come at them, hungry to take them inside and never let them out.  Mulder even imagined that a dull roar echoed from within.  His mother always had told him he had an over-active imagination, seeing monsters were there were none.

Alex stopped.  “Do you hear that?”  he whispered.

Mulder frowned.  “Yeah,” he answered, surprised to find that Alex could hear it, too.  “Like a…low hum…”  he went on.  Then he gasped.  “It’s the frequency.  We’re hearing it.”

Alex looked at him and slowly nodded.  “Once we get inside, you remember where to go?” he asked.

Mulder gave him a look.  “Yeah, in fact, why the hell are you in front?  You my bodyguard, Mr. Costner?”

“What?” Alex asked, squinting, truly confused.

Mulder rolled his eyes.  “Never saw it, huh?  I’ll explain later,” he promised.  “Or if I don’t, it will all just unfold for you as divine knowledge, I’m sure.  Now lemme go first.”

Alex was still frowning, but he nodded, and they continued with Mulder in the lead.  They both knew who had the eidetic memory after all.  Mulder had to fight not to look on in awe as they finally stepped out of the trees and into the vast clearing before the cave mouth.  He schooled his face calm and normal and walked at an even pace toward the gaping passage.

There didn’t appear to be any more oil-possessed people around the entrance, coming or going, and Mulder breathed a little sigh of relief as he walked into the shadow of the wall and then finally into the dark mouth itself.

His eyes took a moment to adjust as he slowed and made his way forward.  He felt Alex close behind him and let that ease his pulse back down out of the danger zone.

There was a wide path cut out of the rock that led them down into the darkness.  Mulder didn’t dare pull out a flashlight, so he just walked slower as the light faded behind them.

Soon, though, he felt rather than saw an intense vibration just ahead in the black.  He stopped.  Alex bumped him from behind and it was all he could do not to murmur a small apology.  He took a breath and one shaky step forward.  The hum intensified.  Another step and he felt himself vibrating with it.  He took one more deep breath, feeling like he was about to step off the edge of a cliff where only darkness and deep, drowning water waited for him far below.  And really sharp rocks.  And maybe sharks.

Mulder took a step, and suddenly he was in a shimmering green tunnel, the walls like jade ice, round and lit from within.  He looked behind him and saw Alex on the other side of a fluctuating wall.  It moved like it was made of liquid, like thick water. And Alex, Mulder realized, didn’t see him.  The other man was frowning and looking up and down, his eyes completely dilated black by the darkness he was still in.

Mulder took a step back now into the green hall and watched Alex step forward through the fluid, electric caress of the cloak.  Alex saw him then before he cast his own gaze around the green passageway for a moment.

Mulder turned and started forward, recollecting the trail of mapped hallways like he’d traveled them a hundred times.  He tried to look inconspicuous although he desperately wanted to run his hand along the wall and feel its temperature and consistency.  It appeared crystalline, its depth indeterminable.

Two men turned a corner ahead and came toward them.  Mulder heard Alex’s warning inhale behind him.  He trained his features blank and hoped there wouldn’t need to be some sort of interchange.

He walked forward, unvarying in his step, and the two went single file as they passed one another.  He breathed an inward sigh of relief as the meeting passed without incident.

They were just turning the corner that would lead them into one of the many spiraling hallways navigating the craft’s giant circumference when Mulder heard behind them, “You.  Stop.”

Mulder ignored it and kept walking, now with his heart in his throat.

“You there!  You are altered!  Stop!” came the alarmed voice.

“Go,” Alex whispered and Mulder’s breath hitched as he took off at a run.

He didn’t hear Alex behind him after a few steps, so he turned and his step faltered.  They had apprehended Alex…  He was held between them, arms banded in their gripping hands.  How…?

“GO!” Alex yelled, putting up a struggle.  And then Mulder knew.  He’d done it on purpose, to buy Mulder time.

The moment seemed to stretch as he looked back at Alex, wrenching futilely in the two men’s grasp.  Their eyes met, Alex’s full of fire…pleading with him to keep running, to keep going.  Mulder staggered back, unwilling to turn. If he turned, he’d never seen Alex again.

Not the last time, his mind screamed.  And then Alex screamed again, “MULDER, RUN!!!”

Mulder nodded once, their eyes locked painfully, and then he turned and ran…as fast as he could.  Away from Alex.  Irreparably away.  He choked back the sobs as he pushed himself around corner after corner, spiraling and twisting back on himself until he rounded the last corner and three more oil-possessed people came at him from the other end, blocking the doorway he needed.  The control room.

Mulder pulled his weapon and began firing, taking two of the men out in the chests and the woman in the shoulder.  They all fell, but only to ooze black blood as the alien oil seeped from their wounds.  Mulder ran over them and the oil followed as he got to the round door and pushed it open with a groan.

A round room bare of furniture with five gestated aliens facing different points which lit up in front of them.  They all turned as he entered, and Mulder pulled his second gun and began firing rounds haphazardly at the nearest one, feeling the oil begin to crawl up his legs, slithering like slow, black snakes.

The alien fell, but not before the second came at him and tackled him to the ground.  Mulder fought its clawing hands as it screamed at him.  He got off several rounds in its side and it fell away, flailing horribly.

The third was right behind it and Mulder fired both guns into its hissing face even as the fourth launched itself at him.  He rolled, but it snared the flesh of his arm and tore the skin and muscle away almost to the bone.

Mulder cried out and took aim with his left hand, firing and taking the alien down and then scampering away from the last one.  It stood, motionless, hissing quietly across the room.  Right in front of where the Rebels said the appointed indentation could be found.

And Mulder realized he was out of bullets.

“Damn,” he murmured, and the thing opened its jaws, showing its impressive fangs.  It growled at him, the sound ticking slightly at the back of its throat.

Then it tilted its head and hissed shortly, succinctly and, suddenly, the oil that had been working its way up Mulder’s body, slithered back down, pooling at his feet and then sliding away into the recesses of the room, as if on command of this thing.

Mulder dropped the empty guns, frowning, his arm dripping blood onto the floor now.  He began to reach cautiously to his back for the knife Alex had made him bring when, without warning, the thing sprung and landed on him, propelling him backward and knocking the wind out of him.

It slashed at his face and opened three gashes across his cheek that felt like searing, wet fire to Mulder.  He screamed even as he hit at the alien with his injured arm and withdrew the knife from its place at his lower back and brought it around, cutting the alien’s torso with a quick, short, deep slice.

It was enough to drive the alien away from him and let him up.

Mulder staggered to standing, bleeding profusely from his arm and face and panting.  He got a better grip on the knife, teeth gritted, and circled the thing warily.  It growled again, wiggling its claws slowly in preparation.

Mulder decided on a good offense and feinted to the right before lunging forward and stabbing the alien in the torso again, jumping back before it could rip him open once more.  The alien bellowed in pain, the sound echoing through the room.

Mulder took his eyes off of his hissing opponent for just a moment, checking where he stood now in relation to the wall he wanted.  Just six feet.  And there.  There, camouflaged in the wall, was a small disc.  Mulder gasped just before he caught the flash out of the corner of his eye as the alien snarled and attacked.

Mulder turned just in time and stuck the knife point into the thing’s body deeply.  It shrieked loudly, floundering and gashing Mulder’s chest badly before falling away and stilling on the floor next to the others.

A siren wailed then, nothing like Mulder had ever heard before, and Mulder heard footsteps coming down the hall toward the room.  He hurried over to the door, slamming it closed and then dragging two alien bodies in front of it just in case it hadn’t locked.  He then ran to the panel, eyes sweeping over the disc before he reached out and tried to pry it loose.

They were outside the door now, banging on it with thunderous, echoing fists.  Mulder pried at the disc’s edges frantically and couldn’t get it to budge.  The banging from outside continued, louder, and Mulder looked fearfully to the door, his breath coming out in panicked exhales.

He turned back, dizzy from loss of blood, the oil beginning to seep from his own body now, too.

“No!!!” he sobbed.

Then finally, through his tears, he saw the small, round button barely protruding at the disc’s side.  He pressed it and it fell out into the palm of his hand.  Suddenly, the banging stopped, and a confused five-tone, chaotic buzz took up residence in his own head.  The black bleeding stopped as the oil seemed to become disoriented.

Mulder maneuvered his own disc from his pocket with slippery fingers, both blood and sweat-soaked.  With a sob he fit the disc into the depression.

“Alex…” he whispered, the tears now mixing with the blood on his face.  “For you, Alex…”

And he turned it, wrenching it into its locked position.

A high, horrid scream that seemed to originate deep within his own skull exploded into vibrating, piercing sound.   It reached down his body, ripping through his chest and gut and limbs, knocking him to his knees.  Mulder screamed, too, but the sound was lost under the wave of high-pitched noise now breaching his very skin.

Mulder fell onto his side, the pain unbearable.  His whole body seemed to glow with pain.  He saw his hand on the floor in front of him and it was translucent white…lit from his pulsing veins with horrible, unending fire.

Mulder thought of Alex…of his lover crumpled to the ground like he was.  He screamed with the unbelievable fire igniting his body and burning his pores open to flood the room with the awful resonance.  He couldn’t think of Alex.  He couldn’t think.  The pain was everything, and he was nothing.  Mulder fell under its shrieking horror and then began to pull away, fading to a soft, welcoming darkness.  Mulder left willingly, his soul sighing with relief as the shriek got farther away from him…dwindled away to the buzz of a bee, and then he just finally ceased to hear at all.  He ceased to exist.

………….

He woke to a bright light.  It pervaded his closed lids, and he remembered.  He winced in preparation for pain.  But there was none.  His lips parted and he hesitated before blinking his eyes open.

No ship.  Which was why it was so bright.  The sun was high over-head, shining serenely down on him.  Mulder squinted and struggled up onto one elbow.  He looked around.  Debris everywhere.  But not alien.  Just…rocks.

He was in a hole.  A big hole.  Close to the surface.  He looked around for something to help him pull himself out.  Tree roots.  He wandered over to them, looking around himself in confusion before climbing up onto a big rock and then grabbing the roots and pulling himself up to the lip of the hole.

Mulder crawled free and looked around himself.  There were large pieces of the rock wall all around, littered like a giant child’s blocks.  The entire cliff-face seemed to have caved in on itself and come crashing down.  His eyes widened as he took in the enormous amount of destruction.  Where there had been a ten-story high wall of rock, there was now…sky.  And where the ship had been…a hole in the ground.

So it had happened.

Mulder looked down at himself, at his pristine shirt and jeans.  No rips.  No blood.  He felt over the front of his own body and he felt…fine.

“Alex…” he breathed on a gasp now.

Mulder turned around himself.  Somehow…he’d survived.  He didn’t know how, but he’d made it.  Maybe enough of the oil had left his body when the frequency changed.  Then why had it hurt so goddamned much?

Mulder looked out toward the clearing, toward the hilltop they’d stood on…kissing one last time.

“Alex!” he called, eyes brimming with new tears.  Tears at the echoing silence that greeted him.  He was alone.  And yet…he wasn’t afraid exactly.  Or sad.  He was just…crying.

“Alex!!!!” he tried again, making his way over slabs of granite and between boulders until he was free of the detritus.  He squinted into the sun-lit valley, watching the light shimmer the horizon.

“ALEX!!!!” he called.

He waited.  He turned on himself.  His own breath was all he heard.

Until…

“Alex?”  his voice came out soft and hopeful as a branch cracked as if beneath a boot.  He’d turned quickly toward the sound.  And he waited as the shadows moved and suddenly…  He was there.  His Alex.  Walking toward him.  “ALEX!” Mulder yelled and began running.  “ALEX!!”

“Mulder?!” came the yelled reply.

Mulder smiled, his lover still but a large dot on the horizon, coming out of the wreckage where the ship had been.  Mulder ran on legs that seemed to propel him faster than ever before, almost not even on the ground.  He didn’t feel the impact through the soles of his feet.  Just the whir of wind and the incredible knowledge that somehow…there he was.

He sobbed as he ran and now Alex was running at him…calling his name…and it sounded so beautiful.  More so than it ever had.  That beloved voice, so strong and real…almost musical.  Wonderful.

They neared and Mulder saw that Alex, too, was crying, his tears glinting in the sun.  He was beautiful.  Just…beautiful.  “Oh Alex,” Mulder breathed as they collided and Alex’s arms came around him, warm and tight.  Mulder grasped at the other man as they turned with the force of their coming together.

“Mulder…”  Alex rumbled, hands gripping and holding tight…tighter.

“Oh God Alex,” Mulder sobbed into his shoulder.  And then he was laughing.  “You’re here,” he cried.  “You’re here.”  Ecstatic tears rolled down his face and wet his lover’s shirt.  He felt so good.  He felt so perfect, fit so dearly into his embrace.

Mulder pulled away, smiling.  “How is this…?” he started to ask.  But then his mind tripped and fell, unable to finish the words.  He heard sirens in the background, closing in.  And a helicopter.  Had the others come for them?  The ones that had survived?

Alex frowned at him and Mulder tilted his face up to watch the helicopter come over the trees.   Then people were running into the clearing…men and women in uniform…running toward them and toward the horrid gash in the earth.

Alex tensed and began to back away, afraid.

“No…” Mulder told him, the suspicion solidifying…the facts coming together and becoming real.  “No stay…  It’s okay, Alex,” he said.

Alex looked at him like he’d lost his senses.  But Mulder just smiled at his partner, new tears glistening in his own eyes.

“Wait, Alex,” he said.  And he reached out for the other man’s hand.  Alex swallowed and took it.  Mulder edged in closer and watched as the people not only ran toward them…but finally through them, unseeing and not even slowing.

Alex started, mouth coming open and hand trying to rip from Mulder’s.

“No!” Mulder said, eyes wide himself.  “No, Alex!  It’s all right!”

A paramedic ran head strong straight through Mulder’s body, coming out the other side and Mulder gasped, looking at Alex with an awed smile.

“Alex, I…  I think we’re…dead.”  He swallowed.  “We’re dead, Alex,” he said softer.

He stepped closer to his lover, their gazes locked.

“But I can…touch you,” Alex protested.

Mulder looked down at their joined hands as the helicopter landed a few yards away.  “Alex…” he said.  “Look.”

Alex looked down at where their fingers linked and gasped.  Mulder smiled at him.

“It’s…”  Alex ripped his hand away and brought it up to his face.  “It’s real,” he whispered.  “Mulder, it’s real,” he said again, now looking back at him.

Mulder reached out and took Alex’s face in his hands.  “I knew I’d see you again,” he replied, but he choked on the end, the emotion overcoming him.  “Alex,” he said on a sob.

He watched Alex’s lip tremble.  He inhaled sharply and leaned in, taking it between his own lips and kissing his lover with a searing tenderness.  He felt Alex’s hands come up and tentatively touch him.  Both hands.  So warm still.  God, it felt good.  More than good.

“Alex,” he whispered against the moist lips.

“Mulder…” Alex breathed, still afraid.

Mulder kissed him, tonguing his lips open and letting him feel how very real it was.  And then suddenly, Alex’s arms were banded around him, squeezing, crushing, lifting him, and he was sobbing into Mulder’s mouth and kissing him back.  Delicious and undeniable.

“Love you…”  Alex murmured between fervent kisses.

Mulder couldn’t stop smiling, running his hands over Alex over and over.  “I know.  God, Alex, I know how much,” he sighed, realizing he did.

Medics ran past, oblivious, and this time Alex laughed, a deep throaty chuckle that Mulder felt like rain washing him clean.

“Fox,” Alex breathed.  “God, Fox…”

Mulder smiled, stroking over the strong, whole body mashed to his own.

“Fox…”

Mulder’s head snapped up as his name came from behind him.  He turned, still holding onto Alex. Then he turned back.  “Did you…?”

“Yeah,” Alex answered.  Then he nodded, indicating something over Mulder’s shoulder.  “There.  Mulder, there…”  And something about the awe in the other man’s voice made Mulder’s breath catch in this throat.  When he turned and saw her, he understood.

In the distance.  Calling him again.  “Fox!”  This time with excitement.  She waved, her thick, brown braids swinging.

“Sam?”  Mulder’s voice quavered.  He didn’t want to take his eyes off her.  He reached down blindly and found Alex’s hand, gripping.

“Come on!” she called.  Then she turned and ran in the other direction.

“Wait!  Sam?!” Mulder called, now tugging on Alex and breaking into a run.

He heard Alex following him as he took off after the girl.  She was older…  Was it really her?

“Alex?”  Mulder called, still running.

“Yes, go!” Alex called back, right behind.

Mulder hit the trees, ducking past them, the girl always several yards ahead.  He was moving so fast…almost flying.

“Fly with me!” she called back, smiling and then giggling as she ran faster.

Mulder turned back to Alex, still running forward and remarkably not hitting trees every other step.  Alex smiled at him.  Mulder said it to him, then, because it felt so good to hear it.

“Fly with me.”

Alex smiled.  Mulder laughed and ran faster, turning and feeling the wind caress his face as he followed her swaying braids and infectious laughter.  His vision blurred as he ran, feet definitely no longer touching.  So fast…  So beautiful…  Samantha in the lead…Alex following him.  The tears ran down his face uninhibitedly, whipped away by the warm wind.

Soon, she slowed.  Finally, he caught up to her.  She turned, breathless, and smiled at him.  Older now…maybe fourteen.  And so beautiful.

“Samantha…”  Mulder said softly, his voice edged with happy tears.

“Fox,” she said warmly.  “I missed you.”  She held out her arms…open…inviting…and Mulder walked into them, holding her close and feeling her sparkling spirit enfold him in an energy larger than her little body.

“I missed you, too,” he choked out, rocking her in his arms.

He held onto her for a long time and it was she who finally wriggled out of his grasp.  “Fox,” she said.  Then she smiled around him at Alex.  “Alex,” she beamed.  “Come over here,” she instructed.

She turned away again and Mulder reached out for Alex’s hand as they then followed together, walking.

Mulder looked up…at how the light shone through the tree branches now, flooding the forest a glowing green.  The exact color of Alex’s eyes.  “Oh…” he breathed, watching as the warm wind stirred the leaves into a slow-motion dance around them and the sun sparkled everything to brilliant life.

“Where are we?” he asked his sister.

She turned and winked at him, then giggled again.  She led them to a rise, not unlike the one he and Alex had stood upon before they commenced their mission.  Mulder took a step and stood beside his sister, looking down at her.

“Look, silly,” she said.

So Mulder looked down, eyes coming to rest on the scene below, and he gasped.  He felt Alex inhale next to him and grip his hand tighter.

“Oh my God…” Mulder sighed.

Below them was another valley. But this one…  It was verdant with life…huge palm trees, pines, redwoods…  And amidst them, a waterfall over a bleached white cliff…   The water cascaded down into a lake…glittering teal in the sun.  Flowers bloomed everywhere.  The whole place glowed and glittered, flowing in the soft breeze, a beautiful, ethereal whole.

And from the scene below walked another figure.  Mulder squinted to see him as he approached calmly.

“It’s okay, Fox,” Samantha told him brightly.  “It’s just Dad.”

Mulder gasped, the tears springing to his eyes once more.  Alex stiffened beside him and let go of his hand.  Mulder couldn’t turn to him as his father came to stand before them, smiling serenely.

“Fox…” the man breathed.  Then he held out his arms to embrace him.

“Dad?”  Mulder asked.

His father smiled at him and enclosed him in his arms.  “I’ve been waiting for you,” his father told him as he was wrapped in the solid, protecting arms.

“Dad…”  Mulder shuddered, closing his eyes and weakening in his father’s hold.  “Dad…”

“Fox,” Bill Mulder said, leaning back to look at him.  “I am so proud of you.”

Mulder’s lip quivered and his father took him into his arms again.  How did he know?  How did he know?

His father pulled away again and to Mulder’s surprise, turned then to Alex.  Mulder inhaled, not knowing what to expect.

“Alex…” Bill Mulder said softly.  And then, “Son…”  And once again he held out his arms.

Alex gasped beside him but then allowed himself to be embraced, closing his eyes, lashes wet with tears he didn’t shed.  “But…I…” he stammered roughly.

“All is different now,” Bill Mulder said.  He leaned back to look at Alex, then let go to face Mulder, too.  “You will learn how things work here,” he said.

Then Sam piped up.  “Tell them about how they’ve always been together!”

Mulder looked  at Alex as his father spoke.

“I think they already know,” he said.

Mulder sipped in his breath.  “You mean…always?” he asked without looking away from Alex.  He was already reaching out…taking his lover’s hand in his again.

“Yes,” his father confirmed.  “Every time.  Always.  For a very, very long time.”

Alex’s tears finally fell, and Mulder moved in closer, wiping them away with the pad of his thumb.  His tears felt like silk.  A gift.  Mulder blinked at him…slowly comprehending what he was being told.  Together.  Forever.

He looked back at his father.  “Do we have to go back?” he asked, fear edging his voice.  He didn’t want to lose Alex again…have to not know again…maybe hurt him again.  The idea filled him with dread.

“No,” his father told him, and Mulder looked back at Alex.  “This was your last time.  Both of you.  They will go on now in your wake.”

“Who will?”  Mulder asked.  “Humans?  Did we…?”

“Yes,” Bill Mulder said with a nod.  “Because of you, son.  Because of you both.”

Mulder swallowed back the surge of emotion.

It was Alex who spoke in a roughened voice.  “So can we…”  He looked down at the wonderful valley below.  “Stay?”

Sam ran around and wrapped Alex in a warm, tight hug.  “As long as you like!” she smiled.  Alex’s hand came to rest on her shoulder and he smiled tentatively, casting a look Mulder’s way.

“I have so many questions,” Mulder said, looking around.  Though all he could think about, for some reason, was taking a huge cannonball into that lake.  He grinned.  Suddenly, Alex looked at him with a crooked, surprised smile.  Mulder looked at him in return.  Had he…heard him?

Alex looked confused, but then he said lowly, “Cannon…ball?”

Mulder barked a laugh.  Alex’s confused look slowly transformed into a smile.

“They’re good, Dad!” Sam exclaimed.

“Yes,” his father agreed.  “Yes, they are.”

Alex’s smile softened.

“But you gotta hurry!” Sam insisted now.

“Why?” Mulder asked, still smiling.

Sam made a frustrated sound and Mulder thought she sounded like the teenager she must have been before she’d come here.  “The others!” she said in annoyance.  “They’re waiting!”

Mulder looked at Alex and swallowed.  The others.

“You know…”  Sam encouraged.  “Deep Throat?  Alex’s mom?  Missy, the guys, Danny, Vladi?”  She took Mulder’s other hand.  “The enigmatic Dr. Scully?”

Mulder inhaled sharply.  He didn’t know whether to laugh or cry.  He looked to Alex.  He smiled at his lover whose eyes shimmered brightly.  “Well…”  Mulder breathed, bringing Alex’s fingers to his lips and kissing them.  He spoke against their warmth.  “Let’s go.”

They followed a skipping Samantha down the hill.

THE END

---

Lyrics given to me by Verily:

By My Side by 3 Doors Down

They blazed a trail I dared to run.
They built this world and I have come.
I need another, like a brother,
For a cryin' shoulder.

This could be the last time
You will stand by my side
I can feel my soul, it's bleeding.
Will you fly with me this evening?

Sober mind, time now is gone.
They carved my body, not of stone.
A petty maze of emptiness,
I've said 'the hell with all the rest.'

This could be the last time
You will stand by my side.
I can feel my soul, it's bleeding.
Will you fly with me tonight?

This could be the last time
You will stand by my side
I can feel my soul, it's bleeding.
Will you fly with me this evening?

End Notes:  All information on the Emergency Alert System (EAS) is as valid as I could make it, with the wonderful help of my beloved, Satina.  The information on the Washington Merry-Go-Round was taken from a show on UFOs and is very real as well.

Thank you so much for reading!   Feedback loved eternally HERE.